Darkness Into Light
by calladragon
Summary: Lisbon has a Secret Admirer. Who might it be? ***ON HIATUS***
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Thank you to all my Guests who reviewed Ouroborus. You are greatly appreciated as always.

I'm not one hundred percent sure what this story will be. I have a plunny (plot bunny) and I'm going with it. We'll see what happens. As I figure out more , I'll update the synosis. I won't tell a lie. This is another Ouroborus or Settling the Score where I'm flying by the seat of my pants with no idea where I'll end up! What else is new?:)

Also, DiL will not be undated quickly. I'm shooting for updating one chapter a week. As I've already said, I'm turning most of my attention back to my Historicals and Romantic Suspense novels for a while. I tend to burn out on my original work and pursue fanfic for a while before returning to my first love. Thanks for understanding. ~Calla

#####

Jane watched the scene unfolding before him with more shock than he usually felt. For one thing, he recognized the driver and passenger in the familiar black SUV and he knew Lisbon did as well. It was Harley and Buck from Homeland Security. Two of the more tolerable Agents they'd been forced to work with over the past several months. They'd met with both men not two hours ago at the CBI to discuss a case they were sharing.

Sensing the impact before his brain processed the blur of a blue luxury import plowing through the red light into the side of the SUV, Jane watched the larger of the two vehicles spin wildly into a telephone pole before coming to a stop much too close to that closed gas station for his peace of mind. Feeling the jar of Lisbon slamming on the brakes about the same time he absorbed the crash, Jane wasn't surprised by the sudden, screeching halt of _their_ SUV. Or by the sight of his "Boss" throwing open her door to leap off the seat before weaving across four lanes of traffic in the direction of their injured comrades.

Nor was he surprised by Lisbon's very vocal demand that he head across the way to check on the driver so clearly at fault. Reluctantly complying with her demands, he couldn't shake the feeling something was terribly off. Something he couldn't quite put his finger on. Turning his attention to the totaled car in front of him, Jane tugged on the door handle hoping against hope it would open. Not disappointed, he offered his hand to the pretty chestnut haired woman struggling to get her bearings.

Brushing his feelings aside, Jane helped the late twenty-something female out of her seat before making a moue of distaste at the overpowering scent of peaches and Tequila wafting off her person. The cause of the accident was abundantly clear as far as he was concerned. She'd ingested one or three too many of those delicious, but deadly, lunchtime Peach Mega Margaritas at the Mexican Restaurant down the road. The ones he and Lisbon always shared just one between them. Looking her over, Jane seriously doubted even Sweet Pea's family money could buy her pretty derriere out of the world of trouble she'd bought for herself in the blink of her baby blues.

Taking his clean handkerchief from his pocket, Jane pressed it into the woman's hand and raised her fingers to the bleeding abbrasion on the side of her head before guiding her over to the curb. Helping her sit down, Jane pulled his cell from his pocket. Dialing 911, he reported the accident and the fact there was a couple of Homeland Security Agents involved as well as the third victim. If nothing else, adding those tidbits would ensure both the Police and the Paramedics arrived in a timely manner.

Lifting his eyes from Kerry or Kelly or whatever name the young woman had mumbled, Jane suddenly saw what he hadn't registered in all the excitement. Harley's SUV was shooting out more than a few flames. Yelling across the way for Lisbon to "Run!," Jane saw the flames licking at the gas tank in an ominous manner and knew it was only a matter of time before the SUV blew. When that happened, he hoped to hell they weren't close enough to ignite the gas station. And while Lisbon was probably far enough away from the burning vehicle to be safe, if that station blew, all bets were off.

Understanding dawning on her face, Lisbon shoved Buck as hard as she could about the time the black SUV exploded in a mass of fire and smoke. Watching in horror, Jane saw both of the Agents lifted in the air and splatted onto the asphalt to roll a short distance away. Racing across the road, he stopped briefly to check Buck in passing to ensure the bleeding man still breathed before kneeling by Lisbon's side.

As bad as it looked, he knew neither of them had truly been caught in the blast. They'd been on the outer fringes but still close enough to be knocked off their feet. Watching the Fire Truck and Ambulances pulling up along with the SAC PD, Jane reassured himself that Lisbon, while unconscious, was still very much alive. Her chest was very obviously rising and falling and she was moaning faintly even if her eyes were still tightly shut. From the looks of the cut on her head, she had a nasty concussion to go along with the rest of her injuries. From the way she was breathing, he suspected she had at least one cracked rib and there was something strange about the angle of her right arm.

Seeing Lisbon's eyelids flicker briefly, Jane watched her fight her way back to consciousness.

"Jane?" Lisbon opened her eyes to find Jane's concerned face much too close to her own. "What the hell happened?"

Things were muzzier than they should be and she didn't like that. She didn't like it at all. Making to push into a sitting position, Lisbon wasn't happy to find Jane's hand firmly holding her down. Then again, maybe he was onto something. It seemed any serious movements on her part sent her universe into a nauseating tail spin of unbearable pain.

"Stay down." Jane sat on the asphalt beside her. "You got caught in the blast when that fire hit the gas tank."

Jane wasn't pleased by a single word exiting his mouth. Lisbon had ensured both of those idiots made it out of their car and to a degree of safety only to run out of time at the last moment. _She'd_ gotten caught in the tail end of the shock wave instead. Looking at his "Boss", he decided while bad enough, Lisbon could have gotten hurt a lot worse or even killed had she been a few seconds slower. He liked that thought even less than the fact she'd shielded Buck with her body when it should have been the other way around.

Jane decided he'd be glad for small blessings instead like the fact she didn't seem as badly injured as she could have been.

"Harley and Buck?" Lisbon ran her left hand over her face making a moue of distaste at the crimson staining the fingers she pulled away from her head.

Crap. She probably had a concussion from the looks of things. That cut felt pretty deep and that was a lot of blood on her hand.

"Over there." Jane nodded in the direction of the ambulance. "They're pretty banged up from the explosion more than the accident; but, I'd say they'll both be okay thanks to you."

"Good. That might make all of this worth it." Lisbon closed her eyes against the pain. "I think my right arm's broken."

She stated conversationally trying to ignore the agony radiating up her arm.

"I'd say that's a good guess." Jane agreed. "You probably have a few bruised ribs though the nice gentleman over there tending Buck doesn't seem to think they're broken. You have a wicked cut on your forehead that's going to need ten or twelve stitches, and you're going to be covered in bruises from head to toe. I'd say you won't be skipping around quite so enthusiastically by this time tomorrow."

She'd be knocked out on triple strength pain pills if he got his way.

"I'd say you're probably right and thanks for the catalog of boo-boos. It makes them hurt that much less." Lisbon would have slapped him if the act of doing so wouldn't make her scream like a girly-girl. "I need to get up. My injuries aren't that serious."

"You need to lie right where you are." Jane placed a restraining arm on her uninjured shoulder. "They'll be over here to load you into the ambulance in a minute or two. Chill until they bring the gurney over. Who knows? This might get you another long overdue commendation."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon fixed him with a glare.

"Think about it, Lisbon.

Bertram's going to love this. His cutest, sassiest, sexiest female Detective saved two robust Homeland Security Agents from certain death. No one's going to care the idiots put themselves in danger by driving too fast for conditions and getting hit by a car driven by an inebriated debutant who ran a red light trying to get home before her husband did.

All that matters is your diminuitive size and what you did. Harley and Buck are two big guys and you're just an itty, bitty little thing. That's going to look good for the CBI and another award will look good in your file around review time."

"Right beside all those black marks I have thanks to you." Lisbon leaned back and closed her eyes.

"You know, I'm really sorry about those." Jane said quietly as he patted her uninjured hand. "I never meant to hurt you."

"I know, Jane." Lisbon found comfort in the hand holding hers. "Things happen. Think they'll let you ride with me to the hospital?"

"I'll ask." Jane said knowing he would do just that to no avail. "But, don't get your hopes up. There isn't all that much room in that matchbox on wheels."

"I know; but, I don't really want to go alone." She hated being tied to a rolling bed inside of a moving box and Jane knew it.

"I'll be right behind you." Jane squeezed her hand as he watched the Paramedic's preparing to lift Lisbon onto the gurney. "And I'll go back with you if they'll let me."

"They'll let you if I ask them to." Lisbon said firmly watching Jane step into the back of the ambulance with her.

"I'm sure they will." Jane reassured her not knowing if they would or not; but, as he'd deal with that issue when it arose none of that mattered at the moment.

For now, all he cared about was getting Lisbon's injuries taken care of. As Harley and Buck were already in route, it was time to get their show on the road as well. Patting Lisbon's uninjured hand yet again, Jane exited the Emergency Vehicle. Nodding silently to the Paramedics, he watched the doors swing closed before heading for their SUV keys in hand.

When that ambulance pulled out of the drive, he would be right behind them exactly as he'd said.

#####

Walking into the ladies restroom, Lisbon stared at her reflection in the mirror one last time making sure there was no lipstick on her teeth and every hair was still in place. As for the predictable black suit, what could she say? That the narrow pin stripes matched her cobalt silk shell and the black cast cradling her lower arm wasn't all that distracting? All in all, she looked as good as she could after body kissing asphalt less than 48 hours ago.

Talk about bad timing. She had it in spades. Another minute or two and they'd have _all_ been out of explosion range.

Unfortunately, it hadn't happened that way. Jane was on the other side of the road aiding the driver who'd lost control of her vehicle and crossed the median after running the red light to cause the accident in the first place. Haley and Buck had escaped mostly unscathed all things considered thanks to her while she'd gotten royally smacked by the tail end of a gasoline blast. The last thing she remembered was being thrown off her feet by a massive shock wave before striking asphalt hard enough to see stars.

And, quite stupidly, her last coherent thought concerned Jane….

An indeterminate amount of time later, the initial darkness receded and her Mentalist's worried face came into focus.

The rest was history.

Taking her small makeup bag from her purse, Lisbon found the fancy pot Van Pelt had given her not five minutes ago. Flipping the lid, she gently dabbed a dot of the magic concealer the red head swore by on the nasty bruise beneath her right eye. The one still shining through her heavier than usual make-up. Lisbon silently prayed it would finally cover the discoloration as she wanted it to. Actually, the darkness marring her fair skin so visibly was more on the curve of her cheekbone than actually beneath her eye and the sucker hurt like hell to the touch. It and every other wicked bruise mapping the right side of her body where she'd landed after that blast.

Though she was hiding it well, Lisbon could hardly put one foot in front of the other. If anyone expected her to stay after Bertram's Spin Session they were in for a rude awakening. She already had a standing appointment with her nice, warm bed and a pain pill.

She'd see all her guys including Jane bright and early tomorrow morning.

She'd shoot the lot of them if they so much as thought about calling her in the interim.

Taking one last glance at the woman staring back at her, Lisbon decided she'd do in a pinch. She was undeniably badly bruised and battered no matter how hard she tried to disguise it. There was no denying her mouth was drawn with pain. Or that her eyes reflected most of the shock she still felt at how close she'd come to biting the dust yet again.

Not her best public face by any means; but, the Big Boss probably preferred she look this way: like she'd really been through something. It made her look more heroic. More like the not-so-cut little "pocket rocket" Jane had called her once and better never call her again.

What an ass.

Bertram, not Jane. She hated this whole "Meet the Press" bit. She wouldn't be doing it now if she had a choice. Unfortunately, Bertram felt differently. He so wasn't letting her off the hook. Not about this. Not when there was the "perfect opportunity" to make the CBI look good. Lisbon owed it to them. After all, she was getting that very public commendation Jane had mentioned in passing. Like she really cared when she should be home in bed.

She was stuck meeting Gale downstairs in fifteen instead.

They'd be on cameras in twenty she was sure.

Walking towards the elevator, Lisbon decided she needed to look at the upside. No one would have believed she'd been in the back of an ambulance two days ago. Or that she'd just been released from the hospital yesterday. Granted, it was only observation; but, still. She'd gotten caught in an explosion and had the broken bones to prove it. Only a cracked rib and a fractured radius…Right, she'd like to see Bertram hauling his butt out of bed for a Press Conference with the same injuries.

So not going to happen.

But, she had no one to blame for herself. If she didn't keep doing stupid things like checking out of the hospital against doctor's orders when she'd taken a bullet to the shoulder to check on Jane, the higher ups wouldn't keep thinking she was Superwoman. Note to self: She wasn't invincible so stop acting like she was.

That had been a couple of days ago. An ambulance had hauled her to the hospital where they'd kept her overnight for observation releasing her into Van Pelt's care around midday yesterday. She'd had her Agent drive her home and promptly kicked the red head out to lick her wounds in private. Unfortunately, she hadn't gotten off as easy as she'd hoped.

Bertram had called within the hour letting her know to be at work bright and early. She didn't have to stay more than a couple of hours; but, she did have to suck it up and make an appearance. As they had to strike while the iron was hot, there was a Q & A with the Press at ten o'clock the next day. The stream of cuss words leaving her mouth as she hung up the phone would have made Cho blush.

Speaking of wounds, there wasn't a lot she could do for the very visible cut near her temple. The one that hot Emergency Room doctor had taken twelve neat stitches in while flirting outrageously with her…It was a cut that was going to leave a nasty scar not easily hidden by her hair once it healed…The damnable thing was just what every girl needed….

Another Badge of Honor screaming "Cop" to the male population at large.

As if it wasn't hard enough to get an occasional date when she was married to the job and had a Jane to contend with. If being a SA of the Serious Crimes Unit at the CBI wasn't enough to give a man pause, tangling with her Mentalist was. Jane had managed to screw up her last four dates and chase off four different men on general principles simply by being Jane.

She wasn't quite sure she'd forgiven him for the last one yet. Even if said guy had turned out to be an off-the-chain, certifiably insane, A-1 Jerkosaurus Rex. Jane had still made an ass of himself, and by extension, of her. He'd done it in public no less. Note to self: Do not date attorneys whose butts you've whipped in Court at least once and never if you've done it several times.

No matter how many years may have passed between the last event.

Taking one last look and declaring herself done, Lisbon made for the door. If she hurried, she might make it to Bertram's side before the Press Conference began. If she didn't, she wouldn't hear the last of it. Steeling her back and taking a calming breath, Lisbon rounded the corner to step on the elevator. Pressing the "Down" button she focused on remaining serene. She had no reason to be nervous. She was the "heroine" of the story.

There was nothing to be concerned about.

Not until they started asking about Jane.

#####

Returning from lunch, Van Pelt led the way into the bullpen. The Press Conference had gone better than planned. Bertram had shot the bull with the best of them and Lisbon had comported herself with the dignity befitting a Senior Agent heading the Serious Crimes Unit at the CBI. And, battered or not, she'd looked quite lovely getting her Commendation for all of Sacramento to see.

After that, the pain pill Jane managed to slip into Lisbon's coffee had taken the edge off enough she'd found the idea of a celebratory lunch on her Mentalist's dollar tolerable. An hour and a half later the plan was to grab a file or two to work on at home before Van Pelt drove her home. Lisbon had no intention of leaving her bed for the next couple of days. Fortunately, her team supported her plans including Jane which meant he was going to stay as far away from her door as possible until she returned to work. That included not calling her unless she called him first.

"What's that?" Grace asked as she caught the flash of orange covering the end of Cho's desk as she turned her computer on.

"Don't look at me." Cho reached for the card attached to the bouquet of brightly colored roses knowing darned well those buds weren't for him. "They're for the Boss."

He'd see that she got them once Lisbon unlocked her office door.

"From who?" Rigsby asked clearly confused.

As far as he knew, Lisbon wasn't dating anyone. Or, if she was, she wasn't talking. Which wasn't anything new as the Boss didn't discuss her private life. Not with her team. She could be doing Jane and they wouldn't know it. Not that they thought she was or she would. That was just a random illustration popping into his head. Not to mention way too out there. The Boss had more common sense than to ever see Jane on the sly or otherwise.

Speaking of Jane…Rigsby glanced towards the couch with questioning eyes somewhat surprised when the Mentalist only shrugged his shoulders. While he didn't really expect the man to own up to sending Lisbon flowers, he did expect him to have an inkling of who actually had.

It was an undisputed fact the man knew everything, right?

"Don't look at me." Jane said. "I bought Lisbon's lunch…I didn't buy her flowers."

The Boss had relented on the going straight home long enough to join them for a decadent lunch. Jane had done some kind of hokey carney thing that had helped with the pain along with whatever else he'd slipped in her drink. While Rigsby would swear he'd hypnotized his Boss, he would vocalize no such thing. Lisbon had made it clear a long time ago there would be no mesmerizing of her person.

Oh, except that time with Dr. Carmen. That was the one time she'd given her permission anyways. Personally, Rigsby wasn't sure he hadn't done it a time or two without her consent. He so wasn't going there. He'd think about their lunch instead. They'd gone to one of those fancy Japanese places on Jane's dollar for a change. Everyone had thoroughly enjoyed themselves including the Boss.

Now, Lisbon was going home. Or she would be once she came out of her office after checking her messages. Oh, she was already out. In fact, she'd slipped into the bullpen when he wasn't looking or when he'd been preoccupied with his thoughts most likely.

"Grace, I'm ready to go." Lisbon said quietly.

"Let me find my keys." Van Pelt said as she reached in her desk drawer to grab her purse.

"Something we need to know, Cho?" Lisbon asked catching sight of the bouquet.

"Those aren't mine." Cho said as he erased a message on his phone.

"Whose are they?" Lisbon asked curiously. "Van Pelt is there something we should know about?"

"They're not mine, Boss." Van Pelt said as she walked over to lift the bouquet and offer them to Lisbon. "They're yours. They came while we were at lunch. Your office was locked so they left them on Cho's desk instead."

"What does the card say?" Lisbon asked curiously as she knew darned well those flowers weren't from any of those four last dates.

They hadn't parted on any kind of terms where those men would be interested in extending olive branches.

"Teresa Lisbon." Van Pelt said.

"That's all?" Lisbon asked more puzzled than flattered. "They're lovely; but, what the hell? Jane, is this your doing?"

"I assure you it is not, My Dear, though seeing the look on your face makes me wish it was." Jane said honestly.

"Right." Lisbon said dismissively. "Whatever."

She still wasn't sure this wasn't one of Jane's twisted mind games.

"Lisbon, if there were twenty five roses I'd say it was a fragrant congratulations on your commendation." Jane said as he rose to his feet to join the team at Cho's desk. "Since there's only thirteen roses, I'd say you have a Secret Admirer instead."

"Don't be ridiculous." Lisbon cut her eyes dismissively in Jane's direction as she leaned over to smell a plush orange blossom enjoying the unexpected citrusy fragrance and hiding her betraying blush. "What makes you think I have a secret admirer?"

"Floriography 101." Jane reached out to take the plain white card bearing nothing more revealing than Lisbon's name written in beautifully flowing calligraphy obviously penned by a feminine hand. "The only other thing I can tell you for sure is we won't get any information from the florist. The order was placed anonymously and paid for in cash to that intent. Even if we got video feed, his or her face would somehow be distorted or hidden beneath a hat. As for the card, it was written by a female employee according to the purchaser's instructions and the flowers were hand delivered while Lisbon was giving that press conference with Bertram by their standard delivery person."

"You know that how?" Lisbon asked again deciding she could get used to having fresh cut flowers in her office every day.

Maybe Jane had had wrong all these years. The way to her heart really wasn't through her stomach. Rather unexpectedly, she was finding a bouquet of roses trumped a Red Delicious any day.

"It's what I would do." Jane said quietly. "It's not what I did in this instance; but, it's exactly how I would do it if I had."

Glancing briefly at Jane and deciding there was something off about his tone, Lisbon agreed he was probably speaking the truth. If he ever decided to send someone flowers, he'd probably do it sneaky like this. In fact, she was sure he would. Cunning and devious were Jane's middle names.

"Why orange?" Lisbon turned to face Jane asking the only thing really bothering her. "Why not red?"

A part of her kept whispering those roses should be red.

Guys sent _red_ roses, not orange.

That's just the way it was done.

"Again, Floriography 101." Jane corrected her. "He's not saying, "I love you." He's conveying he finds you fascinating. ..Unless, of course, he's actually saying he finds you desirable instead. I certainly hope not. Such forwardness is a little creepy at this stage of the game don't you think?"

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon's tone clearly conveyed she wasn't in the mood for his foolishness.

"Hey, don't look at me." Jane held up his hands. "I assure all of you that I did not send those flowers nor did anyone else in this room from the looks on your faces. You didn't send those roses to yourself did you, Lisbon?" Jane smiled at the murderous expression in Lisbon's eyes. "Then it appears you _do_ have a secret admirer, Senior Agent T. Lisbon."

Jane said again as he meandered towards the break room and that imaginary cup of tea that wouldn't be so imaginary in a few moments.

He wasn't at all surprised to see Lisbon make her exit a few moments later with Van Pelt in tow. Returning her good bye wave with a wave of his own, Jane watched the two women enter the elevator carrying Lisbon's bag and those gorgeous flowers. Watching that bouquet disappear behind closing elevator doors: Jane wasn't sure how he felt about this newest development beyond he didn't like it.

He didn't like it at all.

He'd thought he'd done a pretty thorough job of getting rid of those last four Bozos Lisbon had gone to dinner with. None of them had asked for a second date which was a good thing. As sad as it was to say, the woman had lousy taste in men. She really did. Not a one of them had been good enough for her and she'd been too blind to see it. But, he had, and he'd taken care of the problem for her.

Or so he'd believed.

If those roses were any indication, he'd not done nearly as good a job as he'd thought he had.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I still don't have a whole lot of clarity to add to the summary beyond saying this story will have an angsty bent. So, what else is new?

Welcome to the twisted mind of Calladragon.

#####

Biting her tongue to keep from humming loud enough to drown the monotony, Lisbon forced herself to remain seated straight and still when all she truly wanted to do was wriggle about like am adolescent school girl summoned to the Principal's office. That was how she felt. Like she'd been a very naughty girl, and not in a good way, so now she was paying for it. It wasn't a pleasant feeling or one she was fond of.

Turning her attention back to LaRoche, Lisbon didn't try to stop herself from imagining his initials drawn in huge letters in the middle of his forehead with navy blue permanent marker. It was all she could do not to grin at the vision in her head. Giving herself an imaginary smack on the hand with an imaginary ruler like Sister Mary Katherine used to do, Lisbon decided she really had to get a grip on her imaginary ADD. She was acting worse than Jane at the moment. So not a good thing.

Not when she and Rigsby were both a hair's breadth away from a suspension neither of them could afford to have.

Getting her deviant thoughts under tight rein, Lisbon focused her attention back where it needed to be: hanging on LaRoche and his every word.

"Agent Lisbon, while I realize Agent Rigsby's actions weren't intentional…." LaRoche droned on annoyingly even if he was speaking the uncontested truth.

No one ever wanted to lose it at a crime scene and her team usually didn't. Not even when one of the victim's family members was an unrepentant jerk openly asking for it. This time the crime had been a too heinous and the brother's words too insensitive for Wayne to take. Cho had had a hard time restraining his friend from taking that first punch. Though he hadn't laid a hand on the Sanderson kid in the end, he'd _said_ more than enough to get a formal complaint lodged against him.

And her by association since she'd been present at the crime scene at the time.

Personally, Lisbon would have preferred it if Rigsby had beaten the ever living poop out of the ungrateful twerp. At least it would have made the situation worth the grief she was currently enduring. Being born with a silver spoon in his mouth didn't give man a right to speak about his dead sister like that. Yeah, maybe the girl had lived a risky lifestyle. But, she'd been living it among her peers the way they all did.

No one would have given her actions a second thought if she hadn't gotten killed.

As for Karina herself, she'd never once thought there was any danger in casually hooking up with people she'd known all of her life. Men she'd gone to school with or knew well socially. Most of their whole clique was doing exactly the same. They had been for years. Unfortunately, the twenty year old debutant turned college student never realized one of the men, or boys, she was sleeping with was going to leave her brutally raped, beaten, and insultingly posed by the side of the road like so much discarded refuse waiting to be found by Sacramento Road Maintenance workers out to do a random clean up for the first time in several weeks.

That was what had sent Rigsby so far over the edge. The fact the young woman had clearly known her assailant. That she was most likely in the midst of consentual intimacy with him when things had turned dark and deadly. Hearing her brother say none of them were surprised the little whore had come to such a bad end snapped the last of his formidable self-control. It didn't matter the twenty-something grad student was speaking from shock, anger, and pain. The words tumbling out of his mouth had almost gotten him a large fist to the face.

Lisbon really wasn't all that surprised. Even Jane had been visibly shaken by what he'd seen. Her, not so much, she was of sterner mettle than most of her team with the exception of Cho. For one thing, she'd seen a lot more. She'd never been to war. But, she'd handled a number of rough cases when she'd been with the SAC PD.

Pretending to listen to LaRoche, Lisbon decided she knew the perfect way to end a lousy day. Once it was finally over. If it ever was.

She was going to call that really good Italian Restaurant on the way home and order a huge salad, breadsticks, and a large Tuscan sausage and bean soup along with a large order of their classic Lasagna. She was also going to open that nice bottle of Chianti Tommy had given he'd gotten from one of his clients. While she didn't drink all that often or all that much when she did, her brother drank even less than she did sticking to an occasional beer.

Nodding her head appropriately while giving a good impression of actually listening, Lisbon decided what she didn't eat of the breadsticks and lasagna tonight would all freeze well enough to defrost at a later date. The soup she could bring for lunch tomorrow along with whatever was left of that monster slice of chocolate caramel cake she knew she was ordering. Actually, she'd probably be freezing half of that slice of cake as well.

After that, she was going to take her glass of wine upstairs and leave it on the lavatory sink while she set out her favorite candles, lit them, and ran a nice hot bath. While the hot water was running she was going to upend a couple of generous caps of her favorite cinnamon bubble bath under the faucet. The one smelling reminiscent of her favorite hot cinnamon candies that Jane like so well. He tended to sniff her much too closely the morning after the evenings she indulged in a nice, long soak. That she kind of liked being sniffed would remain her guilty secret.

Not that she got to soak that often.

While her tub was filling, she was going to dig out that angsty Historical Romance she'd abandoned a couple of months ago when her caseload got to be too much. The novel set in the 12th century, not the 16th, though that one was pretty good, too. The one making her believe someone, somewhere, was getting laid that wasn't her…even if only in fantasy land.

After that, she was turning her cell phone off. To hell with being "On Call" for a couple of hours for a change. If something serious went down, Cho would reach her on the land line. Her Number One knew if he couldn't reach her on one, he could definitely reach her on the other.

In the interim, she was carrying that novel into her bathroom and laying it beside her glass of wine while she twisted her hair on top of her hair and stripped naked as the day she was born. Then, she was taking that book along with her bath tub pillow and sinking up to her chin in frothy, fragrant, steamy water for as long as she could get away with it or until she turned into a wrinkled prune. Whichever came first.

Blinking, Lisbon focused her full attention back on LaRoche sensing he was fast winding down. It wouldn't do to be caught daydreaming when she should be listening. Not by J.J. LaRoche and not when he could make her life a living hell.

"None of this can happen again, Agent Lisbon. As the Senior Agent, insuring your team's actions are in line is your responsibility as you already know. I'm afraid I must insist that you promise me such a thing won't happen again. We might not be able to smooth things over quite so satisfactorily if there is a next time." LaRoche said as he watched Lisbon rise to her feet. "Unfortunately, while I'm aware it isn't always possible with Jane, I know you are fully capable of handling the rest of your team."

"Yes, Sir, I am." Lisbon reassured him as she walked out the door glad their rambling conversation had finally come to an end.

She was going to have a one-on-one with each of her team members to assure this never happened again. While fully capable of handling a dressing down, there was always something extra creepy about meeting with LaRoche behind closed doors that she couldn't quite put her finger on. Maybe it was the nature of his job or the fact she'd always felt he saw and knew far more than he let on. Whatever it was, it would take her a while to get back to normal after spending longer than she wanted in his presence.

Walking down the hall, Lisbon stopped by the ladies room to apply a dab of lip gloss and use the facilities before making her way to her office. Taking her key from her suit jacket pocket, Lisbon honestly didn't expect her sanctuary to have remained unbreached. A certain someone had been skulking about in full Jane mode long before she'd left for LaRoche's offce. She'd noted he was already in the kitchen putting the final touches on that familiar cup of tea as she passed on the way to J.J.'s abode.

Cursing softly under her breath, Lisbon unlocked her door fully expecting to find a Red Delicious sitting in the middle of her desk as a peace offering that would never have been necessary in the first place if Jane hadn't gone where he wasn't supposed to go. While she appreciated the gesture, she did not appreciate Jane's constant need to remind her how easily he could invade her personal space at will. He'd been doing that much too well for way too many years and, frankly, it was growing old.

At least for the moment as she'd just spent the last hour in LaRoche's office trying to literally scrape the proverbial pile of crap Rigsby had pushed her into off the bottom of her figurative shoe. It hadn't been easy as it had involved more than Wayne's run-in with that punk. Somehow, through flattery and acquiescence, and far more judicious ass kissing than she liked to do, she'd managed to keep them both from getting another black mark in their files.

Or, more accurately, Jane had thanks to that very strange love-hate relationship he and LaRoche had when he'd casually meandered into the midst of their conversation out of the blue and shown her precisely how it should be done.

As if she needed another reason to be grateful to that louse. He hadn't done that much really. Just said a few words then disappeared as he always did leaving LaRoche to mull his words while Lisbon finished arguing her case. In the end, she preferred to think her defense had carried more weight than Jane's opinion in LaRoche's final decision.

Tossing her suit jacket on the back of her chair, Lisbon stopped dead in her tracks noting what had unbelievably failed to capture her attention upon walking through the door.

There sitting smack in the middle of her desk was an extravagantly wrapped, elegantly beribboned, triple boxed tower from the bakery down the block and across the street giving off the most divine fragrances she'd ever inhaled. Reaching out to open the small card attached to the bow, Lisbon saw her name in an artistic script and nothing else. Feeling her heart beat accelerate and deciding she didn't know what else to do as her Secret Admirer had obviously struck again, Lisbon reached out to tentatively slip the crimson bow from the boxes before carefully unwrapping the smallest, topmost box. Removing the lid, she smiled at the daintily authentic Bourbon Pecan Tassies that were much too sweet to nibble more than a two or three at a time. Reaching for the second box, her eyes grew wide at the sight of her favorite cherry cheesecake brownie bars that Jane hadn't brought her in a coon's age. Deciding she liked the way his mind worked since he was buying her all her favorite things, Lisbon opened the third box to expose a dozen freshly prepared pastries comprised of Cinnamon Rolls, Bear Claws, Iced Lemon Scones, and Apple Fritters.

Catching Jane lingering nosily around the parameter of her open office door, Lisbon bid him enter before turning confused eyes toward her Mentalist.

"Honestly, Jane." She'd had enough. She truly had. While the flowers and treats were nice, it was time to stop. And while she knew he was frustrated at not getting any closer to Red John; she wasn't willing to be his latest diversion. "Don't you ever get tired of playing games?"

"Don't look at me, Lisbon." Jane threw his hands up in resignation. "I assured you a few weeks ago that I'm not your Secret Admirer and I'm not."

He was also no closer to discovering his real identity than he had been back then. That's assuming "he" was actually even a "him". For all they knew, Lisbon's unknown friend could be female. Somehow, Jane doubted that. Those perfect roses and the fancy, beribboned boxes wrapping her favorite sweets had a definite masculine aura about them. One that said, whoever he was, that he meant business…Whatever that business might actually be.

As long as it wasn't _monkey_ business, he might be okay with it.

The jury was still out on that one. Jane rather liked the guy's style as he was neither chintzy nor predictably trite. However, if it was sexual shenanigans he was plotting, all bets were off. It wouldn't matter he'd taken the time to discover Lisbon's special delights. And there'd better not be any jewelry coming down the pipe either.

When that happened, Jane _would_ find him and kick him out of Lisbon's life before he ever got into it. He'd do it or he'd die trying. If there was one thing Patrick Jane knew, it was that he wasn't ready to die.

"Do you think they're okay to eat?" Lisbon asked tentatively lifting a decadently warm, golden fried Apple Fritter to her nose before taking a satisfactory whiff of cinnamony sugar glazed heaven.

"Considering they were just hand delivered from that high brow bakery down the street still warm from the oven, I'd say they're perfectly fine." Jane said recognizing the delivery boy as the owner's son as he frequented the place on a regular basis to purchase those deadly cherry cheesecake brownies Lisbon liked so well. Or he used to before he'd gotten distracted by other things. Maybe he should start up again. "If you have any doubts, feed Rigsby one of the Bear Claws. We'll know soon enough if something's wrong. I doubt the rest of your treats would even have time to get cold."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon said holding out the box. "Here, Rigsby, have a Bear Claw."

Watching Rigsby stare hesitantly at the artery clogging treats with undisguised desire, Lisbon laughed before taking a huge bite of her Apple Fritter and closing her eyes in ecstasy. If it wouldn't be so disgusting and unprofessional, she'd gladly moan her pleasure aloud. There was nothing she liked more than a delicious pastry accompanied by a strong cup of coffee like the one Jane was currently pressing into her palm.

Staring at her with mirthful eyes, Lisbon had a feeling Jane was reading her every unrestrained thought. If she had any doubts, his next words confirmed it. Thank goodness they were rasped for her ears only through lips that were much too close to her skin.

"Who knew you found eating such a sensual experience." Jane's expression let her know she was so busted and he _was_ reading her every thought.

That he might even be wondering what other experiences she approached in a similar manner.

"The fritters are really good." Lisbon said innocently as she licked a sticky gob of icing off her finger. "You should try one."

"I might do that some time." Jane said in a tone that had Lisbon's over active imagination kicking into overdrive in wildly inappropriate ways before heading for the kitchen to finish the cup of tea he'd left steeping while he brought his "Boss" her cup of coffee instead.

Watching him leave, Lisbon decided things had gotten _unusual_ since she'd started receiving gifts from her unknown benefactor. He wasn't sending them all that regularly either. Just every time her team solved a newsworthy case which seemed about every four to six weeks lately. The near regularity was noticeably starting to put Jane's nose out of joint.

As far as Lisbon was concerned, she couldn't take this imaginary relationship seriously although she did appreciate his tastes. They seemed to be very similar to her own which both flattered and alarmed her to a degree. Maybe alarmed was too strong a word for her feelings. It made her feel like her Secret Admirer was someone she worked with closely enough that he'd had opportunity to observe her more intimate habits on a casual basis.

Lisbon wasn't sure how she felt about that. She really wasn't.

Jane clearly didn't like it. Not that she'd expect anything else. The man had sabotaged her last four dates. She'd have literally killed him for that one if the guys hadn't turned out to be such losers in the first place. Not that she thought he had a right to meddle.

But, Jane was going to be Jane and there wasn't anything she could do about it.

She'd learned that lesson the hard way a long time ago.

#####

Looking around her bathroom, Lisbon couldn't believe she'd managed to escape the CBI at a decent hour as she'd hoped. Nor could she believe she'd actually followed through on the plans she'd made for the evening. She'd called the Italian Restaurant as she'd walked out the door and picked up her order on the way home. She'd even managed a leisurely, uninterrupted meal of soup, salad, and lasagna accompanied by a half glass of Chianti.

As she'd only had that couple of bites of Apple Fritter since her hastily devoured breakfast of two scrambled eggs and a slice of toast early this morning, she'd found her more substantial dinner very satisfactory. As often happened, she'd been forced to skip lunch thanks to her meeting with LaRoche which had come soon after she'd returned from the field on their latest case. The very one that had gotten both her and Rigsby in trouble. In fact, she'd enjoyed her lasagna when she'd finally gotten around to it so much she'd forgone that nibble or two of chocolate cake in favor of ambling upstairs to prepare that bath.

Arranging the last of her candles in its usual spot, Lisbon carefully lit each one before turning on the faucet and adding her bubble bath. Placing her favorite CD in the player, Lisbon walked into her bedroom to remove her clothes. Hanging her blouse and pants in the closet beside her jacket, she walked back into her bathroom to pile her hair on top of her head. Removing her lingerie, she tossed her serviceable bra and panties into the hamper before walking over to turn off the water and test the temperature.

Deciding it was comfortably hot without being scalding; Lisbon slipped into the water and arranged her pillow behind her head. If felt good to be soaking away the day. Between the intermittent "appearances" of her Secret Admirer and Jane acting like a jealous suitor which _everyone_ knew he wasn't, she'd had an exhausting day without the case and LaRoche. Add that in and she was truly ready for a relaxing hour or so surround by the moist heat of the water lapping against her skin.

Thinking about her Secret Admirer, Lisbon was torn between a desire to discover who he was and her desire to never find out. There was a certain mystique about their dance that would disappear the moment she learned his identity. On the one hand, the greater part of her thought "he" was actually Jane playing mind games. If it was, she knew better than to think he was up to anything more serious than trying to dispel his boredom and using her to do it. The whole scene would truly be much ado about nothing.

On the other, there were certain things that pointed to her Secret Admirer being anyone but Jane. For one thing, his gifts coincided with her most recent News Conferences of which she'd given two in the last six weeks. The first was when she'd gotten injured pulling Haley and Buck from that burning car and received her Commendation. He'd sent those lovely roses she'd kept in her office for several days in response.

The second was when she'd found the Mayor's wife still alive in that hunting shack after she'd been taken in a car-jacking gone bad that left everyone believing she was dead. But, that one had been all Jane even though she'd gotten the credit. He was the only one who'd believe Lorraine was still alive given the amount of blood at the scene. And she was. She was badly injured; but, still alive which was all that truly mattered in the end. Lisbon had gotten a different Commendation for that one. One she didn't feel she deserved. But, as it looked good for the Bureau, Bertram had convinced her to accept it. That had been late yesterday afternoon and the pastries had arrived mid-day today.

Lisbon couldn't help thinking, if her Secret Admirer was really Jane playing Mentalist head games, he wouldn't wait around to see her face on the television screen to act. He'd be leaving his offerings strewn about randomly and far closer together so she didn't miss his point. Or, if he was being sneaky, he'd do exactly what this guy was doing to throw her off her game.

Jeez, she honestly didn't know. If her Secret Admirer turned out to be Jane, she'd brain him. If it wasn't, she'd figure out that one when the time came. A lot would depend on who he turned out to be. Whether he was a guy she'd consider going out with or someone who made her want to run. That thought bothered her some. He might turn out to be a real creeper then what was she supposed to do.?

Dismissing her mildly disturbing thoughts, Lisbon wallowed out a more comfortable spot on her waterproof pillow and flipped open her novel. She didn't want to waste any more time thinking about murderers, Secret Admirers, LaRoche or her team. She especially didn't want to think about one Patrick Jane.

She'd had her fill of the lot of them for a while.

She'd much rather fantasize about taking Alexandria's place with the Sheriff of Lothian. She'd decided a long time ago he was an oversized hunk of man flesh any red blooded woman with half a libido would like to get her hands on. She certainly would. He had all the right requirements…He was tall, smart, strong, and striking to look at. If that wasn't enough, he'd definitely get the law enforcement gig. And she doubted he'd be intimidated by a woman packing heat even if he'd never seen a gun…What more could a girl ask for?

Smiling at the ridiculousness of her thoughts, Lisbon took a sip of wine and turned the page quickly losing herself in the twisted tale of a desperate woman out to literally capture the man of her dreams.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: There's going to be one, maybe two, chapters more before I hit the brick wall in the creative process on this story that says I have to figure out which direction I need to go…then we'll go to that one update a week thing. I'm afraid this story has a mind of its own again. That happens a lot with me. I think we're going to zig one way and we end up zagging another. ~Calla

#####

Glancing at the attractive man hanging on Bertram's every word, Lisbon glanced at her Boss instead of huffing. Suddenly appearing two weeks ago as the _Interim_ candidate filling Wainwright's vacant position, Lisbon hadn't believed her eyes. Sending up yet another silent prayer, she hoped this still wet-behind-the-ears schoolboy wasn't here very long and that he _never_ inherited Luther's chair. Not _permanently_. From what she'd seen so far, she could barely tolerate the dirty blonde Lothario as her Intermediate Boss much less anything more. To be honest, Rodney MacTavish's bumblings made Wainwright seem like a real cop.

It was beyond comprehension how these desk jockeys kept getting promoted into a leadership position requiring the skills of a seasoned field agent which they obviously weren't. If she was honest, experienced leadership was something they hadn't had since Madeleine Hightower. As difficult as their old boss could be at times, if they couldn't have Minelli, she'd been the next best thing. If there was good one thing Lisbon could say for her, the woman had been fearless in the face of challenge and she never hesitated to back her mouth with action. Both were traits she respected.

Amazingly, in spite of everything that had happened since Virgil's retirement, her Unit had survived and thrived. Not without a few expected, and unexpected, dings; but, that was the nature of the CBI. They'd even managed to do their job well enough to maintain their impressive solve rate which hadn't been easy. The same record never topped in a decade of trying. However, keeping Jane on the straight and narrow when he preferred the weaving path of Red John tracking was a full time job in itself. Between her and Cho, they did a respectable job of playing herder to his errant sheep.

So, in her humble opinion, they could survive on their own a few more months until a worthy candidate was found. They'd done fine so far. Why try to slap a bandage on the open wound? It would only unravel down the road leaving a bigger mess than before as it always did. Sometimes, she just didn't get the bureaucrats or bureaucracy. She just didn't get it.

Turning her attention back to the conversation at hand, Lisbon caught Bertram's eye and knew he knew her mind had been wandering. That was a real "Oops!" moment under the circumstance. Clearly, it was time for some much needed damage control.

"Sir, I fully understand what I'm up against." Lisbon said as she quickly organized her thoughts preparing to eloquently defend herself.

Bertram's look clearly said, "Then why don't you tell me so we'll both know."

Taking a deep breath, Lisbon could already see it fast becoming a long day and it had only just begun.

#####

Waving at security, Lisbon entered the CBI parking lot and turned left. Pulling into a vacant space she rested her head on the steering wheel. It wasn't even ten o'clock. Her day was already a doozy and she had yet to see Jane. She doubted she'd do that any time soon. By this time, he was already sequestered in his Bat Cave mired deep into the darkness. He wouldn't come out except to make a cup of tea unless they caught a case and she forced the issue.

Honestly, she was seriously concerned for the man. What else was new?

Sliding off the seat, Lisbon grabbed her bag and headed for the door. Once she looked over the case, got an update from her team, and decided their next move, it should be pretty close to lunch time. She thought she might slip away to the firing range for a little stress relief. As she had to Requalify soon, the practice was justified. Not that she was worried. It was a well known fact Teresa Lisbon was one of the best shots at the CBI.

It was a long acknowledge fact as well that once that handgun was drawn she a was stone cold, Steady Eddie until the threat was neutralized.

It was one of the things garnering her so much respect among the law enforcement officers who'd worked with her over the years. The reality if Lisbon had your back, she had your back. That and the way she handled Jane. Not that anyone could handle the monster in the deceptively attractive packaging all of the time. But, Lisbon did it better than anyone. That was saying a lot and it was worth a healthy dose of respect.

"Good morning, Henry." Lisbon greeted the familiar Security Guard in passing before heading for the elevator.

Watching the doors slide shut, she felt both a sense of excitement and dread brewing in the pit of her stomach. She'd made the news yet again thanks to Jane. Smile curving her lips, Lisbon wondered how darn many times the man was going to walk into the midst of a bank robbery in one lifetime? Especially considering their paychecks were Direct Deposit? They hardly ever went to banks except for Crimes In Progress. But they had two days ago.

Jane had to deposit his winnings from an illicit poker game. Considering it was a fairly hefty amount, a good twenty grand, he had to be playing with some pretty high rollers. She wisely hadn't asked any questions and he hadn't given any answers. She honestly didn't want to know.

Anyways, they'd walked right in the middle of a bank robbery. Rather Jane had and she'd had to rescue him. Going against the rules, she hadn't waited for back up. Simply taken the perfect opportunity the idiots gave her to disarm both of them with a couple of well aimed shots. The rest was history.

Well, history and the evening news. Bertram had been pleased with that one. It looked good for the CBI even if she hadn't played it by the book. At least it was one thing he was pleased about. He hadn't been all that happy with her this morning. Even if he'd had to acknowledge by the end that she was exactly right…Especially since he'd had to do that.

Rounding the corner, Lisbon glanced over at the bullpen to see her team working earnestly. Deciding not to disturb them until she'd looked over the latest updates to the case files, she swung by the break room to make a cup of coffee instead. Carrying her coffee to her office, Lisbon removed the key from her pocket and unlocked the door.

She didn't know why she bothered. The main culprit she was trying to keep out had absolutely no difficulty getting in without a key. Her actions honestly didn't make sense. It was more a case of going through the motions after all of these years than anything else.

Stepping inside, Lisbon stared at the beribboned basket cradling what she immediately recognized as a very expensive bottle of Anejos Tequila flanked by two Tequila Glasses sitting on her desk. Blinking at the sight; the question, 'Who knew there was any such thing as Tequila glasses?" immediately flickered through her mind. The lightening fast answer, "Probably Jane." soon followed provided by the peanut gallery in her brain.

Lifting the bottle, Lisbon realized it was the smoother, costlier Anejo of Bosco's favorite brand. It was also much too similar to the one he'd pulled from his desk drawer along with two crystal brandy snifters clearly brought from home on a bleak winter's night long ago…Her last night before she'd assumed her new position as Senior Agent within the CBI in her own right…The promising promotion no longer quiet so promising anymore as she'd let Jane thoroughly trash it over the years…It was a night long ago when she'd learned some Tequila's weren't meant to be crudely tossed back in exuberant case closed celebration; but, sipped like a fine champagne while the complexity of their flavors were savored on the tongue.

It was also the night, as they sat sipping Tequila into the wee hours of the morning, when she'd been slapped upside the head with the reality Bosco's feeling for her ran far deeper than they should for a married man. And that her own, while nothing like the emotion she saw reflected in his eyes, weren't quite as innocent as she'd always believed.

She'd not understood what had suddenly changed. Why she was seeing things she never wanted to see and feeling things she never wanted to feel. Probably because it had been too long since she'd been in a relationship. Since she hadn't been feeling vulnerable and lonely in ways she didn't usually feel. It had taken a tipsy, forbidden almost kiss that never really happened to prove that dangerous point. Lisbon had decided, at that precise moment, her sudden career move couldn't have come at a better time.

She needed to put some distance between her and her "Boss" before she stepped into her future after mistakenly creating a past she never wanted to happen.

Thankfully, she hadn't looked back in the years since.

Not even when she and Bosco had suddenly found themselves working much too close together for her peace of mind. Or when he'd made it abundantly clear to anyone willing to see that his feelings had never changed. The he still loved his student in ways he shouldn't. If Lisbon doubted it, Jane had clarified the situation more than once refusing to let her ignore what was right in front of her face. If that weren't enough, the words she never wanted to hear had fallen from Sam's lips to her ears on the deathbed he should never have been in.

Shaking out of her reverie, Lisbon's emerald eyes suddenly filled with menace as a couple of realizations shot through her mind.

She'd been in strategy meetings with Bertram and her intermediate Boss all morning concerning a hypersensitive case they were working Number One. Her door had been locked the entire time Number Two. Number Three was just plain obvious: How had that basket gotten where it was given one and two? There was only one conclusion she could jump to and he had curly blonde hair. Her experience mind easily supplied the answers.

The same way those bakery boxes had gotten there.

As she'd had quite the heated something to say their Boy Wonder after the fact, Lisbon couldn't believe he was still up to his maddening antics.

Walking over to her door and throwing it open, she stuck her head out and yelled "Jane!" in that tone brooking no argument. Especially when she knew his lazy butt was reclining on his couch in the bull pen not locked away in his Man Cave upstairs. Or the "Bat Cave" as her team called it not meaning for one moment that Jane was a Super Hero. More like the man was a batty shadow crawler on a good day.

Rising to his feet, Jane ambled toward Lisbon's office wondering what he'd done now to warrant such a rude awakening from a perfectly good nap.

"You screeched, My Dear?" Jane asked with an impertinent quirk of his brow.

"Been picking my lock again?" Lisbon asked mirroring Jane's gesture with an impressive eyebrow lift of her own.

"I have not." Jane firmly denied. "If you don't believe me, asked Rigsby, Van Pelt, and Cho. They'll be happy to confirm my story."

"Yeah, I'll just bet they would." Lisbon said knowing her guys had "stuck up" for Jane more than once in the past and not putting it past them to do it again.

"I'm not lying, Lisbon." Jane said as he walked around her desk to peer into the large, hand woven basket. "That's a nice, smooth Tequila. Coupled with the Tequila Glasses, it set your admirer back a tidy sum.

However, your gifter made a mistake with those glasses. Anejos like that one are better appreciated in a snifter than a flute. More of the aromas and flavor elements are swirled apart in the larger glass instead of bound as they are in a flute. Trust me on this." Jane smirked at the obvious aggravation on Lisbon's face.

As if his letting a stranger into her office without her permission yet again wasn't enough; her resident freak had the audacity to critique her gift. Yeah, she frequently called Jane a "freak" in her mind…Usually when she was _so_ done with him. She'd called him a freak to his face a time or two as well. She meant it affectionately and Jane knew it…more of an impolite term of endearment than anything else.

Definitely not in that way that had her verbally going for the jugular with anyone else.

"It's no big deal as you already have a couple of snifters in your kitchen cabinet. Besides, none of that changes the fact someone went to a lot of trouble to get this to you. It's from a shop on the other side of Sacramento favored by the city's more elite constituency." Jane rattled on.

"How would you know that?" Lisbon asked.

"Lisbon, I've hobnobbed with the shakers and movers in this town quite a bit over the past decade." Jane said loftily. "I'm privy to quite a bit you don't know I know."

"Right." Lisbon said. "Mashburn turned you on to the shop."

Lisbon resisted the urge to mark a sizzling pretend "1" in the air at the look in Jane's eyes. It was about time she'd gotten him again. It had been much too long and he was getting too arrogant to live with. He needed bringing down a notch or two.

"Maybe he did." Jane acknowledged. "Catch you later, Lisbon. I have some work to do."

Watching him head for the door, Lisbon wasn't sure why she felt so compelled to make the offer; but, she did.

"Hey, Jane?" He stopped midstep without turning around fingers touching the doorknob.

"Yeah, Lisbon?" He asked.

"My place around eight." She offered. "We can order Mexican and try that Tequila. You can show me how it's done.

"Sounds like a plan." Jane walked out the door towards the much hated stairs.

Shaking her head, Lisbon had no clue why she'd made the offer other than she was really concerned about him. Jane was starting to look rough around the edges in that manner she despised. The one that said he was spending too much time wallowing in his personal hell.

Lifting the basket off her desk to the floor in an out of the way corner, Lisbon pulled her chair out and took a seat. Opening the first of several files, she banished thoughts of Jane and turned her attention where it should be.

On her several cases at hand.

#####

Finishing the last bite of her Chiles Rellenos, Lisobon sat back in her chair watching Jane sipping Tequilla from one of the snifters looking right at home on her couch. Glancing at the take out boxes still half filled with everything from nachos to quesadillas to everything in between, she decided they'd made veritable pigs of themselves with plenty left over for several more meals. Her slightly rounded belly was visible proof if she needed any.

There was something about Jane and takeout when it was just the two of them. He seemed compelled to order a sampling of all of her favorites. No matter the cuisine they were having. Not that she was complaining. As long as it was on his dollar, she didn't really care. It was just that she always gorged and there was always a lot of food left over. Far more than there would have been had they each simply ordered what they really wanted.

Fortunately, they usually cooked on those rare occasions they shared a meal which eliminated her need to double or triple her workouts for a few days to keep the extra pounds at bay.

If she was honest, she'd admit she enjoyed having someone fussing over her even if it was in such a seemingly trivial way. However, coming from Jane, the extra effort was far from insignificant. He didn't do nice things for people he didn't care about.

Catching Lisbon's eye, Jane lifted his glass in silent salute before uttering the words she'd never expect to pass his lips.

"To Bosco." Jane said quietly into the calm. "He meant what he said that last night, you know. He loved you, Teresa. Not loved you like a friend love either. He was in love with you. He had been for years."

"I don't want to talk about it, Jane." Lisbon said quietly as she set her empty plate aside.

"Why not?" Jane asked. "A part of you held him in great affection, too. Granted, not in the same way; but, more of that rookie way Van Pelt used to worship you. The man was your mentor and everything you aspired to be. At least until he did the unthinkable. That was when you decided there were parts of him you never wanted to be. That doesn't mean you didn't still hero worship him from afar in that innocent little heart of yours."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon growled forcefully not liking his choice of subject matter.

"Why?" Jane continued. "If I don't miss my guess, things almost came to a head at least once. Probably late one night after a harrowing case when you were both feeling raw and vulnerable. Maybe his wife was out of town and you were in between boyfriends as you always seem to be. You really must do something about that, Lisbon.

Married to the job is no way for a vibrant, attractive woman to be.

Back to what I was saying, you were probably sharing a case closed shot that foolishly turned into an unhealthy three or four. At least for you given your body weight, the speed with which you were knocking them back, and the fact you probably hadn't eaten all day. Old habits rarely change and you don't eat a lot on the cases that really get to you.

I'd say it wasn't long before you were feeling no pain and Bosco wasn't looking so bad. Personally, I can't imagine that. Then again, what do I know? I'm not female and that was a few years ago. Given that I think he always found you appealing, I'd say Sam was feeling the same.

I think he decided the time had come to make his move. I also think a smidge of that legendary "Saint Teresa" control slipped when Bosco finally got up the nerve to kiss you. You kissed him back. More than that, you thought about letting him do what he wanted to right there on his office couch." Jane blanched slightly at her murderous gaze. "But, you didn't. You were the agent under him and, more importantly, he was a married man. So, I'd say you beat a path out of there as fast as your tiny legs would go and all was discretely forgotten the next day.

Put down to too much stress and too many shots of Tequila.

While you may have eventually forgotten those little glimpses of something you didn't want to see, My Dear, Bosco never did."

Which was why she'd looked so genuinely startled when he'd told her Bosco was in love with her. She'd deliberately convinced herself it never happened. Even when a deeply buried part of her knew it had.

"I mean it, Jane." Lisbon tossed her balled up napkin at him hoping he would take the hint.

"That's not your fault, Teresa. You aren't an evil seductress or a home wrecker. You didn't make Bosco fall in love with you and I know for a fact you never encouraged him. Not in any overt way unless you count simply being Lisbon.

If it makes you feel any better, he never mistreated his wife and she never knew he was unfaithful in his heart. And he did love her. Never doubt that either.

He just loved you more." Jane finished softly.

"Stop it, Jane." Lisbon really did not want to be having this conversation.

As usual, Jane saw too much. While he might not be exactly right on the exact events, he was close enough. Sam _had_ tried to kiss her once under similar circumstances.

She'd artfully dodged his move leaving both their dignities intact. As for knowing he was in love with her, she'd never allowed herself to see it. What she didn't acknowledge wasn't there. Not until Jane forced her to.

As for her loving him a little, she'd never been in love with Bosco. That wasn't acceptable behavior. Who knows what would have happened under different circumstances…Had Sam not been both her superior and married…With hindsight, she doubted very much. While she hadn't loved him like _that_, she had cared deeply for the man. Sam Bosco was, and would have always been, a very "special" friend.

"No, Teresa, I don't think I will." Jane continued. "I'm tired of seeing that look in your eyes every time Bosco's name is mentioned or the devastation on your face when you saw that bottle of Tequila today. While it's not the same kind, it is the same brand Sam bought. Whoever he is, your Secret Admirer knows you much too well. However, that isn't what we're talking about at the moment.

You need to let what's inside out, Teresa. It's okay to mourn an old friend. It's even okay to love him if that's what you want to do. There's no one here but me and you and I assure you I won't tell. I certainly won't think any less of you for finally giving in."

Wrapping her in his arms, Jane rubbed her back soothingly as Lisbon gave into the jagged tears she'd refused to shed in quite this way.

"For the record, you are not blame for Bosco's death. He made his choices and he paid for them. Enough said." Jane said quietly.

"I hate you, Jane." Lisbon said emphatically from where she was tucked so neatly against his chest struggling to ignore the voice in her head reminding her over and over again how right this felt.

It didn't matter how _she_ felt. Jane was the one who mattered. As he obviously didn't feel the same so that little voice could shush already.

"No you don't, My Dear." Jane consoled her. "You hate being vulnerable in front of me. That's an entirely different matter."

"Fine." Lisbon pulled out of his arms unable to stand being so near him anymore. "What you said. I'll be back in a minute. I need to fix this."

She made a sweeping circle encompassing her tear wrecked face.

"I'll still be here." Jane reassured him as he crammed his hands in his pocket before ambling towards the French Doors leading to her patio to stare into the distance.

Waiting for Lisbon to return downstairs face restored, Jane pondered the past five months at the CBI. Nothing really changed year in and year out. Life was just more of the same. They were the Serious Crimes Unit and they handled serious crimes: murders, kidnappings, bombings, terrorism, and the blackmailing of people in high places. Mostly murders; but, he wasn't complaining…The search for Red John.

That's why he'd gotten involved with the Lisbon and the CBI in the first place.

What wasn't the same was _he'd_ appeared on the scene almost five months ago nearly to the day disrupting everything. Jane didn't like that. He didn't like it at all. Whoever, or whatever, he was it was clear nothing was as it seemed. He was sure it.

For one thing, he was taking much too long in his pursuit if his intent was amorous. Then again, he might be playing up the mystique factor. Lisbon might be a no-nonsense cop; but, she was still a woman. He'd occasionally caught that _look_ in her eyes when she'd had nothing better to do than fantasize about who Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome might possibly be.

For another, whoever he was, he knew Lisbon well enough to push all the right buttons. That made Jane uncomfortable. Where someone else (like Grace Van Pelt) would jump to the very logical conclusion her Secret Admirer was a co-worker, he wasn't so sure. And while the thought of someone who'd coveted Lisbon from afar suddenly deciding to crawl out of the wood work and make his move _was_ romantic in some lights, in others it was downright creepy. At the moment his Creep-O-Meter was winning out starting with the first gift.

In the first place, who sent Teresa Lisbon's flower to break the ice? A pound or two of expensive gourmet coffee made more sense to anyone really knowing her. The woman hadn't received a bouquet three times in the years he'd known her and every one of them had been an apology. She just wasn't a flowers kind of girl. Not on the surface anyway and not that she couldn't be. He'd noted the way her eyes lit up when she'd realized that vase was for her.

What really bugged him wasn't so much that someone had sent Lisbon flowers; it was the flowers themselves. Well, maybe that wasn't strictly true; but, he wasn't going there. Off the rabbit trail and back to the thought at hand…Those roses should have been red…That's what a real Secret Admirer would have sent. Some random Joe wouldn't be into Floriography. He'd just send the object of his desires what every other man pursuing a woman sent: a dozen or two of the classic standby. That was simply the way things were done.

Not this guy. He'd sent a very specific message by the flowers and number of stems he'd chosen. He'd very precisely conveyed what he wanted to say: "You have a Secret Admirer." and nothing else. Not your run of the mill love sick geek.

Not at all.

Then there was the matter of those sweets. Every last one was chosen with care as they were all Lisbon's favorites assembled in one delicious place. Given that a certain lady cop's tastes had changed over their acquaintanceship, her Admirer had to have been observing her closely to compile such a complete offering that would appeal to her every mood.

Any way you sliced that one, it had stalker written all over it.

Finally, there was his last offering: the one sending Lisbon over the edge. Sam Bosco's favorite brand of Tequila wasn't common knowledge. Nor was their little ceremony the night before Lisbon stepped into her promotion. Someone, somewhere, had to have heard them reminiscing about it sometime when Lisbon was shooting the breeze in Bosco's office. Probably late some night when everyone had gone home soon after they'd started working closely together again. It sounded like a very Lisbon thing to do…Especially with an old friend the caliber of Sam.

Jane would double down that someone had had short dark hair embellished with totally age _inappropriate_ hair ornaments.

All in all, this whole Secret Admirer situation had him on edge for reasons he couldn't quite put his finger on. On the one hand, he was going to feel like a fool when Dwyer from Forensics Accounting stepped forward to invite Lisbon out to dinner red rose in hand. On the other, if the supposition crawling around in the back of his head proved true, what was the ghoul up to?

Either way, he didn't like any of this.

He didn't like it at all.

But, he'd have to ponder all of that later as Lisbon was coming down the stairs.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: As always, the reviews are greatly appreciated, guest and otherwise. And, yes, Nat, I hope we're picking up a little momentum now that the foundation is laid. :) This one feels a little weird (which really isn't all that unusual for me) as the Muse has full range. However, the only way I know if I'm hitting the mark is by what you tell me. So a great big thanks for the feedback. ~Calla

#####

"La la la la la." Lisbon obnoxiously hummed loud enough to forestall any more audacity from Jane.

Expertly swerving around some idiot drifting too far into her lane for whatever lame brained reason, she couldn't stop the thought the man was a menace from streaking through her brain. He was. And not the other driver who seemed to have snapped back in shape at the sharp beep of her horn.

Jane.

"I am _so_ not discussing my sex life with you." Lisbon tossed a disgusted glance in his direction as she flipped on her right turn signal.

"Why not?" Jane didn't try to disguise his knowing grin. "It's not that big a secret you don't have one."

"You can get that crap eating grin off your face, Buster." Lisbon's hand itched to punch him in the nose. "I can't believe you asked what you did."

Actually, she could; but, it was more fun to act outraged when she really wasn't. Not _that_ outraged anyway. She knew Jane well enough to know nothing was sacred to the man. Not when his curiosity was aroused. She was more annoyed by the schoolgirl blush burning her cheeks than Jane nosing into "Noneyah" territory.

"Just answer the question, Teresa." Jane only called her by her given name on the job when he wanted to get under her skin which he was doing mighty well at the moment. "Admit it was that torrid little one-nighter with Mashburn you hoped no-one would notice but everyone did."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon growled. "You don't know everything about my life or you'd know you were wrong. I'm just more discreet about my nocturnal activities than you are so, no, Walter wasn't the last."

Lisbon couldn't believe she was answering the creep even if it was a lie.

"The lady doth protest too much, methinks." Jane fixed her with a knowing look.

"And quoting Hamlet at me is too cheesy even for you." Lisbon said as she changed lanes again. "I really don't care whether you believe me or not. When I last got laid is none of your business. It's one of those things falling under the heading for me to know and you never to find out. Got it?"

"Yeah, I got it." Jane said in that tone saying he wasn't letting go. "Oh, by the way, Lisbon, is that what we're calling it now? Nocturnal activities?" Jane smirked evilly in her direction trying the words on for size. "I like it. Even if you're trying to feed me a line of bull bigger than you are. The only way you've had any since Mash is if you picked someone up in a bar and took them home with you. We both know that isn't Saint Teresa's style."

"But punching you in the nose for being a smart ass is." Lisbon calmly reminded him.

"Yes, I suppose it is." Jane agreed looking out the window.

Glancing over at Jane, Lisbon wondered how she'd gotten sucked into a conversation rapidly digressing from a heated discussion of her Secret Admirer and his silly gifts to way too intimate in 0 to 5 seconds flat. It was beyond her. It really was. She suspected Jane was being deliberately annoying in an effort to take their minds off the fact they were en route to another gory crime scene courtesy of the Unmentionable One. After getting an email of the familiar logo on the wall from the local PD, neither of them had any doubts RJ had struck again. Not a copy cat; but, the devil himself. They knew him too well and every sign pointed to Red John.

Even worse than any of that was she'd almost flipped the tables on Jane in her usual take no prisoners style before she caught herself. There was no way in heaven or hell she wanted to know the last time he'd had sex. She wasn't one hundred percent he'd say that once in Vegas with Lorelei. She wasn't totally convinced they'd never hooked up again at least once. Goodness knows they'd had enough opportunity while she was on the loose.

Even if they hadn't, she knew Jane didn't spend every spare second of his life in his man cave buried in Red John files. He occasionally came out to work a case and have a break. Where he went on those breaks she didn't now. What she did know was she wouldn't be all that surprised if he'd found someone on the sly to help with stress relief. Now that he knew the appropriate movable parts still functioned it had to be difficult to maintain his celibate status quo.

Then again, she was talking about Jane. He could have very little difficulty keeping a handle on his desires. For all she knew he might have been functional because it was necessary to get to Red John. That Lorelei had been an attractive woman might not have played into it at all. Just his desire to get the job done and take advantage of the best in to Red John he'd had in years. It wasn't a secret Jane had refused the advances of far more beautiful, far less dangerous, females time and again. He'd refused the advances of a couple Lisbon would say were equally dangerous and equally fascinating as well.

As much as it pained her to admit, Lisbon did _not_ want to know either way.

Nor was she about to contemplate why.

Deciding to shift the focus somewhat, Lisbon cleared her throat regaining Jane's attention.

"Why the sudden interest in my personal life?" Lisbon asked. "You've never really cared whether I have one or not. Not really. Not beyond chasing off otherwise perfectly acceptable suitors on a whim. "

"I've always cared, Lisbon." Jane said quietly. "But, as you said, it's none of my business."

"Then why ruin my dates as only you can." Lisbon found she was really curious.

"Because, yes, Homeland Security Bob is legally separated and has been for a good while. However, he is still seeing the ex on occasion, and not for tea, so whatever is between them is definitely not over. I didn't want to see you caught in the middle of that."

"Why didn't you just tell me?" Lisbon asked. "I'd have stopped seeing him on my own."

"No, you wouldn't have because you really liked the guy." Jane clarified. "He's a real charmer. You would have asked him if he was still seeing his ex which he would have denied. You'd have then accepted his answer. Eventually, you'd have found yourself in the middle of a messy love triangle about the time the Missus found out about you and you'd have definitely been the other woman in that scenario. Not what you wanted to happen."

"What was wrong with the lawyer?" Lisbon asked.

"He stepped out on his ex-fiancée with three other women." Jane said. "He can't keep it in his pants."

"How do you know that?" Lisbon shook her head in disbelief.

"I have my sources." Jane said mysteriously.

"You didn't ask the ex-fiancée?" Lisbon asked with a wince.

"Would I do that?" Jane asked innocently.

"Yes, you would." Lisbon knew him too well to doubt it.

"She's a lovely woman." Jane confirmed.

"You are so dead." Lisbon couldn't think of anything else to say without actually killing him.

"Do we need to continue this conversation or will you accept my word they were all equally vile in their own special ways?" Jane asked.

"I'll accept your word." She didn't need him to reiterate all the ways her choices in men weren't the best.

She'd accepted that a long time ago. There were some exceptions here and there like Greg. But, most of those guys eventually bored her and that wasn't fair to them. Sometimes she thought it was best just to be alone. She was married to the job anyway.

"Good." Jane glanced out of his window at the road sign telling him they were within fifteen miles of their destination. "I have better things to do with my time than reminding my boss she needs to let someone else pick her dates."

"Yeah? Like who? Van Pelt? Her track record isn't much better than mine." Lisbon snorted. "So why are we even talking about all of this now?"

"Because you deserve a life." Jane said. "You've devoted too many years to making the world a better place for everyone else. To making people pay for their crimes. You need to take some of that time for yourself. Date a decent man, fall in love, have a brood of Baby Lisbons that remind you of the good times growing up before everything went bad."

"What if I don't want children?" Lisbon asked not really sure if she did or she didn't as she'd never given the matter much thought.

Sure, she liked the little buggers, and she was good with them. But having one or more of her own was an entirely different matter. She wasn't so sure about that. It wasn't like she'd be able to give them back when she was done. Nope, that one would take some serious meditation she wouldn't be having anytime soon.

"You will." Jane said. "When you find the right man."

"Who says I want to find the right man?" Lisbon asked. "Maybe I like my job and my life the way it is more."

"If you do then you've spent way too long chasing a serial killer." Jane glanced in Lisbon's direction as though he knew she was looking at him. "You deserve better."

"What about you?" Lisbon turned her attention from Jane's face back to the road.

"I've had a life." Jane said. "The one he took from me…You never have."

"I have a life, Jane." Lisbon knew they were getting close to the crime scene by the street names. "A life I'm proud of. It's one I find very fulfilling. I make the bad guys pay."

"Yeah, Lisbon, I suppose you do." Jane agreed still thinking it wasn't enough.

Not for a woman like Teresa Lisbon. But, as long as she kept telling herself it was, nothing would ever change. Even he couldn't make it.

"I honestly don't know what's gotten into you today; but, we're done with this conversation for now. We need to get our minds back on work." Lisbon wasn't stupid enough to think it was over, not by a long shot. He'd probably crank the whole spiel back up on the way home. Oh, joy, she had something to look forward to. "We have a case to solve."

Pulling into the drive of the large Victorian situated on at least five acres, Lisbon decided the good doctor was clearly doing well for herself. Or she had been. While not situated in the middle of town, the house was on the outskirts well within walking distance to anything of interest. It was also far enough away to ensure her privacy while still close enough for her patients to have easy access to her. It was an ideal setup by anyone's estimation.

Glancing briefly at Jane, Lisbon slid out of the SUV with a sense of dread in the pit of her stomach. From the sounds of things, they already knew Red John was at it again after a good six months of inactivity. He hadn't killed since Lorelei. He hadn't really had any reason to except boredom or reminding them he was still out there.

Not until now.

She wondered briefly what had set him off again. What had caused him to suddenly kill the only physician in a one horse town an hour and fifteen minutes outside of Sacramento? To suddenly strike the good doctor dead in the middle of the night sitting at her desk? On the surface, it didn't make a lick of sense. From what Chief Haney said, Dr. Booth was well liked by everyone particularly her patients. Added to that, none of her family, friends, or acquaintances had ever heard her mention the serial killer in passing much less say anything nasty against him.

As much as she hated to say it, Lisbon was beginning to think this was just another random RJ kill with nothing useful to impart to the chase beyond the fact the monster did it. Jane felt differently. He was already searching for the reason within the reason and the reluctant clue to be yielded once he discovered it. It was typical, frustrating Jane. All she could think was, "Obsessive much?" as she strode towards the large house serving as both office and residence to the young thirty-something victim.

From what she'd been told Dr. Breena Booth had returned to her hometown three years ago after her Residency to start what would become a booming practice in her family home. It hadn't hurt her business at all that her great-great grandfather was one of the town's founding fathers. Nor had the fact she was an attractive, empathetic woman who was good at her job. She was very well liked by all accounts. Not necessarily the typical Red John victim.

Lisbon was starting to think Jane may be right. They were going to find something, or someone, in her life connecting her to the serial killer. No matter how accidental it might seem. She knew as well that they would likely find that "whatever" in the course of doing their job so they might as well get to it. The sooner they did, the sooner the case would close and the sooner they'd no longer have to make the drive over from Sacramento. The sooner that happened, the less time Jane would have to bug her in private by asking asinine questions about her Secret Admirer she didn't have the answers to.

It was apparent her break down over Bosco had affected him far more than it had her. For the most part, she'd been releasing a whole lot of twisted guilt she shouldn't have been feeling in the first place but did. Jane had read far more into the situation than was really there. He still was. He was also making far too much of a handful of thoughtful gifts she'd never asked for but willingly accepted. Who really cared? The guy obviously lacked the wherewithal to step forward like a man and let his identity be known.

The fact her Mentalist was seeing boogeymen around every corner was getting on her last nerve. She'd let him know how she felt on the drive down. She'd also let him know she wasn't interested in her Secret Admirer whoever it was. If he ever decided to crawl out of the woodwork for the big reveal. She wasn't into this whole cloak and dagger thing. She really wasn't. The new had worn off the candy when he hadn't shown himself after that second gift. Now she just found the whole situation weird.

Walking through the front door Lisbon's eyes flickered around the foyer and adjoining room noting the locations of the local PD, Forensics, and her team. The victim was in her office where she'd been completing some late night paperwork. From what she'd been told, the office was three rooms down the hall on the right bordering the large swimming pool. Heading for the crime scene with Jane dogging her heels, Lisbon wasn't surprised to see the familiar smiling face before she saw the body posed so elegantly beneath it.

"What do we have?" Lisbon asked Cho who was standing by the body as she snapped on her gloves preparing to do some poking around of her own.

"A dead woman at her desk. Dr. Breena Booth, G.P." Cho stated impersonally. "It's a Red John kill."

"I can see that." Lisbon said waiting for the more that was coming.

"Multiple stab wounds, minimal defensive wounds, throat slashed, and toenails painted." Cho ticked off the gory details. "She knew him, Boss. Well enough she wasn't expecting any of this."

"I say that's a good guess as well." Lisbon said as she dropped the dead woman's hand. "I assume Rigsby's interviewing the neighbors who are were all too far away to have seen or heard anything and Van Pelt is out there helping search for the weapon we all know we won't find?"

"Something like that." Cho confirmed.

"What's estimated T.O.D.?" Lisbon asked as she studied the wound pattern intently.

"Twelve thirty to one a.m." Cho confirmed her suspicions.

"Very well." Lisbon stood up and removed her plastic gloves well aware that Jane was watching her every move. "Got something to add, Jane?"

"Not at the moment. Give me a few to get my bearings." Jane said as he edged a little closer to the body.

"What about that?" Lisbon pointed to the single, large, blood splattered ivory calla lily resting by the victim's right hand.

"We figured the killer left it." Cho said. "Forensics plans to bag it for processing."

"Red John doesn't leave flowers behind." Jane said. "Not his M.O."

"Maybe it belonged to Dr. Booth." Lisbon said. "It could be a gift from a patient for all we know."

Slipping her hands back in her gloves, Lisbon lifted the flower exposing the small card hidden beneath the oversized bloom. Feeling the hairs standing on the back of her neck, she turned the card to expose "Teresa Lisbon" written in a neat script. Opening the card with trembling fingers, she wasn't at all surprised to see the small red smiley face drawn in Breena Booth's blood.

"Shit." Lisbon dropped the flower back on the desk from suddenly nerveless fingers.

Walking over to lift the card with his handkerchief, Jane took in Lisbon's name and the disgusting smiley face. Glancing at Cho in a way that said he'd fallen down on the job, Jane turned his attention back to Lisbon. He should have expected something like this and he hadn't. The Cho Man wasn't the only one falling down on the job.

"We need to leave and we need to leave now. Let Cho and the team handle this. We'll work on the case from Headquarters." Giving Lisbon a moment to digest his words, Jane turned his attention back to Cho. "That wasn't meant for the good doctor. It's a present to your Boss from Red John."

Checking out the card himself, Cho made a promise to himself that this was the last time he relied so heavily on what the local PD said. Unfortunately, Lisbon's team had only arrived ten minutes ahead of their boss and hadn't had enough time to do a thorough investigation of their own. Fortunately, as he'd called Lisbon as soon as they got here, she knew that and wouldn't hold this fumble against him.

"Lisbon, what do you say?" Jane asked wanting to march her out the front door without a backward glance.

"I can't do that." Lisbon said quietly. "Cho, bag the flower and send it with the rest of the evidence. I need to get back to work."

Shaking his head at her stupidity, Jane dragged Lisbon a distance away from everyone before speaking in very soft tones.

"Lisbon, do I need to spell it out for you? In case I do, your Secret Admirer isn't a Secret Admirer. It's Red John playing twisted Red John games. That flower is clearly a death threat. Calla lilies represent beauty. Blood stained Callas aren't nearly so beautiful are they?"

"Stop it, Jane. We both know he's not going to kill me anytime soon." Lisbon's laugh was ugly. "That would end the game too quickly. He's just letting me know his intent down the road so there's no reason I shouldn't keep working. It isn't like it's not something I haven't always known. Get a grip and let's get our jobs done. We can talk about this later."

"And we will." Jane reassured her knowing he wasn't going to get anywhere with stubborn Lisbon.

He never did.

Turning his attention back to the murder at hand, Jane caught sight of something making him shift the victim in her chair revealing the leather bound book obscured by her body. Sliding the bloody tome from its hiding place he flipped the volume over easily recognizing he held a journal in his hands. A blood smeared journal; but, a journal none-the-less.

"Well, Lisbon, I'd say from looking at the good doctor's attire we have our connection." Jane said unnecessarily making Lisbon want to bop him. "It's shades of Rosalind Harker entertaining her gentleman caller. Why else would she be wearing an expensive negligee to do paperwork unless she was waiting for that special someone."

"Not again." Lisbon shook her head. "We'll never figure out what she did to deserve this."

"Oh, we'll figure it out." Jane said. "The answer is probably in here."

Sliding the blood smeared journal that had somehow gotten overlooked from beneath the body, Jane hastily scanned the open page. While the local PD could be excused for overlooking something so significant, her team was a different matter. Lisbon would have something to say to all of them for taking the yokels' words that everything had been checked out. The bloody Journal was resting beneath the body for goodness sakes. Lisbon would be so over it all ready. There was no excuse for shoddy police work and missing that was just plain sloppy. Jane didn't care how little time they'd actually had before Lisbon's arrival. It had taken him all of five seconds to see once he'd really looked at the body.

"Here it is, Lisbon. Whether the good doctor planned on breaking up with her lover tonight after a glass or two of expensive wine and a tumble I don't know. But, that she did intend to eventually do so is clearly stated in her journal. I'd say our old friend got the jump on her and chose to tie up loose ends.

Blind Rosalind was one thing. She's next to useless when it comes to giving us anything to aid our cause. Dr. Booth was another matter entirely. Not only could she identify him, I'm sure she would have once she realized who her lover truly was. There wasn't any other choice than she had to go.

Red John wanted us to know all of this or he wouldn't have left this open to the page with the answer in bold letters. She actually had a legible handwriting for a doctor. I'm impressed." Jane continued before dropping the journal in the evidence bag and making a face at the blood stained hanky in his hand.

"So am I." Lisbon agreed. "Good job, Jane." Wiping her face with her hand, Lisbon studied the crime scene and decided she'd seen enough coupled with what they'd uncovered. Actually, what Jane had; but, who really cared? "Cho, you're in charge. When you guys get through interviewing the neighbors and anyone else who might know anything, come back to the office. Jane and I are going back to poke through a journal. We'll call you with any leads."

"Got it, Boss." Cho said surprised Lisbon had stayed this long.

He was with Jane. The woman needed to back at the CBI. Not hanging around this particular crime scene like there was something she could do that they couldn't.

"Come on, Jane." Lisbon dangled the car keys. "You can drive."

Jane and Cho exchanged looks conveying Lisbon was a lot more upset than she was letting on to willingly let him drive. She only did that when she was feeling happy and living dangerously or when she was too incapacitated to feel safe driving. Since it wasn't the first, it was clearly the second.

Placing his hand lightly against her lower back, Jane guided Lisbon towards the door.

#####

Grabbing her soda from the vending machine, Lisbon waved at Hodges in passing. She and Jane had been back in the office barely four hours after leaving this morning. There was no denying the man drove like a fiend. She honestly hadn't cared as long as they arrived in one piece which they had. They'd then spent the next few hours alternately sifting through everyone mentioned in the good doctor's journal and feeling like they were invading a dead woman's privacy in doing so.

It seemed there was more to the good doctor than met the eye.

From what she wrote in her journal, Breena Booth had an alter ego that lived a riskier lifestyle on the down low that, while titillating, would mostly likely never have gotten her killed had she not unknowingly crossed paths with a serial killer. Or it most likely wouldn't have. It wasn't all that scandalous. Just far more liberated than her more demure professional persona indicated.

They'd spent the rest of the day ignoring the not-so-subtle death threat encompassed by that blood splattered bloom. At least that was the spin Jane put on it. It was a not-so- subtle, subtle for Red John, death threat. She wasn't so sure. It was RJ. He liked to play games. What else was new? Besides, he wasn't telling them anything they didn't already know. She'd always been a moving target on the Serial Killer's Hit List.

However, old bloody fingers _had_ cleared up one thing. There was now absolutely no doubt who her mysterious Secret Admirer was. Nor was there any question why he'd never crawled out the woodwork to make his presence known. Lisbon was grateful he hadn't.

He could have swept into her life and she wouldn't have known the difference. He could have wined her and dined her and charmed her in ways she never saw coming. He could have killed her like he killed Breena Booth.

Or worse yet, he could have left her to discover, at a much later date, that she'd been involved with the monster who'd killed Jane's family.

That thought had sent her running for the ladies room where she'd made a definitive note to herself. One that said, while spicy Tex Mex nachos were divine and among her favorites anytime, they weren't so good the second time around.

Popping the top on her soda, Lisbon stepped into the elevator and pushed the button for the top floor. She'd still have a couple of flights to navigate before she reached the roof. Taking a sip of her drink, Lisbon gathered her thoughts before the bell dinged and the door slipped open. Taking the stairs at a brisk pace, Lisbon walked out on the deserted roof. The restaurant had closed hours ago. In fact, almost everyone with the exception of the on-call staff on the second floor had left by seven. That it was nearly ten and she was still here said a lot about Lisbon's state of mind. Jane had probably creeped out of his Bat Cave soon after. Walking around the corner she edged up against the terrace wall and rested her arms on the balcony savoring the solitude.

Hanging her head and leaning forward, Lisbon closed her eyes against the horrors of the day. Or maybe she closed them against the phantom skulking in the shadows instead. She honestly didn't know.

What she did know was she was wrong about Jane having gone home as he clearly hadn't. That changed everything. Lisbon lifted her head to stare at the moon. As the whole day had been surreal, she might as well add to it. Snorting at the thought there was only one thing she could do to top getting a death threat from a serial killer, she decided to have a real what-the-hell moment.

"Hey, Jane, there's something I want to do before I die." Lisbon said softly a few minutes later letting her voyeur know she was aware of his sudden appearance as she continued staring into the starlit night.

As much as she wanted to resent it, Lisbon was glad her Consultant was with her at the moment as she'd demanded her team leave at the usual time. She'd not expected Jane to join her. In fact, she was sure he'd left for the night. He'd looked like hell the last time she saw him hours ago. He'd been following some dead end Red John lead concerning the case most of the day and into the night. As far as she knew, he probably thought she'd gone home long ago as well.

He'd proven her wrong about ten minutes ago when she'd heard him slinking about behind her, tea cup in hand, in that darkened corner even if he hadn't wanted her to know he was there.

Turning to face him and feeling her cheeks darken at his questioning look, Lisbon was glad they were standing in a very large blind spot few people knew anything about. The only reason she was aware it existed was she'd had to study the CBI Security Camera footage for a case not too long ago. The strange thing about the whole situation was she'd not intentionally stopped in this area. However, given how much of a fool she was about to make of herself, she was glad she had.

"You aren't going to die, Lisbon, not any time soon." Jane said with authority as he discarded his steaming cup of tea in its matching saucer on a nearby table. "But, why don't you tell me anyway?"

"Why don't I show you instead?" Lisbon asked as she took his face in her hands deciding she must still be under the influence of that hardy slug of Whiskey she'd commandeered from Carter's hidden stash an hour ago.

Lightly caressing his cheek, Lisbon rose on her tiptoes to press her lips against Jane's. Feeling him stiffen, she was sure her consultant was going to pull away. He wrapped his fingers through her hair to pull her tighter against him instead. Acquiescing to Jane's desire to deepen their kiss, Lisbon closed her eyes at the sudden, surprising sweep of his tongue against hers.

Responding to his overture with a sensual foray of her own; she prayed he wouldn't pull away anytime soon. Not even when their lungs were screaming for oxygen. She had every idea she'd never get another chance like this and she didn't want to lose it. From the feather light touches sweeping appreciatively where they clearly shouldn't as though memorizing every curve, Jane was as intent as she was in seizing a moment they may never have again. She couldn't help slipping her arms under his jacket to run her hands over his back. Even through his vest, Lisbon wasn't surprised to find Jane wasn't the softy people thought he was. He was actually quite firm with muscles she could surely appreciate under different circumstances. Circumstances his breath stealing kisses were making dance quite vividly across her eyelids as her imagination filled in experiences she would never get to have.

Eventually breaking apart due more to necessity than desire on either of their parts, Lisbon clearly read the look in Jane's eyes and returned his sad smile. What had passed between them had far more to do with emotions than sexual desires which were grounds far too dangerous for them to ever explore. Pressing her forehead against his, she smiled ruefully.

While he didn't regret what they'd done any more than she did, one heated stolen kiss between two desperate people didn't change what she already knew. Jane didn't dare offer her more and, truthfully, maybe he couldn't…Certainly not now…Maybe not ever.

To his credit, he'd never lied to her. Not about that. He hadn't even tried.

Lisbon couldn't agree with him more. She did know the score. She always had.

But, knowing the score didn't end the hope.

Stepping back, Lisbon blinked back tears as she settled against the banister lost in thought. It was hard to swallow that Lorelei had gotten what she could never have. For too many reasons not all Red John related. Like the one saying very clearly that intimacy between team members was highly unprofessional and seriously frowned upon. Even if Jane was technically a "Consultant," Bertram would not be happy with such a development. Not that there was any serious likelihood of that ever happening. Like it or lump it, the man standing beside her was still a member of her team and that was a line she wasn't willing to cross. Nor, it appeared, was Jane. She didn't really blame him. Any such actions on their part would cause a crap storm the like the CBI had never seen for no other reason than it would be them.

Besides, there was a big difference between a curious kiss that had gotten a tad out of hand and bare skin on skin. Even if that kiss clearly conveyed, if the man was as sinfully skilled with the rest of his body as he was with his lips, he hadn't forgotten a thing.

Turning to apologize for her actions, Lisbon stopped at the serious look on Jane's face as her words died deep in her throat. He clearly wasn't happy about whatever _he'd_ been thinking about either. Accepting the uninhibited hug betraying far more than he wanted it to, she wasn't all that surprised to feel the chaste kiss on her forehead or sense the lips hovering by her ear.

"You aren't going to die, My Dear." The words were soft, but emphatically, spoken. "I won't let you."

Then he was gone.

"I hate it when you do that." Lisbon mumbled into the darkness.

She did, too. Hate the way Jane blended so effectively into the night. Like a vampire or, more realistically, like he'd never been. It was another of those creepy traits he shared with a certain serial killer. Well, that and she knew he watched her leave every night like a silent protector in the dark. Like she knew he was still lurking somewhere on the seemingly deserted terrace waiting to follow her back to her office as he often did.

She doubted he would approach her again tonight. Not after that kiss. Or that hug.

However, he would see her safely to her car.

Even if she didn't see him, she always sensed his presence. Found great comfort in it. She had for years.

#####

Watching Lisbon gather her things and exit her office from where he stood in the shadows, Jane smiled as she efficiently made for the elevator. Turning, he left the bullpen by way of the stairs knowing he would be outside before Lisbon made it out the front door. Seeing the Security Guard open the door for the Senior Agent, Jane watched her navigate the darkness by streetlight across the parking lot. Seeing her slide behind the wheel of her personal vehicle, Jane stuck his hands in his pocket as he watched her car pull out of the drive. Once Lisbon was gone from his sight, Jane made his way to his vehicle. It was finally time to go home.

Not that he thought he would get much sleep once he reached his clean, but visibly shabby, hotel room.

His thoughts were in too much turmoil.

In spite of what Lisbon thought and they both knew; he'd enjoyed that kiss. And he'd wanted it immensely for a number of years. But, while he wasn't above showing her how he felt if she was wise enough to see it, he couldn't make her any promises. He couldn't say a "them" was possible. To even try would be a lie. Those words weren't his to give.

There were too many factors beyond his control.

That didn't mean he didn't have his own fantasies. That he didn't have regrets. One of his biggest was the necessity to use Lorelei in the first place. It had taken much too long for Lisbon to get past his very real betrayal. She'd looked at him far too long with those hollow, haunted eyes. In fact, he wasn't sure she ever truly had. Not until Lorelei died. Not until she'd assured herself those very real feelings she'd accused him of having were laid to rest for perpetuity.

Truthfully, he _had_ felt something for Lorelei. Was it love? He could honestly answer that with a resounding "No". He hadn't even liked the woman. But, had he possessed feelings? Yes, he had, and they'd been very real. Deep even. He'd empathized and sympathized with her plight. He may have even lusted after her; but, nothing stronger or more significant. That was why he hadn't been able to reassure the woman who really mattered that he didn't have feelings for her rival. It would have been a lie because he did. But, having feelings, no matter how deep, dark, or dangerous was not the same thing as being in love.

Any such feelings, to the degree he was willing to define them, belonged exclusively to Lisbon.

They had for a very long time.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: To my guests, and everyone else, thanks for the reviews. Sorry for the tardiness of the update. Between a nasty cold the first part of last week, work, and entertaining out-of-town company for few days the latter part of the week, there wasn't any time for writing. Added to that, it's unfortunate that it's taken me a bit to get back into the tale.

I am still aiming for at least one once-a-week update for both stories barring unforeseen circumstances.

To clear up a seeming misconception, according to Season 1, Episode 23: Red John's Footsteps; Jane's wife is _not_ the only Red John victim to have her toenails painted red with her own blood. A young victim, Emma Plaskett (twin sister of Maya Plaskett), had her toenails painted the same way to upset Jane and draw him into the trap Red John and Sheriff Hardy (a.k.a. Dumar) were laying. ~Calla

#####

Digging out a couple of tablespoons of still hot lasagna from the pan and plopping it on her plate, Lisbon carefully resealed the foil wrap around the edges. Mrs. Mancini had met her at the door as she was coming in with her "thank you" offering a few minutes ago. Her last Tibbles rescue had netted her a fabulous, rustic Seafood Stew complete with homemade Italian bread that fed her for days. If she remembered correctly, Jane had shown up out of the blue to help her enjoy it. The man seemed to have built in sonar for when the really good food was around. Lisbon shook her head as she savored the first delicious bite of sauce laden pasta before setting her fork aside. Jane so wasn't getting her lasagna so he could keep heading for Malibu.

Unfortunately, she wasn't hungry enough to do a meal justice at the moment. Not even one as good as this.

The events of the day were much too fresh. From the gory murder to the bloody blossom that should have been so beautiful to her daring kiss of Jane. She still hadn't worked through everything thoroughly enough to lay them to rest.

Opening her dishwasher, Lisbon stuck her dirty fork and bread plate in the bottom before pouring a glass of juice instead of the shot of Tequila she really wanted. Good thing she'd temporarily cleaned house after Bosco's death and hadn't bothered buying anything since. She could really use a drink which meant she wasn't having one. One of those Cardinal Rules she lived by. That didn't mean she didn't buy an occasional bottle of wine or have a case closed drink with her team. She just didn't keep that bottle of Tequila in her freezer any more. She didn't need the constant reminder of a late friend's passing though she had no fears of ever becoming her father.

She'd lived that life and she'd learned that lesson much too well.

Running her hands over the aluminum foil and the sides of the pan, she decided the lasagna was still much too hot to stick in the refrigerator. She'd check it again in a little while. As over the top as Rose Mancini's gifts always were for what Lisbon had actually done, she appreciated the woman's thoughtfulness. It eased her conscience that her elderly neighbor cooked large meals once a month for her church's Friday Night Potluck Dinner so she simply made a little extra of whatever she was preparing for her.

Taking one last look around her spotless kitchen, Lisbon decided to go upstairs for a long soak before hopping into her favorite pajamas and calling it a night. Today had been too weird to keep rehashing and it was time to pull the plug. Tomorrow would be better.

It was another day.

Putting her foot on the bottom stair, Lisbon turned slightly at the sudden knock that shouldn't be sounding through the night. No one she wanted to see would turn up at her place this time of night unannounced except Jane and he was halfway to another town…However, a not-so-secret secret admirer she never wanted to see might…_And_ he'd have the daring to walk right up and knock on her door…Leaning down, Lisbon removed the gun from her ankle holster about the time she heard the last familiar voice she expected to hear calling her name through the wooden panels.

Standing up, she walked over to answer the door.

"I thought you were still in your man cave or halfway to Malibu." She said quietly.

"I left about the time you did." Jane corrected as he stepped inside. While he'd intended going to Malibu for the weekend to nose about, he'd changed his mind. The drive was much too long to make for no good reason and there were places he'd rather be. "I rode around for a while thinking before I ended up here."

"Thinking about what?" Lisbon asked as she followed Jane into her kitchen not all that surprised when he opened her pantry to remove the mostly full bottle of expensive Bourbon he'd left on the top shelf sometime last year.

She'd never been sure if he bought the bottle himself or lifted it off one of their wealthier victims. She hoped it was the former and not the latter as she wouldn't put such an action past Jane. He was just too sneaky and irreverent for his own good sometimes.

"This and that." Reaching up to remove a juice glass from Lisbon's cabinet, Jane filled it half full of the amber liquid before returning the bottle to its darkened corner.

"Just this and that or the kind of this and that you have to get tipsy to talk about?" Not that she recalled ever seeing Jane truly tipsy. "Or is smashed more like it? You're not getting my bed if you do."

She'd certainly never seen him on a full blown drunk except for once a few years back. She _did_ know he got smashed like clockwork every year on the anniversary of his family's death. She'd fallen into that knowledge by accident one year when the fail safes Jane had put into place went awry and she'd ended up fetching him from some restaurant. She'd slept on her couch that night and given Jane her bed as she'd fully expected him to be every bit as vilely ill as he'd proven to be. That hadn't been a pleasant couple of days for anyone.

"Hardly." Jane said as he offered her his glass.

Deciding his cooties didn't matter as she'd already run her tongue over his tonsils among other things, Lisbon took a healthy slug deciding, nope, her opinion hadn't changed.

She liked Tequila better…even the nasty, rot gut kind.

"Are you hungry?" Lisbon asked knowing she had plenty of leftover lasagna on her counter getting cold and fresh salad fixings in her fridge.

Out of this world lasagna she'd been given for ending Tibbles semi-annual break for freedom. Such events were fortunately few and far between as the scruffy, oversized demon cat always wedged into very tight places necessitating standing on her head to get him free. Lisbon was convinced he did it on purpose to justify those condescending kitty smirks he liked to give her. No matter how you cut it, there was little dignity to be found in sprawling on the ground with your butt hiked up in the air even if it was for a good cause.

"Miss Mancini made me some lasagna today and it's really good." Lisbon tantalized him convinced she could find part of a leftover loaf of homemade Italian bread still hiding in her freezer.

"Tibbles make his semi-annual sneak for freedom?" Jane asked knowingly.

"Oh, yeah, and I caught the stinker like I usually do." Lisbon laughed recalling their familiar dance and knowing the fat Tabby would never have been captured so easily if he hadn't wanted to be.

"Save it for later." Jane said. "We both had a late lunch so I suspect neither of us is all that hungry."

"Fine." Lisbon gave him an inquisitive look. "If you didn't come here to eat and you don't want to watch a movie since you aren't nosing through my pile of new DVDs, then why are you here?" Lisbon asked softly. "I know you didn't come to talk."

"Maybe I did." Jane gave her an inscrutable look easily topping Cho's finest poker face.

"No, you didn't, any more than you came here to raid my non-existent liquor cabinet." Lisbon nodded in the direction of the glass in his hand. Taking a step closer to Jane, she was somewhat surprised he didn't take an involuntary step back at her brazen invasion of his personal space. The man was far better at invading than he was at being invaded. She'd learned that long ago. "If I don't miss my guess, I'd say you're as distressed by the events of today as I am. You came here to reassure yourself that I'm okay and maybe to make sure I'm alone." And she was glad he had. "As you can see, I am, on both counts."

Jane didn't deny her words.

"And I think you came here for a repeat performance of this." Lisbon said daringly.

Gripping his face between her palms much as she had earlier as she rose on her tiptoes yet again, Lisbon pressed her lips against Jane's feeling more confident than she had on the terrace that he wouldn't pull away. Hearing him blindly easing his glass on the counter in favor of wrapping both arms around her, Lisbon savored the spicy flavor of Bourbon on his lips. If they never got any farther than tangling tongues, the one thing she could say with certainty was Patrick Jane was a mighty fine kisser.

"You know you're courting disaster." Jane whispered silently acknowledging he'd done the same in coming here tonight in the first place. "Nothing good can from any of this."

"Sometimes a girl's got to live dangerously." Lisbon volleyed back without missing a beat.

He was right.

It didn't get more dangerous than Patrick Jane.

Not for her or her job.

Unless it was Red John and she wasn't going there. Not tonight. She'd chase the bastard in her nightmares some other time. Maybe she'd catch him one day. Or better yet, put a bullet in his brain.

Right now, she was too busy chasing Jane.

Taking her at her word, Jane reached down to scoop her in his arms. Shooting him a questioning look, Lisbon decided while she was heavier than most people thought, Jane was also much stronger than he looked. Or he seemed to be. She found comfort in the fact he didn't appear to be having any difficulties carrying her. She'd give him the benefit of the doubt until they both tumbled down her stairs. At that point all bets were off. She was so kicking his ass for his stupidity.

It wouldn't matter she'd allowed him to do it.

Resisting the urge to say she would have followed him to her room had he asked, would have led the way in fact, Lisbon decided to enjoy the ride instead. There were very obvious things to be learned along the way. Like Jane's chest was surprisingly firm beneath her palm and he smelled nothing short of divine. Like man, woods, and spice with an underlying hint of herbaceous aromatics. It was an unusually rich fragrance with dark depths she wasn't used to but liked. It worked on Jane.

Pressing her nose against his neck to get a good whiff, Lisbon decided as untidy as the man could get when he lost himself in the chase, it was sometimes easy to forget for the most part Jane was pretty fastidious most of the time. He was neat and clean and he always smelled nice. Then there were those occasional periods she preferred to forget. Those moments when she questioned if he'd temporarily lost his sanity and accepted he probably had. Fortunately, those "events" had lessened somewhat over the years.

Pressing her hands against his chest as he allowed her to slide to the ground, Lisbon gazed around her room before looking up at Jane.

"So this is what you were thinking about? Lisbon asked softly. "Carting me off to my room like a caveman for goodness only knows what?"

"Among other things." Jane answered honestly. "As for that whole goodness-only-knows what bit, you're a smart girl, Teresa. My intent is hardly a mystery."

Lisbon didn't deny his words nor did she protest his actions.

As for what he'd really been thinking about while he was driving around, his thoughts had mostly centered on how she'd looked standing on that terrace with her head hanging down. Tiny, vulnerable, and more frightened than he'd ever seen her appear…None of which were ways Lisbon should ever look…And she never had except for those few unpleasant weeks with Tommy Volker before she'd asked for his help.

Shortly thereafter, they'd ended the man's freakish reign of terror at a zoo of all places.

As much as he disliked admitting it, Jane decided he'd felt much the way he was feeling now back then. Like he wanted to do nothing more than find her tormentor and put him six feet under. In this case, he'd settle for amping up the chase instead. As much as he hated innocent people dying; the more active Red John was the more likely he was to make a mistake. The more mistakes he made, the greater their chances of catching him. If the monster was ready to bring it on, he was ready to cage him. Or kill him. Whichever happened first.

It wasn't like they didn't have a viable list to work from.

As far as he was concerned, once Red John was caught, their lives would change for the better. He was sure of it. How, he didn't really know. All he could say with certainty was the possibilities were endless.

Jane admitted that he'd thought as well about that exact moment when Lisbon's palm had lightly cupped his cheek as she rose on her toes to press her lips against his. He'd replayed every nuance over and over in his mind. And, yes, he'd been initially shocked by her hesitant overture. Shocked enough he'd stiffened but never pulled away. Then, he'd become intrigued by the daring whisper of her tongue against his….

Intrigued and inflamed to the point it had been Lisbon's turn to consider pulling away when he'd taken what she offered and upped the ante. But she hadn't. She'd pressed into him instead allowing his hands to roam lightly over her body as she ran her fingers across his back. Neither of them had been remotely interested in ending their erotic dance or in halting their vying for dominance.

Unfortunately, the necessity to breathe had done just that for both of them.

"I think you know I'm not going to stop you." Lisbon said as she placed his hands on her shoulders leaving the rest up to Jane. "And that I lied on the terrace."

Kissing him hadn't been the one thing she wanted to do before she died. But, her lips against his had been as far as she'd been willing to go. She'd refused to betray how badly she wanted the one thing she could never have. The personal risk of attempting anything more than she had was just too great. She wasn't adding her name to that ever-growing list of women who'd made fools of themselves over the years over Jane. A good portion of them had, and still, worked for the CBI. That was one of the reasons the gossip about them was so malevolent and vicious. And one of the reasons she found it so easy to ignore. It was nothing but sour grapes and animosity aimed at her because she was closer to Jane than anyone. She was used to all of that by now. It came with the territory.

"I know." Just as he _knew_ she wasn't going to die. "Things changed with Volker."

"Yeah, they did." Lisbon said. "You were there for me."

"I told you a long time ago I would always have your back." Jane reminded her. "That's never changed and it's not going to."

Even if he had been selective in applying that promise over the years and had a lot to make up for.

"Don't make vows you can't keep." Lisbon said knowing he'd eventually get distracted by the chase yet again. "You were there for me then and you're here now. That's enough for the moment."

Jane didn't agree as he was finally admitting Lisbon had always been there for him. Through thick and thin no matter the cost. There'd been the times he'd tried to distance himself when she'd refused to let him. There'd been times when she'd tried to cut him out of her life and he'd refused to let her. She'd picked him up from jail after Timothy Carter. She'd been with him through Lorelei in spite of the personal pain. She'd been sanctioned and nearly lost her job over him more times than he wanted to count. Truthfully, she'd paid in ways she never should have for the dubious "privilege" of having him as a member of her team and for the tainted honor of calling him friend.

It appeared she was willing to sacrifice even more for the corrupting pleasure of taking him to her bed. Maybe even her soul.

"Far from it; but, we'll discuss that later." Jane corrected her.

Right now he was as interested in pulling her close and pressing his lips against hers as she was in reciprocating his advances. He could see the truth in her eyes.

Resisting the urge to be the aggressor, though for all intents and purposes she already was, Lisbon allowed Jane to dictate the pace of what was happening between them. Yes, a part of her wanted to get the show on the road before he changed his mind…before _she_ did. But, the greater part of her wanted to experience Seduction by Jane. To know what it was like to touch and be touched by the man he used to be.

The partner Angela had known and she'd yet to meet.

The one who'd been such a devoted husband and lover he'd completely let his dead wife go.

Watching the fingers flowing softly over her cheek to her jaw and down the line of her neck committing every curve and plane to memory, Lisbon regretted the fact she'd not changed into something more silky and feminine. Something that was softer and more appealing. She silently lamented, although she'd removed her blazer, boots, and socks soon after arriving home, she was still wearing the same hunter green blouse and slacks she'd worn to work. It didn't matter Jane still wore his same three piece suit as well.

This wasn't the way she'd always imagined this moment if she'd ever imagined it at all.

Then again, maybe it was, and maybe she had.

In the big scheme of things, this ridiculous scene was very them.

Any seducing going on between a Lisbon and a Jane was bound to be unplanned and spur of the moment. It would have to be given their erratic lives and their secretive personalities. Maybe she shouldn't lie to herself about expecting anything different. They weren't rose petals and champagne lovers. They never had been and they never would be.

Not even in her dreams.

They were more of a shucking their clothes and getting it on after hours on the couch in her office over Tequila and tea kind of pair. She may as well accept reality trumped tawdry romance novel any day. Lisbon closed her eyes against the illicit imagery such thoughts provoked and found she kind of liked it. At least Jane would be forced to pick up the pace instead of making her suffer through his erotic memory making. Not that she was complaining mind you.

There was something about Jane's dawdling she was finding highly arousing. Maybe it was that it was Jane. Or maybe it was the intensity of his touch and the look in his eyes.

The one saying he was mapping her very soul.

Lisbon wasn't sure how she felt about that. Jane saw too much as it was anyways.

As for the other, as pleasant as her imaginings, that so wasn't happening…ever. Not in her office and never at work. Not even in her wildest dreams. No way. That was a fantasy best left buried deep in their heads where it belonged _never_ seeing the light of day. She could see Bertram's face now if it ever got out she'd been banging Jane in her office at the CBI. Not a pretty sight. Not pretty at all. The conversation following would be less pleasant.

Unconsciously holding her breath, Lisbon gazed down at Jane's hands as he finally found his way from tormenting her with his touch to releasing that first button on her blouse. Mercifully, that the first was soon followed by the second and third. It was a miracle. She wanted to clap when he undid the final three.

The man was killing her here.

But, she wasn't about to break the spell. Jane was clearly committing every nuance of undressing her to his formidable memory and that meant something important to him. And it meant something equally significant to her. While they both knew this could never be more than a one night stand, it was anything but.

It was them.

Bowing her head Lisbon smiled softly at the thought, were she ever to ask, he would probably recall exactly how many times her heart had beaten and how many breaths she'd taken as he slipped her blouse from her shoulders bearing her to his gaze for the very first time. As strange as the thought seemed, she found it enticing that any man would care enough to notice such things. And, if any did, that man would surely be Jane.

Closing her eyes, she savored the feel of his hands against naked skin.

"Honest to goodness, Lisbon, I don't believe you." Jane's laughter tinged voice interrupted her sensual musings as he unfastened her back holster and laid it aside before kneeling to remove her ankle holster as well. At least she had the forethought to remove her shoulder harness when she'd gotten home so he didn't have to. That had to count for something. "Now, that's better."

Lisbon smirked at the thought only Jane would care that a law enforcement officer was still wearing her fire power. That was one area where she and Jane would always differ. He still wasn't fond of guns while she adored them. Oh, he liked them well enough every time she used one to save his sorry butt when it would be less trouble to let him get shot. But, other than that, he didn't like them very much. There was something about the fact they could kill Jane found very off-putting.

Glancing at her blouse flying through the air to land on a nearby chair, Lisbon briefly regretted she was wearing the same comfortably serviceable neutral bra and string bikini she'd worn to work. She hadn't realized she was having company or she'd have changed into something more tantalizing. Then again, she wouldn't have had those kinds of thoughts even if she had known Jane was coming. One passionate kiss aside, as far as she'd known they weren't _that_ kind of friends.

Besides, he didn't seem to mind what he was seeing. There was something about Jane's hungry gaze conveying he was far more enthralled by the softness of her skin and the gentle, feminine swell of her breasts and hips than he was with the fabric encasing them. His deep appreciation was a very tangible thing.

"If you doubt I'm thinking anything other than how beautiful you are, you need to stop thinking." Jane said as he tossed her pants over to join her shirt. "Everything about you is perfect and exactly as I imagined it to be."

Interrupting her thoughts, he didn't particularly care that Lisbon wasn't pleased he'd always imagined her wearing plain, serviceable underwear. But, it was a very Lisbon thing to do and there was something highly arousing about staying true to oneself. Although she would never believe him, he would have been disappointed to find her any other way.

And, yes, as he was very detailed oriented, he _had_ pondered precisely what she was wearing under her professional attire many a time when Lisbon thought he was sleeping. Pondered, and dismissed, any fantasies containing too much lace, ribbons, and bows as being highly unLisbonesque. He'd also imagined her without her serviceable underwear quite a few times though he doubted disclosing that anytime soon would work in his favor. Even if he told her the reality far surpassed any pictures he'd painted in his mind.

"And, if you doubt any part of me hasn't been having impure thoughts almost since the first prim and prissy "Mr. Jane" passed your lips, I can assure you're totally wrong. I had a suspicion even then you were anything but proper in bed and I seriously doubt you're going to disappoint me now. Blush all you want, My Dear; but, we both know it's true. The thoughts going through your head right now are shockingly bawdy. You'll have to decide if I make love as well as I kiss. I'm inclined to say better."

Jane's expression turned devilish at the blush staining her cheeks and the silent "Shush!" she shot him from her eyes.

"As for me, as much as I fought what I believed nothing more than prurient interest in the beginning, I found myself growing more intrigued with the possibilities as the years went by. You're quite the appealing woman, Teresa. What's not to like about fiercely stubborn sass combined with a quiet, understated beauty sneaking up on a man before he knows what hit him?

Oh, and I think you should know, no matter what some idiots have been whispering for years, I'm not impotent. I never have been. I was celibate by choice with the exception of Lorelei as you well know; but, impotent? Nope. Not anything I've ever been.

Surely you didn't believe those ridiculous theories?"

Jane wouldn't have thought Lisbon could get any redder if he hadn't seen it for himself.

"You've got to be kidding me?" Jane stared at her in disbelief. "You did. As well as you claim to know me, you don't. I would have thought I'd given myself away years ago in much the same way you have.

We've had our moments, Lisbon; moments where you should have realized there was something sizzling between us. Moments when you should have at least _seen_ the affect you were having on me if nothing else. Oh, I forgot, you'd never notice something like that. You're the one woman in the whole CBI who's never checked out a man's rear end. Even Van Pelt does that on a regular basis."

"Yeah, Rigsby's." Lisbon snorted at how obvious those two were.

"You know, just because neither of us chose to acknowledge them doesn't mean they weren't there even if you told yourself differently." Jane shook his head.

As lousy a liar as Lisbon was, it seemed she was fully capable of lying to herself and doing quite well at it.

"You did the same thing." Lisbon reminded him.

"I suppose I did." Jane agreed. "However, I can't do that anymore. Now that you've irreparably blurred that line, I find you quite irresistible. There's no way I'm leaving here without taking you to bed."

"And I'm going to let you even knowing it can never happen again." She shoved his jacket off his shoulders determined to get to skin on skin in a fraction of the time he'd taken. "Oh, and you're wrong. I have checked your ass out a few times over the years. It's rather nice. Just don't tell anyone I said that or I'll have to deny it."

Grinning up at Jane, Lisbon decided seh couldn't fault Jane for taking his own sweet time. She knew what he was up to. If she loved him, and she wasn't admitting she did, she'd love him even more for what he was doing. For giving them both the chance to discuss what needed discussing before they crossed a line that could never be uncrossed. More importantly, he was giving her the opportunity to back out and walk away with her heart, her pride, and her job intact. They hadn't done anything to get either of them fired yet.

Once they spent the night getting to know each other in ways they never had, such actions couldn't be undone.

"And I'm not prim and prissy, Jane." Lisbon came back to what was bugging her.

"You were, and you are, prim and prissy to a fault when the mood strikes." Jane corrected her. "As for the other, you're a grown woman, Lisbon, you had to have suspected I at least found you physically attractive."

"I wasn't being prissy. I was reacting to the fact you refused to follow the rules. You still do." Lisbon corrected him. "As for suspecting any kind of attraction, I'm sure I didn't."

It would have freaked her out on so many levels if she had. It would have excited her in forbidden ways, too. Had she known, she might have made her move long before now.

Then again, how could she not have know? She'd gotten really, really good at denial since she met Jane. That's how.

"Teresa, all that matters is now." Jane reminded her.

"And the fact it took Red John making an overt threat to get us here." Lisbon reminded him.

"Perhaps, but he has nothing to do with any of this." Jane said firmly. "Nothing beyond providing the catalyst forcing us acknowledge what's been between us for a very long time."

"Jane, we're seriously screwed up and this whole situation is a nightmare waiting to happen. You realize that?" Lisbon said as she removed his vest and tossed it over to join the growing pile of clothes littering that chair. "This is the last thing we should be doing at a time like this."

"Yet it's the one thing we most want to do." Jane stopped the fingers busily unloosing the buttons of his shirt before forcing Lisbon to look into his eyes. "I'm not making love to you only to lose you. You know that."

"I do." Lisbon said.

And she did.

It was that singular belief making a few stolen hours worth the risk.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews. You're all greatly appreciated. I will get around to addressing the one's that I can as I usually do. I'm afraid I've been more interested in writing new chapters for DiL and NTB with the limited time I have at the moment! For my guests, you guys are loved and appreciated a lot!~Calla

#####

Closing her eyes against the sensations washing over her, Lisbon decided it had been way too long since she'd been this close to a man. Or maybe it was simply that it was Jane so lustily claiming her. That it was Jane's weight boring her into the mattress. Jane's body forcing her to stretch and bend in ways she hadn't for much too long. Jane's teeth nipping at her neck in a way that so better not leave a mark no matter the pleasurable frisson's the mild pain sent skittering through her body. That it was Jane's tongue laving her so intimately and his knowing fingers wantonly dipping and mapping every curve of her form.

For once she was glad she'd surrendered control. That she was letting him take them where he wanted to go. There was something sensually satisfying about just going with the flow...especially when Jane was guiding the ship.

"Patrick."

There was something about staring so deeply into his eyes while he was buried so intimately within her Lisbon found overwhelming. Eyes that were often rendered blue thanks to what he was wearing when they were really but a paler shade of green than her own.

"Teresa." The whisper light touch of fingertips over skin was painfully erotic to her senses without the arousing gruffness of his voice.

Looking away, Lisbon murmured softly under her breath as she softly cursed the man and his infernal memory palace…The compulsive necessity driving him to commit every hedonistic rise and fall of their bodies, every whisper, every sigh, and every moan to that sacred place within his mind never to be forgotten unto his dying day. ..His very actions, while meant to comfort, were only serving to underscore the hopelessness of their situation in the recesses of her mind.

The reality they had but this one opportunity to express feelings better left unsaid.

"Damn it, Jane." Lisbon watched him catch her tear on his finger.

The one rolling unbidden down her cheek she'd never meant to fall.

Looking away, Lisbon decided she was used to rough and tumble sex and found great joy in the experience. She'd even believed she'd made love a few times a lifetime ago when she thought she'd felt something she hadn't. She wasn't, however, familiar with being worshipped in quite the way Jane was touching her…As though she was the single most revered thing in his life giving it structure, hope, and meaning.

Perhaps she did.

He certainly did that for her.

"Teresa, look at me." Jane forced her attention back to them. "It's alright to let go and let yourself feel…I don't think either of us do enough of that…We can't usually afford to…But, we can now."

"Shush, Jane." Reaching up, Lisbon pulled him into a passionate kiss as she urged him to stroke deeper, harder, and faster as she knew he wanted to.

They could take their own sweet time the second time around. And while she knew Jane intended this to be the only time they tasted the sweetness of each other's flesh, she felt differently. That being said, she'd have to change his mind as she fully intended to keep him by her side for as long as she could.

They had the whole weekend to get to know each other in ways they never had.

She saw no reason they shouldn't take advantage of the moment they'd fallen into.

They way she saw it, Death by Orgasm beat the heck out of a bullet to the brain.

#####

Gazing down at her naked back and the delectable curve of her derriere, Jane reached out to rub his hand over Lisbon's skin as he reached across her to grab her cell from the nightstand beside her.

"Lisbon, your phone is ringing." He dangled the offending cell in front of her face.

Resting his hand lightly on her lower back, Jane took in the play of light muscle under her skin. No wonder the woman almost killed him. Lisbon was as close to top form as he'd expected her to be. She was a detective and she took care of herself. She was also fairly athletic. Why he hadn't expected her to be as good in be as she'd proven to be was beyond him. Probably for the same reason she hadn't expected him to be.

Neither of them was known for their amorous conquests. He could count the number of men Lisbon had gone out with since he'd known her on less than two hands. He could count the number of lovers she'd had on less than one including himself and that other one-night stand.

As for him, everyone knew the only time he'd gotten laid since his wife's death was that one time in Vegas with Lorelei. If any man should have forgotten how it was done, that would be him. Fortunately, sex didn't work that way.

"Don't you dare answer that." Lisbon snatched the phone from his hand before hitting a button and putting it to her ear knowing answering her work line was definitely something Jane would do. The man had no shame. He wasn't above letting select people know he was banging his Boss for the hell of it.

God help her if it was Bertram or one of her team. They'd be so busted. If she thought her life had taken a detour to hell a few hours ago, she hadn't seen anything yet. Not if it got out she was sleeping with Jane. Briefly closing her eyes, she silently admitted _had_ slept with Jane was probably the more accurate version. It wasn't likely to happen again. But that wouldn't matter. The damage was already done.

"Lisbon." She barked fully expecting the familiar voice she heard on the other side. "No, you're right, we really can't do anything about that over the weekend…Yeah, it's a good idea…Right, Jane would never think of that…It is too simple…Sounds like a plan…Yeah, follow up first thing Monday morning and take Rigsby with you…Let me know what you find out…Yeah, have a nice weekend, too."

Lisbon ended the call and set her cell aside.

"Cho call you often at midnight?" Jane asked intrigued.

"Sometimes." Lisbon admitted. "When we're in the middle of a nasty case like this one he does. When he gets a lead or the pieces start coming together. Occasionally, I call him when I do. We have informal pow-wows to share our thoughts. That's why he's my Number One. He's a good detective even when he's off the clock."

Much as she was.

They might not be sitting at a desk; but, they were still working the case. Unfortunately, the case at hand was Red John so it wasn't like they were going to find that one thing suddenly revealing his identity. They'd all be in the office if they thought there was a snowball's chance in hell of that happening. Since there wasn't, they were all taking a much needed break to rejuvenate while they could. Given their line of work there was no telling when they'd get the chance again.

"Yes, he is." Jane said speculatively with a telling leer in his eyes.

"Stop it, Jane." Lisbon resisted the urge to smack him. "There's never been anything inappropriate between us and there never will be."

"Not that the thought has never crossed his mind over the years." Jane remarked casually knowing darned well the Korean Agent found his Boss appealing and always had.

Though she didn't know it, Lisbon had that affect on men. There was just something compelling and fascinating about the woman that had nothing to do with those gorgeous eyes, her diminutive size, or the fact she carried a really big gun she was fully capable of using. Or even that she was a remarkably good looking woman. It was more her warm heart and generous spirit than anything else subconsciously catching the masculine interest.

Not that Cho would have ever made a move if she wasn't his boss or a fellow team member. He wouldn't have. There was a big difference between admiring from afar and having a full blown relationship with a woman like Teresa Lisbon. Attraction aside, she wasn't necessarily his type when it came to the long haul and his boss wasn't the kind of woman to dally with.

A man might never recover once it was over.

"I am so not going there." Lisbon commented as she inched a little closer to Jane. "The whole idea is preposterous in the first place."

"Teresa." Jane gently halted her movements stopping her hand on its downward descent.

"I know all of this just kind of happened." Lisbon caught his eyes in her piercing emerald gaze. "I'd like it to just happen one more time."

As much as she hated the vulnerability in her voice, she hated the thought of this moment ending more.

"I don't think it's a good idea." Jane's words were gently spoken as his gaze remained unwavering.

He wasn't oblivious to what her plea was costing her. And he wasn't oblivious to what it was costing him to turn her down. There was nothing he wanted more than getting lost in the sensations, sights, and sounds of loving the woman beside him. But he couldn't afford to lose himself in emotions he hadn't felt since Angela yet again. Neither of them could. It was much too dangerous.

Such foolish risks could cost more than their jobs.

It could cost their lives.

"I can go back to pretending there's nothing between us." Lisbon reassured him. "You don't need to be concerned about that."

Not because she wanted to; because there wasn't any other choice. _He_ wasn't giving her one.

And neither was Jane.

"I'm not sure I can." The raw honestly in Jane's voice gave Lisbon pause.

"Try." She whispered against his neck as she closed the last of the distance between them. "Just pretend this was one of your fantasies and it never really happened if you must."

"You think I have fantasies about you, Teresa?" Jane's brow rose appreciatively at her daring as she crawled up his body intent on luring him into letting her have her wicked way.

"I'd say it's a reasonable guess." Lisbon answered honestly. "I know I do."

"Then you'd be right." Pulling her more firmly against the body part rapidly responding to her overture, Jane grasped the hand lazily sweeping over his chest grabbing her full attention as he'd meant to do before reaching up to cup her cheek. "You're wrong about all of this just happening. Nothing just happened and you know it. You opened this door on the terrace and I decided it was time for us to walk through it."

"So, you're telling me you dropped by with the intent of seducing me?" Lisbon's voice held a note of disbelief.

"Hardly, I dropped by with the intent of letting you seduce me." Jane corrected her. "While you aren't going to die any time soon no matter what you think, we both know that kiss wasn't what you really wanted to do. It wasn't what I wanted either and I should know. I thought long and hard about it."

"I don't suppose it was." Lisbon agreed as anything else would be a bald faced lie.

"It wasn't." Jane said as he lifted her hand to his lips. "And leaving isn't what I want to do now."

"Then don't." Lisbon entwined her fingers through his before leaning over to teasingly kiss his lips. "A few more hours isn't going to make things any more difficult than they already are."

"No, I don't suppose they will." Jane agreed knowing his memories couldn't get more vivid than they already were.

Not the ones they'd already made or the ones they were about to make.

Angling her hips, Jane watched the play of emotion on her face as he slid smoothly home taking possession of her pliant body in the manner she'd been inviting him to. If there was one thing that had shocked him about Teresa Lisbon as lover, it certainly wasn't her depth of passion. It was her vulnerability. As lousy a liar as she was, he'd still not expected her every emotion to be laid bare before him.

The yearning, desire, and passion he'd expected. The raw love he hadn't. Not that he didn't know she possessed such feelings towards him, he did. She wasn't that good at hiding them in moments of stress. Besides, even if he hadn't, Barlow had told him as much and Lisbon's expression seconded it.

Running his hands up taunt thighs and over Lisbon's sides, Jane realized he would never forget a single nuance of making love to the woman rising and falling so beautifully in the sensual rhythm he was allowing her to set. Feeling her fingers entwine with his, Jane looked up to see her staring down at him with a look in her eyes he was sure was reflected in his. Allowing his gaze to flow over her, Jane sent Lisbon a look clearly asking what she was waiting for? She'd made the first move. He'd taken her up on it. Now it was time for her to finish what she started. As much as he liked being the dominant lover, he wasn't above letting Lisbon take her gratification as she pleased.

Jane wasn't sure which sensual delight he found the most maddening about his lover. Perhaps it was the feel of her body so tightly sheathing him or the softness of her skin beneath his palms. Maybe it was the open play of emotion over her face. Or, quite possibly, it was the subtle scents so uniquely Lisbon detectable to his senses even beneath the perfume she wore. Or maybe it was the way her pupils dilated and her breath hitched in her throat when he lightly cupped her breasts. Or the rapid acceleration of her pulse beneath his lips.

Or maybe it was the suddenly tightening of her body and the wildness in her eyes signaling she was fast approaching the precipice. Maybe it was the answering tightening within his body signaling he would go with her when she went. Gripping her hips a little tighter, Jane urged Lisbon towards her release knowing he'd not been so synchronized in his passions with any woman but his wife.

He'd certainly not been with Lorelei.

Watching Lisbon come apart in his arms, Jane allowed her to blindly pull him into her undoing holding her still while he spent himself within her.

#####

Sliding the door open, Lisbon stepped carefully onto the balcony nearly overflowing coffee cup in hand. Looking up, she wasn't at all surprised to see Jane leaning against the banister sipping tea. She was surprised to see him already dressed in his shirt and slacks.

That didn't bode well for the coming day.

If it had, Jane would be wearing the pajamas he kept in the top of her guest room closet. He wouldn't be two thirds dressed to leave.

"Lisbon." Jane took in the worn jersey showing far too much shapely leg for his tastes.

At least she'd combed her bed head before coming down stairs.

"Jane." Lisbon said quietly before taking a sip of brew. "It's okay. I know the score."

"Do you?" Jane asked equally softly not so sure she did after she'd so deliberately seduced him a second time and he'd so weakly let her.

"Yeah, I do." Lisbon answered. "You can't offer me anything as there's nothing to offer."

"Even if I could, I wouldn't." Jane confirmed the painful words looking everywhere but at her. "We both know what would happen if I did."

"I suppose we do." Lisbon agreed.

"I won't let that happen to you." Jane said quietly.

"Don't make promises you can't keep." Lisbon took a sip of her coffee refusing to look at Jane.

"What makes you think I can't keep that promise?" Jane asked knowing she wouldn't state the ugly truth hanging between them.

"You'll certainly try." Lisbon said.

"Yes, I will." Jane agreed. "This was never what he intended you know…Our coming together like this. He isn't going to like it."

"Then I suggest we don't let him find out." Lisbon closed her eyes briefly before opening them wide. "You're not going to make me regret any of this…No matter what you say."

"I don't want you to." Jane said. "I do want you to be careful."

"I'm not going to be careless knowing he's out there waiting to get me." Lisbon reassured him.

"I won't let him get you." Jane knew the hand hauling her to him was gripping her arm painfully tight and his face was much too close. "You have to believe that."

"I know you'll try." Lisbon repeated.

The total faith tempered by acceptance of her fate gleaming in the depths of Lisbon's eyes quickly became too much. Releasing her, Jane silently walked back inside unsure of what his next move should be. He knew what the smart move was. He should up and leave. Lisbon was clearly as lost to her emotions as he.

"Lisbon, I'm going to take a shower and leave." Jane remarked casually refusing to pick their conversation up where they'd left off. "I wanted to wait until you woke up to do it."

He owed her better than sneaking out the door like he was ashamed of them and what they'd done.

Nothing could be farther from the truth.

Watching Lisbon close and lock the balcony doors, he glanced at his watch. He was normally gone by one or two at the latest the next day on the Friday nights he stayed over on her couch. And while he still had a good three or four hours before he had to go, he didn't think staying any longer was wise for any number of reasons.

For one, he didn't want to vary their pattern in case someone was watching. It wouldn't do to alert Red John things had changed between them. For another, Lisbon was looking at him in a way promising trouble. The kind he wasn't sure he could resist.

Not when his breath was already hitching at that gleam in her eyes and his growing arousal was becoming more painfully obvious with every passing minute.

Knowing he should be turning on his heel, Jane stood mesmerized instead as Lisbon sidled up to him pulling his face towards hers. Feeling his best intentions going down the drain, Jane wrapped his arms around her waist allowing Lisbon to stroke her tongue teasingly over his lips not fooling him for one minute. He'd already figured her out. What started slow and languid wasn't going to end that way. Allowing her to plunder his mouth and his senses, Jane refused to fully succumb to her pleasurable assault.

One of them had to retain a semblance of common sense.

"This can't happen again." Jane's gaze never wavered as he stared her down. "Once was already one time too many without the rest."

"I know." Lisbon said as she unbuttoned his shirt and ran her palms across his firm chest. "But we still have a couple of hours before you have to go. What do you say to making the most of them as we won't get another chance? We'll have the rest of the day and all of tomorrow to forget this ever happened."

Unbuckling his belt, Lisbon marveled that Jane was letting her undress him in spite of his words. Not only was he undressing her, he was slowly backing her towards the couch as he pulled her sleep shirt over her head. Smirking in triumph she forced her attention back to what he was saying.

"Do you honestly think you can do that?" Jane asked knowing he couldn't.

"No, but I can try." Lisbon confirmed what he already knew as she shoved him back on the couch and took charge of their encounter.

Catching Jane's eyes as he placed steadying hands on her hips, she wasn't all that surprised by the upward thrust seating her firmly where they both wanted her to be. Fortunately, she was more than ready for him. Watching her settling comfortably over him, Jane sent a silent thanks out there the blinds were already closed as they weren't making it upstairs.

Allowing Lisbon to set the pace of their love making, Jane marveled she hadn't been snapped up long ago. He'd always suspected the wealth of emotion she repressed in the name of professionalism poured out in the bedroom. He wasn't wrong. Lisobn was an incredibly passionate lover and more than enough woman for any man to handle. If he allowed himself to be honest, he'd like to a chance to prove he was the man who could do just that.

Handle Teresa Lisbon.

But, under the circumstances, he'd never get the chance to try.

However, she was right, that didn't mean they couldn't make the last of few stolen hours as unforgettable as they were meant to be.

He'd certainly never forget undressing Lisbon or his first sight of her naked. She'd blushed like an embarrassed schoolgirl and dared him to laugh. He'd found her beautiful beyond compare. And that perfect image was one he'd never banish from his head.

"Patrick, stop thinking, and start doing." Lisbon whispered against his lips deciding if this was truly going to be their last time, she didn't want to do all the work.

She wanted her last memory to be of Jane driving her insane and not the other way around.

Snorting at her open command, Jane raised a brow in challenge before flipping them over and giving Lisbon exactly what she demanded. If they ended up on the floor, she'd have no one to blame but herself.

She was the one who'd insisted on the couch when he'd much rather be making her scream on her much larger bed.

#####

A while later Jane opened his eyes to the restless shifting of his Lisbon blanket. He'd known the moment she'd come out of her satiated stupor as he'd felt the intensity of her thoughts. Whatever she was thinking wasn't good. He knew that from the soft sighs escaping her ever so often. The ones she didn't even know she was making.

"You know, this isn't fair." Lisbon captured his eyes with hers. "You don't want me but you'll keep messing up my dates won't you?"

"Probably." Jane admitted knowing he couldn't stand the thought of another man claiming what was his. "And I think I've put to lie the beginning part of your statement. I clearly want you, Teresa. I'm just not allowed to have you. He won't let me. It's as simple as that. The sooner you accept reality the safer you'll be."

"That's so not fair." Ignoring the harsh truth her lover had just uttered, Lisbon forced her tone to be far lighter than she felt. "Your screwing up my life because we can't be together."

"You don't really mind." Jane said softly.

"I don't suppose I do." Lisbon agreed.

"You don't want them anyway." Jane stated what they both knew.

"No, I don't." She didn't need to utter the silent truth hanging so harshly in the air between them.

She wanted Jane.

God knew she did. She'd told him often enough since Vegas and Lorelei. Since circumstances had forced her to admit a truth she still wasn't willing to say.

That was part of the reason she'd started dating again. And part of the reason she'd gotten her prescription renewed and taken the pills faithfully. Not so much because she'd expected to take a lover to her bed any time soon. She hadn't. Mashburn asides, she didn't work like that. But she'd hoped she was taking a step in the right direction towards getting a life again. It seemed she hadn't been wrong.

She just hadn't expected that step to be with Jane.

Not that they had a life together.

Just a prolonged one night stand fuelled by the knowledge it could never happen again.

"Do you think this is wise?" Jane stopped the wandering hand intent on inciting his libido once again.

"We're already screwed if anyone finds out, Jane." Lisbon reminded him. "Why wouldn't I want to have sex again?"

There was something frighteningly addictive about desperate sex she'd never experienced before. Or maybe it was simply the fact it was Jane. Somehow she doubted that. Yes, to a certain degree, it was the fact it was them. However, she doubted either of them would be so amorous if they didn't know this was all there could ever be. If something wasn't driving both of them to make the most it. No matter the cost.

"Oh, I don't know." Jane said. "Maybe because what I had with Lorelei was sex. What's between us is something entirely different. Physical intimacy based on deep emotional ties is anything but sex. It's far more devastating and unforgettable. And it's not something we should play around with. It's far too dangerous. The more we allow ourselves to indulge the forbidden, the more haunted we'll become by what we can never have."

Surprised by the intensity of her desire to slap Jane stupid for speaking about them in that tone, as though he was talking about complete strangers, Lisbon settled for shaking her head.

"I suppose that's true enough." Lisbon agreed. "It's one of the qualities about desperate sex making it so addictive. We could ask all the cheating spouses we've dealt with over the years and most of them would say some variation of what you just did. The recklessness of it all is hard to give up."

She could be equally detached when the sentiment was called for.

"Stop it, Lisbon." Jane said quietly not liking the feral look in her eyes.

"Stop what?" Lisbon asked. "Calling it what it is? I can assure you, I was pretty desperate to get into your pants…" She continued crassly. "And you know why. If Red John's coming after me…" Lisbon fought to keep the hitch out of her voice. "I wanted to know what it would be like to have you on me and in me just once. And I want to know what it feels like one last time."

"Stop it, Teresa." Jane shook her slightly knowing if he did it any harder she _would_ slap him stupid. "We are not talking about this anymore. And we're not making the last time we do this about anger or sorrow or lust or any of those other frantic, violent emotions swirling around in both of us. It's going to be beautiful."

"Oh, yeah?" Lisbon didn't resist the hands harshly gripping her hips although her voice had a defiant edge daring him to follow through on his promise.

"Oh, yeah." Jane said as flipped them over. "Because that's how I want you to remember us… As a passionate, beautiful encounter...Save your tough girl cop games for the lovers who don't know you. For the ones who don't mean anything. I know better."

"Whatever you say." Lisbon surrendered to Jane's prodding deciding if he could let her do as she pleased it was only fair she do the same.

It would be worth tearing her heart out and stomping it flat to be loved one last time by Patrick Jane.

#####

Feeling Lisbon shift on his chest as she awoke from her total collapse, Jane loosened his hold not particularly surprised when she propped up on his chest yet again.

The situation was getting more volatile the closer it came to ending. Not just on Lisbon's side either. He was fast deciding allowing this to happen…No, ensuring it happened…had not been one of his brighter ideas.

Walking away from the woman in his arms was proving much harder than he'd thought it would be.

Especially since she'd lain in his arms a short while ago and cried as though her heart were breaking.

"Do you feel anything, Jane?" Lisbon asked.

Resisting the urge to tastelessly remind her as they'd both indulged in more intercourse the past few hours than either of them had had in the past decade he had to have been feeling _something_; Jane chose a more diplomatic approach instead.

"I've already answered that." Jane pierced her with his gaze. "What do you think?"

"I don't know." She _knew_ he felt _something_.

Exactly what that something was she wasn't sure. Friendship, affection, lust…but what she'd thought she'd seen deep in his eyes? She wasn't sure it wasn't just wishful thinking on her part. That Jane was truly capable of feeling that emotion.

"Yes, Teresa, you do." Jane bluntly confronted her.

"Would you say it if you could?" Lisbon asked quietly. "Or would the words betray everything you hold dear?"

Lisbon couldn't bring herself to say "your wife" much less Angela's name at the moment. Her memory was just one more thing standing between her and Jane. She'd always been there as potently as Red John as much as she might try to deny it.

"What do you think?" Jane asked again.

"I don't know." Lisbon repeated.

Staring straight into her emerald gaze, he gave her question the consideration it deserved for both their sakes.

"Yes, Teresa, I think I would." Jane said quietly as he sat up and handed her the sleep shirt so hastily discarded. Watching her stick her arms through the garment before shimmying into it, Jane rose to his feel and pulled Lisbon with him. Weighing his words carefully, he decided she deserved honesty. To hear how he really felt. "In fact, I know I would."

Kissing the tip of her nose, Jane turned towards the stairs feeling her eyes boring intently into his back.

Speechless, Lisbon watched his hasty departure taking a deep, steadying breath as she struggled against shattering into a million jagged pieces. She hadn't expected Jane to level with her. She truly hadn't. He was much too slippery and evasive.

And now that he had?

It was all too much.

She couldn't handle it.

She didn't want to.

Hearing the shower turn on in the guest bath, she leaned back against the wall closing her eyes against roiling feelings better left unnamed.

Knees giving away beneath her, Lisbon slid slowly to the floor too emotionally exhausted to do anything more than leech the last of her remaining tears.

She was still sprawled in her corner a short time later as Jane slipped silently out the door.

#####

Walking into the bullpen, Lisbon wasn't surprised to see Jane already seated on the couch, cup of tea in hand, looking and acting as though they hadn't spent a passionate night and morning together. In other words, he was ignoring her. Shaking her head, Lisbon dismissed him with a glance before heading towards her office as she always did. Sinking in her chair lost in thought, she marveled she couldn't bring herself to say "making love" even in the recesses of her mind. As calm as she looked on the outside, she'd come completely undone if she did. It didn't matter in her soul of souls she knew that was exactly what they'd done.

And would never do again.

"Jane?" Lisbon looked up as he walked into her office without knocking softly closing the door behind him.

She knew she should have locked that door.

"You okay?" Jane asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?" She responded automatically as she glanced from him back to the files on her desk.

"Why would you be?" Jane quirked a brow at her evasiveness.

"Oh, I don't know, because I don't really have a choice?" Rising to her feet, Lisbon walked over to stand in front of him. "How about you?"

"About as good as you." Jane opened his arms as he continued their conversation inside a conversation.

Lisbon snorted at his seemingly innocent words. He wasn't lying. Jane looked about as much like hell as she felt.

Hesitantly staring at him, Lisbon finally allowed herself to step into his embrace and slide her arms beneath his jacket. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she felt his forehead against hers as they held each other in a fierce embrace. She wasn't at all surprised by the gentle kiss that followed. The one she returned with great passion but without promise.

Feeling the feather light brush of lips against the top of her head, she wasn't surprised when Jane released his hold and stepped back from her. Looking deeply into her eyes, his expression conveyed far more agony than ecstasy. Letting him go, Lisbon took her own step back before nodding her acceptance of what had to be. They both had to forget a day and a half ago they'd been locked in an amorous embrace saying far more than words every could.

She had to forget she'd been picking herself up off the floor and sticking herself back together with superglue and mattress stuffy shortly thereafter. It seemed Jane was still the only person causing her to come that undone. Why was she so surprised?

He was Jane.

"I'll see you out there." Jane said quietly. "We have a new case coming up the chain."

"I'll be out in a few." Lisbon digested this newest bit of information. A new case was just what she needed to get her mind off less pleasant things. "Tell the team I'm fetching the file and freshening my coffee. We'll convene in fifteen."

"Sounds like a plan." Jane repeated her words to Cho a lifetime ago as he walked out the door.

#####

Glancing over at Jane, Lisbon knew she was going to regret being locked in her SUV with the man for the half hour it would take getting to the crime scene. As much as they'd try, there was no way their conversation wasn't going to degenerate to the personal. Or to the hours they'd just spent together.

She wasn't sure she could handle it.

"Why don't we just get all of this over with so you can stop white knuckling the steering wheel." Jane's voice rent the silence. "Neither us regrets what happened and we don't have any reason to."

Except that it couldn't happen again.

Lisbon gave him a look saying far more than she was willing to put into words. Rolling his eyes, Jane prepared to tackle the doubts Lisbon had clearly allowed to come flooding back in spite of their earlier conversation. The one where they'd both admitted that, while neither of them was okay, they'd get over it eventually. And, yes, they both still had those feelings for each other that neither couldn convey in any other way than with a look now their weekend was over.

A look they'd both given each other this morning before he'd kissed her forehead and walked out her door.

Apparently that wasn't enough.

"Lisbon, you need to accept what was between us wasn't that bawdy encounter you had with Mashburn. While you no doubt had a good time; luckily for me, your emotions were already otherwise engaged. I'm not sure Walter felt the same. I think he could have grown quite fond of you had you allowed him. Where those feelings might have gone, who knows? You didn't take him up on his offer and you didn't wait around for his return so that chapter closed as it should have."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon said the words she'd been saying a lot lately without much heat.

"We were different." Jane continued as though she hadn't spoken.

"Right." Lisbon snorted.

"Do I need to describe how you looked? Throes of passion aside, your eyes betray your soul, Teresa, much as I'm sure mine did to you." Jane reluctantly admitted. "There was far more than pleasurable sensastions, heavy breathing, some moaning and groaning, and a ear splitting scream or two passing between us."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon repeated. "Don't be disgusting."

"You were far more erotic than disgusting, My Dear." Jane corrected her. "If you're honest, I think you will say the same."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon refused to look at him though her cheeks flushed a becoming shade of pink. "What about her?"

"Lorelei was a fascinating, irreparably damaged, demented creature not long for this world when I met her so whatever feelings I bore her were transitory. They were never meant to last. That being said, I was certainly never in love with her so you can consider that question laid to rest. She was also my best in with Red John." Jane calmly reminded her. "Even if it that meant going where he'd already been and taking his girl."

"Would you do it again?" Lisbon asked.

"You mean now that we've been together?" Jane asked as she already knew the answer if they hadn't.

"Yes." Lisbon stared out her side window not sure she could handle his answer.

"I like to believe I'd find another way." Jane answered honestly.

"But you're not sure." Lisbon said.

"I'm not a good man, Teresa." Jane said. "And while I want to be where you're concerned; maybe, I'm not capable of being everything I hope to be."

"You are a good man." Lisbon said firmly. "And you would find another way."

"I like to think I would." He'd certainly try with every atom of his being.

He couldn't do anything less for Lisbon.

"You wouldn't betray me any more that you did Angela." Lisbon firmly state. "Not even for Red John."

"No, Lisbon, I don't believe I would." Jane agreed quietly noting how her grip loosed perceptively on the steering wheel. "I don't think I could."

"Then you're right." Lisbon said quietly. "I don't regret a thing."

"Neither do I." Jane said as he reached into Lisbon's briefcase to remove a file.

Now that they'd laid the last of the ghosts to rest for the present, it was time to get back to work.

Reaching over to pat her hand, Jane was mildly surprised when Lisbon's fingers curled through his instead.


	7. Chapter 7

Staring at Cho's bumper, Lisbon resisted the urge to pass him. The man was driving much too slowly when she wanted this over with already. Tapping her fingers on the steering wheel, she admitted her impatience had everything to do with her choice of riding companion and nothing to do with the case. It certainly wasn't a perverse desire to get an eyeful of the very bloody crime scene she knew awaited her.

Murder-suicides were always messy. That was a given.

Then again, if this was a murder-suicide, why were they being called in? It obviously wasn't an open and shut as they often were. If it was, the file would have never crossed her desk. And Bertram would never have "asked" her team to take a look into things as a personal favor if there wasn't something off about the killings. Oh, and if the local Sheriff wasn't an old friend of long standing. Lisbon clicked her tongue in distaste. She was clearly in a damned if she did and damned if she didn't situation. The kind that reeked to the high heavens before she'd even had a chance to step in it.

Or Jane stepped in it for her.

Casting a disparaging glance in her companion's direction, Lisbon admitted she could have avoided a large part of her annoyance by demanding Van Pelt ride with her and Jane with the boys. She doubted her actions would have red flagged anything as it wouldn't be the first time such a thing had happened. In fact, he'd ridden with the boys plenty of times over the years…Just not recently...Anyways, her guys would have figured Jane had gotten on her last nerve yet again and they wouldn't be that far off.

Although exactly what he'd done to accomplish that feat would definitely surprise them far more than his wackiest antics in the past ever had.

Denying her the pleasure of his bed wasn't high in the catalog of things Jane usually did to piss her off. She doubted that one had even made the list. In fact, she knew it hadn't. She also knew there was far more to her frustration than just the physical. What was really sending her into orbit was Jane was denying them the right to explore the feelings so suddenly blazing to life between them. He didn't have that right. And, as far as she was concerned, assuming he did was just plain _wrong_.

If she was willing to take the risks, he should be willing to let her. She was a grown woman fully capable of evaluating her life and making her own decisions. She didn't want or need his protection. But, she did need him. In her life and in her bed.

Besides, ignoring what was between them was going to blow up in their faces…Maybe not today or tomorrow; but, soon…She could feel it in her bones and that was making her just plain edgy. Rolling her eyes, Lisbon fought an overwhelming urge to smack Jane just because she could.

Hard.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Jane." She said instead as she glanced briefly at the GPS realizing they were less than twenty miles from their destination.

"My mind isn't in the gutter." Jane corrected her.

"Yeah?" Lisbon questioned. "You're imagining me naked. Sounds like your mind's in the gutter to me."

"Why would you think that?" Jane shifted in his seat to gaze at her.

"I've seen that look enough recently to know exactly what you're thinking." Lisbon answered honestly.

"Then you should know I'm imagining you naked and up to something." Jane said innocently knowing the effect his words were having on her.

Fortunately, he was very much in control and showing no outward signs of his wicked thinking. He couldn't say the same for Lisbon. Her breathing had grown somewhat erratic and her pupils were definitely dilated. The woman was recollecting things she shouldn't.

"Bite me." Lisbon rolled her eyes in defeat knowing she'd never get one up on the man.

"Not the best come back for a time like this, My Dear." Jane said as he studied her profile. "Actually, in all seriousness, my mind wasn't in the gutter. Thinking about us and what we did is neither dirty nor something I'm ashamed of."

"It just can't happen again." Lisbon ignored the betraying hitch in her voice.

"Not because we don't want it too." Jane reminded her logically. "Because we both know such fleeting pleasures aren't worth your life."

"You're a complete idiot, you know that?" Lisbon shot him a heated glance. "All the years of dealing with that psycho have totally skewed your thinking. You're as messed up as he is in some respects.

Regardless of whether we bang like bunnies, I'm so already on the Red John Hit List. I have been for years. Ignoring that fact doesn't make it any less real.

Have you forgotten that whole bring him my head thing in Vegas? Or that bloody Calla Lily? We weren't doing the horizontal mambo then and he was already reminding both of us I have a target painted on my forehead."

"I haven't forgotten any of that." Jane softly agreed.

"Neither have I. I repeat. He's. Got. Your. Head. Totally. Screwed. Up. Every time you try to protect me by pulling away, he shows us just how stupid that line of thinking really is. He does something horrible anyway. You know it's true.

Why won't you just accept if he wants me, he's going to get me. Unless we stop him first which I certainly hope we do. It's going to happen whether you're in my life or not. You know it and I know it.

What we also know is, I'm not like those other women he's killed. I'm not defenseless. I'm packing serious heat and I know how to use it." Lisbon reminded him. "I'm a cop and I know he's coming. I won't be as easy to kill as they were."

"While that might be true, there are considerations other than Red John to think about." Jane reminded her.

"Like what? I've given it some serious thought and I'm not so sure." She'd done nothing but think since they crossed that line and not about her open cases. "If you start some cock and bull, lame brained rant about this not lasting or our feelings not being real or it just being sex between us, I will so shoot you without a second thought and I'll shoot you dead.

If you doubt it, take a look in my eyes."

From the look in her eyes and tone of her voice, Jane couldn't deny Lisbon was seriously put out with him though he doubted she'd go that far.

"I'm not the one ranting." Jane said softly knowing he wouldn't be either.

"Yeah, well, I think I'm going to rant some more. If those other _considerations_ concern work, since I've been shot, put on desk duty, suspended, and fired any number of times over the years because of you, I seriously doubt our being together can damage my career any more than it already is." Lisbon said realistically. "And I'm pretty sure they won't do much beyond a slap on the hand. If Bertram's Red John, he isn't ready to end the game. If he's not, he knows you solve too many cases and you've got too much dirt on people in really high places to mess with you too much.

Besides, you've shown them exactly how much of a pain in the ass you can be when they try to split us up. Why would anyone want to play that game? I don't think they would."

Jane was more than willing to cause heads to roll.

He'd already proven that.

"It's still not worth the risk." Jane said quietly.

"That's not your decision." Lisbon reminded him.

"As you're clearly not thinking as rationally as you should, I think it is." Jane's tone was soft and firm.

"Fine, then stop thinking about me naked." Lisbon stated just as firmly. "It makes me think about you naked and that hurts too damned much."

"Fair enough." Jane reached over to pat her hand grateful Lisbon didn't pull away from his touch.

"We're almost here." Lisbon said as a house surrounded by far too many police cars came into her line of vision.

Pulling her SUV onto the side of the road behind Cho's, she removed the keys from the ignition before turning to face Jane.

"Yes, it seems we are." Jane agreed. "You know this conversation isn't over."

"Maybe it's not." Lisbon reluctantly agreed knowing she wouldn't shut him down if he wanted to revisit the intolerability of their situation. It would be counterproductive to her goals. As long as they were talking, she had a shot at changing his mind. "But, right now we've got work to do. I suggest we both focus on that. Our issues will still be issues after the case is solved."

"Yes, we do." Jane agreed opening his car door as he glanced over at the team milling about on the sidewalk waiting on them.

And, as sorry as he was to admit it, Lisbon was exactly right. Their problems would still be here long after this case was solved unless something gave and he didn't see that happening any time soon. Red John wasn't going to.

Watching Lisbon slide out of the SUV, Jane watched her square her shoulders and assume work mode as though their conversation had never taken place. He admired that about the woman and he always had. She was ceaselessly dedicated to the job no matter what was happening in her personal life. He had no doubts she was already going over that checklist in her head preparing to analyze that crime scene to the nth degree once she finally set eyes on it.

Walking over to her team, Lisbon stopped in front of Cho secretly pleased at the way they all snapped a little straighter in her presence. Positive they'd been discussing something as inconsequential to the case as she had been prior to her arrival, it was apparent their attention was now on the matter at hand. Good. That was how it should be.

They were at a crime scene.

The victims deserved their full attention.

"Let's get a move on." Lisbon's tone was all business as she headed for the entrance of the attractive two story house and the Sheriff standing by the front door. "We have a job to do."

#####

Walking into the spacious family room, Lisbon stopped in her tracks absorbing the gruesome scene marring an otherwise welcoming home. At first flush, it was a classic murder-suicide as she'd been told. One parent offed the kids and spouse before shooting him, or her, self in the head. Who did what was the obvious question. Eyes flickering over the scene, there was something not sitting well with her.

She hadn't quite put her finger on it; but, _it_ was definitely there and already nagging at her.

"Crap, Jane, they didn't mention anything about this being a child murder." Lisbon commented instead not noticing how she leaned into his personal space more than usual.

"It's a family slaughter, Lisbon, not a simple child murder." Jane corrected her placing a steadying hand on her shoulder more to strengthen himself than his boss. These kinds of cases always hit him hard in the gut. "It was also made to look like a murder-suicide which it clearly isn't."

"How do you know that?" Lisbon asked as she drew a pair of latex gloves from her pocket. "That's exactly what the local PD thinks it is…A murder-suicide…Although if they were a hundred percent sure of that we wouldn't be here…." Masking her emotions, she knelt to get a closer look at the teen-aged daughter. "Only it was the mother doing the murdering and not the father as it usually is."

"Well, they're wrong. For one thing, women don't usually shoot themselves in the head." Jane said quietly looking anywhere but at that girl who was much too close to the age his daughter would be. "Or, in this case, they don't usually shoot their faces off."

"Not usually; but, it's not unheard of." Lisbon argued as she rose to her feet. "Maybe she and her husband were struggling when the weapon went off. From the looks of things it could have taken a while for him to die. Maybe he took her out before he did."

"The first shot incapacitated him." Jane continued studying the male body intently. "Besides, the angle of entry is all wrong for either scenario…These people were clearly murdered by someone having enough basic knowledge to make the crime scene pass at a cursory glance. When you really start picking the tableau apart, including how it _doesn't_ look, then you realize just how miserably they failed."

"You think so?" Jane turned at the sound of a foreign voice to find himself face to face with the Sheriff they'd met briefly outside.

"I know so." Jane said confidently. "Forensics will prove me out. For one thing, look at where the bodies fell. Patterson there was clearly trying to get to his wife when he was gunned down and she was trying to get to him. Not what either would be doing if she was the shooter. If you look closely, they were moved slightly and posed. Not a lot. Just enough to obscure what really happened. Lividity and that slight smearing of the blood pooling around the bodies will bear me out.

Oh, and this wasn't done by a scorned lover on either side. It's a stranger killing. A happy family destroyed by a whack job with a personal ax to grind. One I'm betting had nothing to do with any of these people beyond they fit some preconceived criteria in her head.

Yes, I said "her". I'm going so far as to say you've probably got a female serial killer on your hands."

Jane added with a bit of a flourish enjoying the way the condescending law enforcement officer's eyes widened at his words.

"Why would you say that?" Sheriff Benton turned disbelieving eyes in Jane's direction. "I don't see anything here indicating what you've said. The part about it not being a murder-suicide maybe I can go along with. We wouldn't have called you guys in if there hadn't been something hinky about the scene. But the rest of that spiel is pure hogwash."

"Don't think so, Sheriff." Lisbon stood up from examining the mother ignoring the moue of distaste on Jane's face that she could stomach such an up close and personal perusal of gory pulp and tissue. "Jane's usually right when he gets a hunch. I'll have Van Pelt start putting out feelers for similar murders in surrounding areas."

"You do that." The Sheriff said. "While we'll certainly support you, this is your ball of wax. That's why we called you in. My guys aren't up to handling something like this…Not if it turns out to be a Serial…Gale assures me you are and I hope he's right."

As much as he hated to admit this was over his Department's head, Benton wasn't a fool. He hadn't remained Sheriff for close to a quarter century by letting his ego override his common sense. If anyone ended up with egg on their face over this one, it wasn't going to be him. It would be the pretty lady radiating authority and her prettier sidekick pulling goofball theories out of thin air.

Bertram had warned him about the man's unorthodox methods; but, he'd also assured him Jane got the job done. Looking at the blonde haired man in the three piece suit, he had his doubts. What the hell kind of name was that for a man anyway? Jane? Like a girl. Whatever. As long as the man solved the case he didn't really care.

He hadn't stuck around as long as he had being dumb. He'd gladly play second fiddle close enough to those two to share the media glory for solving the case. He'd also remain far enough away to escape the fall out if they didn't. If the crap hit the fan, he didn't intend getting caught in the spray.

"Cho, finish the photographs in here." Lisbon motioned to the crime scene. "I'm going to check out the rest of the house and find Jane."

A Jane who had sneaked off while she was defending him to the Sheriff.

"Sure thing, Boss." Cho continued wondering where their Consultant had gotten off to now. "I think I saw him heading upstairs."

"I'm sure you did." Lisbon said as she headed for the stairs.

Goodness only knew what Jane was up to. Most likely getting into some form of trouble as that seemed to be what he did best…Next to solving cases of course. If she didn't miss her guess, she'd probably find him poking into closets and drawers uncovering secrets that were none of his business and seemingly irrelevant to the case on the surface. Fortunately, things were rarely as they seemed. It was usually the things he found out on these random forays that ended up breaking the case wide open.

"Jane, honestly, where are you?" Lisbon huffed as she ambled into the master bedroom. "I can't take my eyes off you for thirty seconds without you disappearing."

"I'm in here, Lisbon." Jane looked up as Lisbon came to stand in the bathroom doorway. "Evie Patterson was pregnant…Obviously still in the early days from the looks of things…If I don't miss my guess, when we start linking the cases, we're going to find all of the wives were in their first trimester."

"You can't be serious." Lisbon's horror showed on her face. "Oh, shit, you are serious."

"Yes, Lisbon, I'm perfectly serious." Jane agreed. "Her prenatal vitamins were in the kitchen cabinet by the sink and her anti-emetics are here in the medicine cabinet."

It seemed their victim was suffering from pretty severe morning sickness.

"You think that's the trigger." Lisbon took a step into the bathroom to take a look around.

"One of them, yes." Jane said as he watched her poke through the medicine cabinet looking at the unused pregnancy tests the woman hadn't needed and the half empty prescription bottles of the medications she had obviuosly recently stopped taking.

"We need to get back to the office so I can start putting out feelers to see if we can locate anymore murder-suicides with similar M.O.'s." Lisbon turned to walk out of the bathroom with Jane on her heels. "You do know we aren't going to be able to keep this nightmare out of the press? This situation is going to be hell before it's over. It's going to leave every pregnant woman with a husband and two kids in a panic and rightfully so."

"Not every pregnant woman, Lisbon, just the ones with a son in Middle School and a daughter in High School who are in their first trimester of pregnancy." Jane corrected her. "Our psycho is very specific in those aspects of her victimology."

"Right, like anyone's really going to listen to the voice of reason." Lisbon knew nothing could be farther from the truth.

"That people won't listen and believe what we tell them doesn't change the facts." Jane said rationally. "There're going to be a lot of people in a panic who shouldn't be."

"And that's going to make our jobs that much harder." Lisbon smacked her hand on the counter.

"Yes, it will." Jane agreed. "But that comes with the territory. What do you say we head back so we can get started on locating those other cases? The ones we know are out there no one else has bothered to find."

"I'd say that sounds like a good idea." Lisbon closed the medicine cabinet knowing their insanity was just beginning.

"Ladies first." Jane gestured in the direction of the open door.

"Right." Lisbon rolled her eyes. "What I don't get is how she's targeting her victims."

"While I can't be sure, I'd say it isn't that hard." Jane followed Lisbon out of the bedroom.

"How can you say that?" Lisbon asked. "It's not like Evie Patterson was showing. From what you've said, I doubt we'll find that any of the other women were either."

When they finally uncovered the other cases they were both already convinced were out there.

"You're making this much too hard, My Dear." Jane patted her shoulder in that way Lisbon hated. The one saying he knew so much more than she did. The sad part was he usually did. "While I can't prove it, I suspect our killer hacks into the computer systems of certain kinds of doctors to get her list of potential victims and their addresses. All the information she needs to narrow down her list would be in those databases. I think she checks out selected victims at home until she finds the one that meets her needs. From there she stalks them to learn their habits including the best time to strike. Once she's satisfied she's done her homework, that's what she does. Strike and the rest is history."

"You can't be serious." Lisbon knew he was and that they'd probably find the truth was not far removed from the scenario he'd just described.

"I'm perfectly serious." Jane followed her down the stairs. "While I can't be sure that's exactly how she operates, I'm sure it's close."

"Yeah, so am I." Lisbon agreed. "I think you're right and I think this case is going to be a bitch to solve. Things are going to get a whole lot nastier before they get better. I'd also say we're going to have more victims before she's caught."

Lisbon shook her head at the litany of curse words going around in her head. She'd have to remember to thank Bertram for this one. She really would. He had to have known what he was getting her into…He also had to be pretty confident Jane would solve the case or he wouldn't have put her team on it… Not stopping this psycho wouldn't look good for anyone…If there was one thing that man was all about it was self-promotion and generating good press for the Bureau...Talk about pressure…He was putting the screws on without saying a word.

"I'm going to leave the team here to finish wrapping up the crime scene while we head back. Cho can finish the pictures and diagrams while Wayne and Grace canvass for potential witnesses. You know you don't have to go back with me if you'd rather stay here. The choice is yours." Lisbon tossed over her shoulder as she headed towards their crime scene.

While there were certain risks in letting Jane run wild, she'd get a lot more done with him out of her hair.

"You know the answer to that." Jane said quietly as he followed her into the den.

"You're riding back with me." Lisbon stated unnecessarily.

"I'll start the murder boards while you start contacting other Agencies looking for similar cases." Jane stopped to take one last look at Evie Patterson carefully avoiding the ruins of her face.

Now that he knew she'd been with child, he could see the slight thickening of her waist not readily apparent at first glance. It was one of the things nagging at him sending him rummaging in search of answers. He'd known something was bothering him. He'd just not been sure what. Now he knew. He'd been detecting the faint, tell-tale signs of her pregnancy without realizing what he was looking at.

"I think that would be a good idea." Lisbon said as she walked towards the kitchen where she knew the Sheriff was hanging out. "Why don't you head for the SUV while I touch base with Cho and let Benton know we're leaving?"

"Sounds like a plan." Taking one last look around the crime scene, Jane turned on his heel and headed for the door.

Watching him leave, Lisbon caught Cho's eye. As soon as she brought her Number One up to speed on her plans, she'd say their goodbyes to the Sheriff and beat a path out of there. She had not doubts they'd be burning the midnight oil every night until this case was closed. There was a nut job out there that had to be stopped. None of her team would rest until she was. Lisbon was sure of that.

A panicked public wouldn't let them even if they wanted to.

#####

_Three weeks later_

Leaning back in her chair, Lisbon studied the miniature murder board Jane had made for her office that first day that mirrored the larger display in the bullpen. This case was proving more complex than they'd anticipated. They'd discovered a sixth case, and knew there were bound to be more, in a Podunk town a couple of hours away from Sacramento on the California-Nevada border with the same M.O. just today.

One indicating the wife had slain her spouse and two children in a jealous rage.

It was another case now going from simple murder-suicide to the far more complex murder by serial killer. And Lisbon's favorite kind of case considering Jane handled them so well. Especially when there were children involved. Female children close to his daughter's age. The strain was already showing in his face. The man looked harried as they all did. Fortunately, he hadn't yet degenerated into his wild and woolly phase. His appearance was still neat and in-control as she needed him to be.

Walking over to the display to tack another photograph to the board, Lisbon glanced at her watch in disbelief. Where had the time gone? The past four hours had passed in a blink and she still wasn't any closer to a breakthrough than she'd been when she'd started following her current train of thought. Gazing at the photograph littered with bodies, she wondered how the heck anyone could have thought _that _was ever a murder-suicide.

Given the sloppiness of the crime scene, this was clearly one of their perp's first goes at killing anyone. From the looks of things, she'd made mistakes if they could identify them. She needed to have the Forensics re-examined. Who knew? With a new team going over trace with a fine tooth comb from a different angle, they might find evidence overlooked the first time around. Like maybe blood belonging to the murderer and not the victims. Not that that would necessarily help them all that much with no suspects at hand; but, it would be something tangible to use down the road when they did.

Studying the victims' photographs, Lisbon decided even though the bodies were long gone, it might behoove them to visit the crime scene and pay a visit to the local PD. She'd look into a road trip tomorrow. At a good three hours one way, the town was far enough away she could probably justify staying over one night and possibly two. She'd clear it through the appropriate channels from home tomorrow. Maybe everything would be in place for them to hit the road by the following day when her team returned from the day of rest she'd given them.

Turning at the sound of her door opening, Lisbon wasn't all that surprised to see Jane entering looking the worse for wear. He was the only person daring to enter her domain without knocking. Quirking a brow, she watched him lock the door behind him before walking over to stand beside her. It was apparent this last case was taking a toll on him. It was weighing on all of them; but, especially Jane.

"What are you still doing here?" Lisbon asked. "I told all of you to go home a long time ago."

Not only that, she'd told her team not to come back into the office until the day after tomorrow as they were all ready to drop. Actually considering it was well past midnight, they'd be coming in tomorrow hopefully well rested and raring to go. They'd been burning the midnight oil seven days a week the past three weeks and had earned a well deserved, if much too short, break. Lisbon wished she could say the same for herself. As TL, her work was never done.

"I'm not leaving until you do." Jane quietly reminded her. "You already know that."

"Don't be ridiculous." Lisbon reached up to touch a haggard cheek. "You don't have to worry. I can take care of myself."

"Right." Jane rolled his eyes at her. "That's why you fell apart earlier today."

"I wasn't expecting that." Lisbon defended herself. "None of us were and we still haven't found the latest victim."

Hanging her head, Lisbon couldn't accept she'd totally lost it when they'd returned from lunch on the terrace to find a bloodied rose resting smack in the center of her desk. Fortunately, only Jane had been with her at the time. He'd closed and locked her door before the rest of the team got wind of what was going down while she'd efficiently bagged the evidence with tremoring hands. She'd then all but collapsed weeping in his arms.

"There isn't necessarily another victim yet." Jane reminded her. "We don't know where he got the blood."

"There's another victim." Lisbon said. "She just might not be dead yet. Just what we need…another Red John kill on top of this."

She gestured in the direction of her murder board.

"No, that bloody rose on your desk earlier today _was_ what we needed. It's a wakeup call we need to be more careful. Remember the shark already circling in the water." Jane corrected her. "As you're still alive and we can keep you that way, I'd say you're more important than any of this. We can't afford to forget that.

All we can do for any of them is find whoever is responsible for taking their lives and make them pay."

"We can stop her from killing again." Lisbon reminded him.

"Yes, we can." Jane agreed. "And we will; but, not at the cost of your safety."

"Which is why you didn't go home." Lisbon said softly. "You're guarding me."

"Among other things." Jane agreed.

"It's too much." Lisbon said quietly. "On top of the rest of this, dealing with his crap is just too much."

"It's just a warning." Jane calmly reminded her. "I don't think it's anything to be overly concerned about. He just doesn't want to get lost in the mix or be forgotten."

"Like that could ever happen." Lisbon snorted.

"We are working another serial killer case." Jane stated the obvious. "It's a very high profile case being splashed across every major news channel across the country. Maybe the world. Red John doesn't like sharing his billing and certainly not with a woman. Think about it. Some idiot in the media might make the mistake of touting our girl as being more of a badass than he is.

She is targeting whole families instead of predominantly women."

"I hope not." Lisbon said sincerely knowing they'd have another body on their hands if they did. "That's just what we need…Competing serial killers."

"Prepare yourself, Teresa, it may very well happen." Jane said what she didn't want to hear.

"Not what I wanted to hear even if it is the truth." Lisbon said as she unconsciously gravitated closer to Jane finding it much too hard to stay away even knowing she should.

Contrary to what they'd both expected, they hadn't had a chance to revisit them or their "issues". They'd been much too busy dissecting the new files rolling in on their female serial killer.

"I'm sorry." Jane said. "I'm not going to lie to you."

"I don't want you to." Lisbon said as she reached out to place her hand on his chest.

"Good, because I'm not going to." Jane rested his hand lightly on her hip.

Looking at the placement of their hands, Lisbon sighed knowing they were always going to end up here. They'd opened Pandora's Box that night and there was no locking their feeling back inside. It just wasn't happening.

No matter how hard they tried.

Deciding what the hell, Lisbon reached up to pull his lips down to hers. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she didn't ask permission. She simply took what she wanted. Not that Jane seemed to be resisting at all from the avid tangling of his tongue with hers. She wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry at the stupidity between them. For the moment, she was accepting that things would happen as they happened. Their relationship, or lack of one, simply was what it was until something changed.

Jane would be a broken record saying it couldn't happen again and she'd play along with him. Even knowing it would. Happen again. In moments when they were both too weak to fight it.

Moments like now.

Moments when they were exhausted, concerned, and desperately in need of reassurance everything would be alright though nothing could be farther from the truth.

Lisbon was just happy he wasn't resisting her. That Jane was kissing her back for all he was worth. With his eyes closed. Who knew Patrick Jane kissed with his eyes closed? Like a girl. Well, not exactly like a girl because he was definitely a guy…But anyway, she'd have to remember to give him hell about that one…_She_ was the one who kissed with her eyes closed. That was why she didn't know he did, too.

Or he did some of the time.

Feeling the first button of her blouse come undone through a lust filled haze, Lisbon sprang into action halting the persistent fingers up to no good.

"Patrick, be reasonable." Lisbon appealed to his common sense having a feeling she was going to have to put her foot down more forcefully before she was done. "We're in my office at the CBI in the middle of a case."

"It's nearly three a.m. and the last Agent other than the ones on call two floors down went home three hours ago. The cleaning crew was gone long before that." Jane corrected her. "There isn't anyone left to find out."

"Not here, Jane." Lisbon stated firmly. "Not in my office. Not on my couch. Not where you're always sitting. I can't take it when you shut me out again. Professionalism, or lack of it, aside, I can't take seeing us together like that every time I see you sitting there and knowing it can't happen again."

"Then I'll follow you home." Jane suggested confidently knowing she wouldn't turn him down.

"Let me get my stuff." Lisbon said deciding, while taking him home wasn't necessarily what she'd intended when she'd kissed him, she'd take what she could get.

Then again, if she was honest, maybe that was exactly what she'd wanted. She'd known things getting out-of-hand was certainly a risk when she'd pressed her lips against his. Whatever her intent, she knew the more entangled she got with Jane the less likely either of them would be able to break free and that was perfectly fine by her.

"Don't." Jane returned the files she was preparing to stuff into her briefcase back to the open drawers. "Leave all of that here. You won't be working any time soon."

Hopefully, she'd be asleep when he snuck out and she'd stay that way. He wasn't the only one looking more than a little haggard around the edges. Lisbon looked rough with those dark circles under her eyes and he didn't like it. Especially knowing the situation between them was adding to her strain.

As much as he wished he could walk away as he knew he should, and had fully intended, the impossible woman was proving he couldn't time and again. Maybe he should just give in to what they both wanted. On the one hand, the idea was much too tempting and it would make life so much easier on the both of them. On the other, he wouldn't survive if something happened to Lisbon because they were together.

"Stop thinking, Jane." Lisbon walked over to pull his face down to hers. "Don't make me do something I'll never forgive you for because you're balking on me. I'll make your life hell in ways you never saw coming. That's a promise."

If she had to see them like that every time she looked at her couch, Jane _would_ live to regret it.

"I'm not balking, Teresa." Jane said in defeat knowing he needed her just as badly as she needed him. "Perhaps questioning the wisdom of our actions; but, I'm definitely not balking."

"That's good to know." Lisbon tucked the strap of her briefcase over her shoulder and grabbed her purse. "You ready to go?"

"I don't need to get anything if that's what you're asking." Jane stuffed his hands in his pocket feeling the sudden awkwardness hanging in the air between them.

"Then go already." Lisbon snarked as she felt her cheeks turn red at his knowing smirk. What should be easy and natural was suddenly strange because of how they were going at it. "If you make this hard for me when we get to my place, I'm so going to kick your ass."

"As it's already hard for you, I'd say you're going to kick my ass anyway." Jane quipped knowing if she hit him with all the pent up frustrations radiating off of her, he was going to be hard put to keep up with her in the first place. Not that he was complaining. Just mentally preparing to handle whatever game Lisbon brought to the table...er, mattress...whatever.

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon stepped from behind her desk and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"Teresa, it's going to be okay." Jane caressed her arm reassuringly in passing.

"Yeah, it is." Lisbon tossed over her should accepting his lie at face value.

And it would be.

Until Jane decided to sneak out that door again.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Anna, Tina, and other guests, thank you for the reviews and for enjoying this story. ~Calla

#####

Opening her car door and standing up, Lisbon waited for Jane to park in one of the guest parking places and join her. Satisfied he was making his way across the asphalt at a brisk pace, she surveyed the area one final time reasonably content nothing was off kilter. None of the vehicles were unfamiliar and no-one was lurking where they shouldn't be. So much for her partner's paranoia Red John was watching their every move. It didn't appear he was or, if she was wrong, he was being super sneaky about it. While she didn't think so, there was no denying that was always a possibility. He'd never played fair.

"I thought you'd never get here." She commented as Jane fell into step beside her.

"While I wasn't the one driving like a bat out of hell tonight, I was right behind you." Jane shared what she'd failed to notice as she'd been too busy weaving in and out of the heavier than normal traffic for this time of the morning.

Watching her, Jane bit his tongue knowing better than to comment on Lisbon's three failed attempts to open the door with shaking hands before finally successfully pushing it wide. The woman would kill him.

"Yeah, well, I had somewhere to be." Lisbon dismissed her uncharacteristically erratic driving as she dropped her purse and briefcase in the foyer before slamming Jane none-to-gently against the door. "And someone to be with."

"Is that so?" Jane asked as he angled her a little closer to where he wanted her to be.

"Oh,yeah." Lisbon licked her lips nervously. "So much for this not happening again right?"

While she didn't think he'd changed his mind, it _was_ Jane she had pinned between her and an unforgiving slab of wood.

"You have a way of making me forget the rules." He pulled her a little closer enjoying the untamed moment between them.

"Like that's hard to do." Lisbon smirked "You've never been that good at sticking to the rules in the first place." She teased him with a kiss. "Not even your own."

Thank God for small blessings. Including the ones she never thought she'd be grateful for. They'd never be here like this if he was.

"You may be right." Jane agreed as he released the first button on her silky blouse pleased she made no attempt to stop him.

He wasn't a hundred percent sure how the evening would play out in spite of Lisbon's actions so far. She would be well within her rights to change her mind. To decide a few stolen hours weren't worth the pain that would follow. Besides, neither of them had approached the other in over three weeks. Not in this way. Not since they'd gotten their newest case.

Oh, they'd ridden to the crime scenes together. They'd even had dinner at the office with the team a few times. That was routine and it hadn't changed.

But, there'd been no stolen kisses or comforting touches. No private conversations in her office concerning them. No remotely unprofessional glances or off color comments as there should have been. They'd certainly not indulged in any of the flirtatious banter they often did. Honestly, he'd been in hell since their last encounter and he'd missed her terribly. From the look in her eyes, she'd missed him, too.

"I am." Lisbon watched him intently knowing what his next move should be and curious what it would be.

Jane was being far too hesitant as though he thought she might change her mind. Or, perhaps, he thought he was giving her time to come to her senses. He was being an idiot as usual and he wasn't the only one. She was having similar thoughts which were utterly ridiculous. They'd both had time for all of that on the drive to her place.

"There's been too much death the last few days." Jane suddenly blurted into the silence as if that gave them license to do what they'd both agreed they shouldn't but were going to do.

"Yes, there has." Lisbon agreed as she watched him undoing the next button on her blouse.

There had been too much death the last few days and Red John hadn't had a thing to do with any of it. Not yet, or not that they'd discovered yet, was probably the more accurate statement. He'd had plenty to do with the case before this and he'd probably have plenty to do with the one coming after, but not this one. The psycho had meant it when he'd let them know via Lorelei and that long destroyed disk that he was starting to kill again.

It was just that a monster more horrible than him, if that were possible, had beaten him to it.

This one killed whole families and _she'd_ killed six in the past eighteen months. She and Jane were positive their murderer was a murderess although the other law enforcement agencies clearly thought they were nuts. Personally, Lisbon's money was on her Mentalist and his farfetched theory. She didn't doubt for one minute there was a whacko hiding in the shadows targeting the perfect families at the point her psychoses converged in her head.

In fact, Jane had christened her The Convergent Killer.

He'd coined the phrase to keep the Press from dubbing her something ridiculous like the "Blue Moon Killer" because one of her executions happened to occur on the night of a legitimate Blue Moon. Or that was the explanation he'd given Bertram when he'd been called to the carpet for speaking to the piranhas in the first place.

Lisbon suspected it was something totally different. That his naming her anything in his Memory Palace had far more to do with the theory developing in his head than the media vultures looking for blood. Like the fact she didn't strike until whatever event she was re-enacting in her head had taken place within the family she'd targeted for slaughter.

Or, more likely, the event preceding whatever trauma had begun her descent into a madness justifying the taking of innocent lives to wipe away her pain.

While he wasn't sure what had taken place, Jane had ideas he wasn't yet ready to share with the rest of the team though he'd shared bits and pieces with her. It was seriously scary shit as Cho would say. But, she thought he was on to something. As they still had time before the whackadoodle struck again, if she didn't escalate as everyone was praying she wouldn't, no one was pressuring her Consultant to say anything before he was ready. They were simply letting him work the Jane hunch as he'd been doing since the start.

In fact, none of the agencies involved had connected the dots until the last slaughter when she and Van Pelt had search for similar "murder-suicides" in California and neighboring states. They'd hit the jackpot within the first few hours. After alerting the necessary parties in three other states their _Serial Killer_ was now operating on her turf, Lisbon hadn't been surprised the files had started pouring in the next day.

Their lives had been hell ever since.

Feeling another button come undone, Lisbon couldn't believe she'd gotten that lost in her thoughts in the middle of Jane undoing her blouse. That his fingers still hovered over that third button indicated he'd done exactly the same…Gotten totally lost in similar thoughts. They both took their jobs much too seriously at times. Times like now when they were getting nowhere and the bodies were stacking up.

Looking up, Lisbon saw the hesitancy still clouding Jane's eyes. As determined as he was to seduce and be seduced against both of their better judgments, he wouldn't act without her continued consent. Given his inclination to steam roll over everything in his path when he wanted something, she should appreciate he wasn't doing the same to her at the moment. But, she didn't. He'd started them in this direction and she wanted him to finish.

"Patrick, stop being a gentleman." Or a considerate partner and lover or whatever he thought he was being. "The sooner we're both naked and up to something the happier we'll be."

Jane couldn't help laughing at her words as she slapped his hands away in her typical take charge fashion.

"I'm going to say this once, and only once, work stays at work from now on." Lisbon said firmly. "Here….Here, it's just you and me."

"I like the sound of that." Jane agreed running his fingers through her hair deliberately ignoring the fact she was speaking like this was going to continue happening and he was going to let it. Even a realist needed to pretend every now and then. Even if he wasn't given to fantasy in his personal life, he'd become quite good at it over the course of his work. "You and me."

He did like the sound of it and, like Lisbon; he couldn't believe either of them had gotten so lost in the case they'd sacrifice a few precious moments of their time together. Then again, he could. Neither of them coped well with dead babies. Or dead children for that matter and there were plenty of both here.

"I thought you'd see it my way." Leaning into his kiss, Lisbon took great pleasure in the feel of his lips against hers.

Running her hands over his chest, she appreciated the play of muscle beneath her palms almost as much as she appreciated they weren't already ripping at each other's clothes. She'd missed the man holding her so tightly against him. Not just the mind numbing sex; but, the emotional closeness between them as well. The case, and Jane's stubbornness, had left little time for such intimacies. It seemed that connection between them had suffered greatly for it. Fortunately, they seemed to be recapturing some of what they'd lost through kisses more coaxing than hungry and enticing touches against covered skin.

Breaking their kiss, Lisbon took Jane by the hand and led him upstairs to her lair. Standing in front of her closet mirror, she tugged at his dark jacket laughing at how Jane readily capitulated to her silent determination to divest him of both coat and vest. She hoped he would be as cooperative when she got to the rest of his clothing. A naked Jane was a sight to behold and one she hadn't seen in much too long.

It was also a sight she was past impatient to see.

"Is that you way of saying the time for wining and dining is over?" Jane quirked a brow at her as he tossed her shirt on the chair over his jacket.

"Something like that." Lisbon decided the man caught on fast as she leaned in to unbutton his shirt as Jane unbuttoned her slacks. "Although I can get you that glass of wine if you really want it."

Running her hands over Jane's chest, she shoved his shirt off his shoulders before turning her attention to his belt buckle. Fortunately his shoes and socks had already disappeared somewhere between her den and the second story landing so she didn't have to worry about them.

"I don't think that's necessary." Jane flashed her that devilish smile making her heart beat out of her chest as he slid her pants down her legs enjoying the sight of her wearing nothing but her bra and panties.

It was that familiar leer saying he was up to something and he wasn't apologizing for it.

"Good. I'd really hate to stop what I'm doing." Lisbon's attention didn't waver as she unbuttoned his pants.

"I'd hate for you to stop." Tossing her undergarments aside, Jane closed his eyes against the feel of her hand intimately cupping him as she expertly stripped him bear and backed him towards her bed.

"Oh, I'm not stopping anything." Lisbon all but grunted at him not caring how she sounded.

She was too busy enjoying the sight of a naked Jane beneath her and the feel of him buried deep within her.

The strong hands at her hips relentlylessly driving their rhythm silently seconded her opinion.

#####

Rousing in spite of Jane's care in slipping from her bed, Lisbon pretended she still slept. Knowing she wasn't fooling either of them, he wasn't calling her on it. Instead, Jane continued buttoning his shirt and slipping into his slacks as though she were happily snoring away. Staring as he fastened his vest and slid into his jacket, she closed her eyes knowing he was going to turn in her direction at any moment for one final look. It was all she could do not to let her eyelids flutter when she felt his lips brush chastely against her skin. Watching him walk out of her bedroom, Lisbon ignored the tears leaching from her eyes choosing to scrub them away with her fists instead.

Shaking her head, she wanted to slap herself. She didn't sign up for this when she let him crawl between her sheets. The man was ripping her to shreds without even trying and she was letting him. How damned stupid could she get? She'd known the score from the start.

To give him credit, from the haunted look in his eyes, Jane wasn't escaping unscathed. He was as she was. If not more so.

She wasn't the one who'd lost everything never believing she deserved a second chance. And she wasn't the one who felt compelled to turn down the second chance she so desperately wanted. The one she never saw coming... Jane was…and he was hurting as bad as she was.

Sitting up and running a hand through her hair, Lisbon couldn't stop the thoughts roiling around in her head. When had her life gotten so complicated? She couldn't answer that. She honestly couldn't. Or maybe she could….

It was the moment she'd first coaxed a reluctant Jane into her bed.

She had no one to blame for that but herself.

Tossing the sheets aside, Lisbon threw her legs over the side of the mattress as she heard the front door close behind him. Rising to her feet, she walked naked into her bathroom feeling no compulsion to wander downstairs to check her door. She was certain Jane had turned every lock. Plugging her tub, she turned the water on full throttle before upending a cap of a sweetly floral bubble bath under the stream.

As much as she preferred her spicier fragrance, she needed to mask the scent of Jane still clinging to her skin. Not pick one blending with his as her usual bubble bath did. Slipping beneath the bubbles, she sank down in hot, aromatic water up to her chin. Leaning her head back against the rim, she closed her eyes. She refused to cry again…wasn't going to happen…even if the scent of Jane still made her tear up…She was so done with the waterworks. Besides, it wasn't the smell of Jane that was so hard to get rid of. It was the memories of skin on skin and of having him so intimately in her and on her that were doing her in.

In spite of the less than flattering things she could say about Patrick Jane the Consultant, she had no complaints about the man as a lover. Well, she had one and it was major. But she wasn't concentrating on the whole "Red John won't let us be together." aspect of their affair. She was thinking about the toe curling facets instead.

The ones saying he was considerate and passionate and generous in all the right ways. Not at all put off when she needed their coupling more on the rough than the tender side. He'd certainly given her what she wanted tonight and he'd looked breathtaking doing it. She'd probably have a few pleasurable twinges she hadn't anticipated to remember him by. She'd certainly have a few bruises. Not that she was complaining. She'd asked for everything she'd gotten and then some…They'd both been rather desperate.

Pouring body wash on her puff, Lisbon scrubbed her arms deciding none of this would be so bad if all she'd done was fall in lust with an incredible lover. She wasn't stupid enough to stay with a man she didn't love because he was good in bed. Or even one she did love who was bad for her. She wasn't that kind of woman and she never had been. Even Jane couldn't turn her into someone she wasn't.

Truthfully, she'd never really stayed with anyone all that long. Not since Greg and never since she'd been an adult. Since she'd become a cop. A downside to being so dedicated to her job. It didn't leave a lot of time to work on relationships. Or even to simply keeping them going for that matter. It was easier when things got complicated to go or "get gone" as she'd always called it in her head.

That being said, Jane wasn't bad for her. Or she didn't think he was. They were actually good for each other in a lot of ways not the least of which was a shared obsession. They both wanted to catch the bad guys even if their methodology wasn't the same. One bad guy in particular. Maybe he wasn't the best thing to happen to her career. And he came with a lot of unnecessary baggage and aggravation; but, she enjoyed having him around. In fact, that was where the rub came in.

She couldn't imagine life without him as she'd fallen head over ass in love with the man long before they'd ever become lovers.

If she had to place a bet, she'd say he felt the same even if he was kind of wiggy about admitting it.

Standing up, Lisbon pushed the lever unplugging the tub before reaching for her bath sheet. Hastily wiping the bubbles away, she wrapped her towel around her, slathered deodorant under her arms, and wandered into the bedroom to find a pair of panties. Settling on a nude pair of string bikinis she padded into the guest room to rummage through "Jane's" closet. It wasn't like there was much there. Just a pair of shoes exactly like the ones he wore every day, a spare suit complete with vest, and two dress shirts. One white and the other pale blue. There were probably a couple of ties he never wore, clean socks and underwear tucked in one of the dresser drawers but she'd never really checked.

Nabbing the blue shirt from its hanger, Lisbon dropped her towel and stood mostly naked in front of the mirror. Sliding her arms into the shirt, she buttoned all but the top three buttons before carrying her damp towel back into her bathroom and tossing it in the hamper. Turning off the upstairs lights, she headed downstairs. It wasn't like she was going back to sleep any time soon. She might as well have a snack and see if there was anything worth watching on television. With any luck, she'd fall back to sleep by midday. She could use a few extra hours of shut eye before she returned to work tomorrow.

Wandering into her den, Lisbon flopped on the couch. Picking up the channel changer, she already knew there was nothing she wanted to see. Closing her eyes as she absently picked at the hem of her shirt, Lisbon decided she was an idiot a hundred times over. Her actions in donning Jane's shirt had wiped away any mental headway she'd made during her long, painful soak. She'd spent the first half hour of that bubble bath berating herself for being weak and the last half hour scrubbing off the smell of Jane still clinging to her skin and hair.

Unfortunately, it wasn't quite that easy to wash away the memories of his touch.

Feeling restless, she rolled to her feet, walked into the kitchen, and grabbed a package of popcorn from the box in her cabinet. Plopping it in the microwave and punching the buttons, she opened the refrigerator debating whether she wanted a glass of juice or a glass of Cola. Deciding on the soda, she filled her glass and snagged her popcorn from the microwave. Walking back into the den and settling on the couch, she hit her favorite movie channel. There had to be something there among the new releases she hadn't seen.

Finally giving up, Lisbon turned off the television and tossed the remote aside.

Maybe she'd listen to music and read those Forensics magazine articles she'd been meaning to read for the last few months. She might find something new and interesting that would help them out on this case. She'd done it before. However, what she really needed to do was get some rest. She'd definitely included herself when she'd given her team the day off before they hit the files bright and early in the morning. Her little rendezvous with her secret lover had shaved several hours off the available time she could be snoozing and her butt was dragging even if she was trying to ignore that fact. Concentrating on the newest methods of analyzing trace would take her mind off of things she'd rather not think about. It would also probably lull her into some much needed sleep.

Rising to her feet yet again, Lisbon walked over to pluck the magazines off the shelf as she grabbed the remote for her CD player. Making her way back to the couch, she stopped at the sound of soft knocking against her door.

Wondering briefly who could possibly be out there, she hoped it wasn't the ditzy kid upstairs having another spastic fight with her boyfriend. That always turned out to be much ado about nothing. Marty and Goth Boy would probably end up married and living the new American Dream. Barring a few melodramatic fights where they tossed designer pillows at each other and practiced their favorite swear words of course.

She'd already been there and done that a couple of times. It had been all she could do to keep a straight face and not laugh the young couple out of their home. She'd given William a lecture about staying out too late playing video games with his friends the first time and Marty a lecture on not calling home when she was going to be three hours late another. If that was as bad as it got…Hallelujah. She could handle it.

Just not tonight.

God save her from two twenty-something trust fund babies who, while certainly not rich, could live comfortable middle class existences the rest of their twerpy little lives without hitting a lick at a snake. They had no idea what reality truly was and, honestly, maybe they were the better for it. At least they seemed happy.

Actually, she'd put money on the fact they were happy.

Or maybe her unwanted guest was Hannah from around the corner needing her to get Mitzy from the top of her refrigerator. If she'd told her elderly friend once, she'd told her a dozen times, that cat was fully capable of getting herself down as easily as she'd gotten up there. It was simply a matter of letting her decide she was ready. If she'd wanted a kitty that liked to stay closer to the ground, she should have gotten a different breed.

Hearing the knock gaining in momentum, Lisbon realized she didn't have time to go to her room and change. Whoever was out there would simply have to think she had a gentleman caller hidden somewhere. While that might have been true earlier, it wasn't now. Sending up a silent prayer it wasn't Cho or another member of her team as they'd surely recognize her attire, Lisbon glanced through the peephole before reluctantly opening the door.

"Jane, what are you doing back here?" Lisbon let him in. "I thought you'd be long gone by now."

Locking the door behind him, she didn't miss his obvious surprise at what she was wearing. Fortunately, he chose not to comment for which she was grateful. She wasn't sure how she'd explain having gone into his things to deliberately pilfer one of his freshly laundered shirts. Truthfully, she couldn't beyond saying she'd wanted to be close to him and she so wasn't admitting that. Trailing him into the kitchen, she wasn't surprised when he busied himself making a cup of tea.

"I've been sitting in the park for the past hour watching the sun come up." Jane turned from the sink where he was filling the kettle and motioned in the direction of the parking lot. "I came back because I suddenly realized I've changed my mind."

He set the kettle on the burner and turned the knob to the appropriate setting before flipping the switch on Lisbon's coffee maker knowing everything was already good to go. She ground her beans, added water, and situated her filter the night before. The less she had to do in the morning, the happier she was.

"About what?" Lisbon asked as she leaned back against her counter.

"About us." Jane said honestly. "And about this."

He nodded in the direction of the pale blue shirt she was wearing.

"Just like that?" Lisbon's tone was skeptical.

"No, not just like that." Jane called her on her foolishness. "I've been giving our situation serious thought since you first propositioned me on the terrace."

"I didn't proposition you." Lisbon said. "I kissed you. There is a difference."

"Yes, I suppose there is." Jane agreed. "But your kiss said you wanted more."

"I suppose it did." Lisbon didn't try to deny it.

"Trust me, it did." Jane reached out to pull the ponytail holder from her hair.

"So you didn't just show up in my office earlier tonight intent on letting me seduce you?" Lisbon asked.

"No, I don't suppose I did." Jane concurred as he ran his fingers through her hair. "I hadn't quite made up my mind about all of this; but, I knew I wanted to be with you again."

"Yeah, well, sometimes you shouldn't have what you want." Lisbon said softly enjoying the feel of his blunt nails against her scalp.

"While that may be true, I _needed _to be with you." Jane corrected his earlier statement.

"Maybe. But sometimes you shouldn't have what you think you need." Lisbon gauged his expression from beneath her eyelashes. "You can't keep tearing me up inside, Jane, and I can't keep letting you."

Not even if she _needed _him just as much.

"I know. It's tearing both of us up inside." Jane agreed. "That's why something has to give."

"What?" Lisbon held her breath waiting for his answer.

"Us." Jane said calmly. "I think we should just be together. Not rub the reality in anyone's face; but, not go to great lengths to hide it either."

"Just like that?" Lisbon stared at him in disbelief. "Did you hit your head somewhere between here and your car?"

"No, not just like that." Jane rolled his eyes at the déjà vu. He wasn't going to keep repeating himself. He wasn't letting Lisbon keep doing it either. "We need to discuss the situation and decide how best to handle things."

Things being Red John first and the fallout at work second.

"You've lost your mind." Lisbon grabbed her favorite ceramic mug from the dishwasher and poured a cup of coffee adding a goodly amount of cream and sugar.

"No, I haven't. I simply decided you were right." Jane admitted. "I'm being foolish in believing we'll stay apart and stupid in thinking we could ever hide what's between us when we both know we can't."

"What changed your mind?" Lisbon couldn't resist asking.

"This last case." Jane admitted honestly. "Either of us could be gone in a flash without knowing exactly what this thing is between us."

"I think we know." Lisbon said quietly. "We just haven't taken the opportunity to explore anything beyond the physical."

Largely because he'd been too busy reminding her it couldn't happen again. And she'd been too determined to prove that it could. Neither pursuit was all that conducive to actually identifying their feelings.

"I don't want to leave things like this." Jane lifted her to sit on her countertop.

"Neither do I." Lisbon agreed as she wrapped one leg around his hip pulling him close.

"Then we take a chance and make sure we win in the end." Jane said as he reached out to button the third button on his shirt that she just happened to be wearing.

If he'd needed any proof of her feelings, seeing her wearing his shirt swept any doubts away. He hadn't been expecting that. To grab his discarded shirt from the floor after an intimate moment was one thing. To actively seek out one of his shirts stuffed in the back of a closet something else entirely. She'd wanted to be wrapped in something of his even thinking he'd taken the cowardly exit while she was sleeping. The sad truth was he had even if he'd come back in the end. He hadn't been able to leave her.

And, as tempting as Lisbon was at the moment, and as much as he wasn't adverse to the idea of taking her on her kitchen counter, awkward angles aside, they had too much to discuss before they got lost in the carnal yet again as he was sure they eventually would.

"We can do that." Lisbon agreed using both of her legs to pull him even closer. "But, we're going to get a couple of things straight from the start. You aren't sticking to me like superglue or interfering with me doing my job. I can take care of myself. Got it? Oh, and there's no monkey business at work or on road trips as that's strictly professional. And…."

Jane cut her off with a teasing kiss.

"And we keep this a secret as long we can." He finished for her. "It'll make things easier on everyone."

"I think it will." Lisbon nodded her head.

"I think you're right." Jane agreed with her.

"While it's going to come out eventually," Lisbon wouldn't allow either of them to sweep the truth under the rug. "I think we can buy some time to figure out the best way to handle the fallout when it does."

"I don't see why we can't." Jane agreed knowing he could easily shut down any of the fallout that might lead to them getting separated. What he couldn't completely control was going to be the painful backlash they both knew was coming. The nasty commentary better left unsaid. "Think before you answer, Teresa." Jane advised as he rubbed her back soothingly. "It's going to get messier than you think. Are you prepared for that?"

"Maybe not yet; but, I think I can handle Bertram." She answered honestly.

"It's not Bertram I'm concerned about." Jane corrected her. "Besides, if he's Red John which neither of us really believes, he probably already knows. He's no doubt laughing his ass off at our feeble attempts to stay away from each other and our ludicrous attempts to keep the fact we can't from coming out."

"I'd say you've finally seen the light." Lisbon resisted the urge to kick him in the shins.

"It's the people we work with, not for, that I'm concerned about. Unlike Rigsby and Van Pelt, they know better than to try to separate us. If I don't miss my guess, the higher ups will turn the other way instead of deal with the problem. Give us a slap on the hand and tell us to be discreet; but, the damage will already be done. The rest of your fellow Agents will react exactly as we expect. It'll get pretty nasty before it gets better. Are you truly prepared for all the unpleasant things they're going to say?" Jane searched for the truth in her eyes.

"Yes, Patrick, I think I am." Lisbon gave him the only answer she could.

She'd just have to make sure her words were true by the time everything came undone.

"Then there's the fact he's eventually going to come after you as well." Jane reminded her.

"Like that's a big secret." Lisbon said facetiously. "I guess I'll just have to be ready when he does."

"We'll have to be ready." He corrected her.

"Maybe he'll come after you instead." That thought send a frisson of fear up her spine.

"He very well could." Jane agreed. "He could; but, he won't. He might go after a member of the team instead."

"Van Pelt." Lisbon gave voice to what they were both thinking.

"Most likely since she's female; but, she's with Rigsby now. The two of them are all but sewn together at the hip. That being said, I'd say she's safe enough for the time being although we don't want either of them taking any unnecessary chances or getting slack." Jane elaborated. "I think if Red John comes after anyone, you're still the most likely target.

He restated his intent earlier today with that blood tinged rose."

"But not if you're here." Lisbon stated what they were both thinking.

"You won't be as easy to get, no." Jane agreed. "But, still easier than I'd like."

"I've been more of a mark than either of us would like since I accept the Red John case." Lisbon reminded him. "Nothing's really changed because we're sleeping together. We're hardly a couple."

"While I deserve that, I hope it isn't what you believe." Jane said quietly. "We are definitely a couple. As much as I might wish I could stay away, I keep coming back. Even knowing I'm endangering you…So, yes, I'd say we're very much a couple. If we aren't, we soon will be."

"You're plotting to move in here, aren't you?" Lisbon cocked a brow at him not sure how she felt about that idea.

Jane drove her nuts as it was.

"I'm plotting to be here as much as you'll let me." Jane corrected her deciding he'd push the point at a later date.

"I can live with that." She'd just kick him out when he got on her last nerve.

"Good."Jane ran his fingers over her arm. "I don't like the idea of you being here by yourself that much. Not knowing he's clearly fascinated with the first woman who's captured my interest since Angela or that he has been for a while."

"Your interest?" Lisbon's tone was anything but flattered. "Is that what we're calling it now?"

"Do you really want me to say it?" Jane gave her a disbelieving glare.

"Yeah, I think I do." Lisbon agreed. "No woman wants to be interesting."

"Well, you are…interesting; but, you're a whole lot more as you already know." Jane stroked her arm. "My heart, Teresa, you've captured my heart much as Angela ever did."

"I'm supposed to believe that?" Considering she'd always known how he felt about his wife and doubted he could ever feel that way again, Lisbon didn't think so.

"Yes, Teresa, you are." Jane said quietly. "I've learned an important lesson recently."

"What's that?" Lisbon wasn't sure she wanted to know given his tone.

"While you can never take Angela's place in my life," Jane captured her gaze with his. "She could never take yours either."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lisbon's gaze was confused.

"That I care for you every bit as much as I did her." Jane said quietly. "And I've finally accepted that I'm a selfish bastard who can't let you go when we both know I should."

"I don't want you to let me go." Lisbon said quietly even though her head was spinning. She'd expected a lot of things when Jane turned back up on her doorstep…Most of them bad. However, nothing they'd just discussed was even on her list. "You have to know I feel the same. Barlow told you."

Much as Lorelei had confirmed how Jane felt so long ago. Not that she'd believed the woman at the time. Jane had been acting much too squirrely for a while for her to take anything at face value back then.

"I knew a long time before that as you should have known about me long before Lorelei said anything." Jane removed her leg from around his hip before lifting her from the countertop to stand beside him. "You sell yourself much too short, Teresa. You always have."

"Shush, Jane, you're a hard man to read." Lisbon said in her defense.

"I suppose I am." Jane agreed. "We've talked enough for now…Said things we both need to digest…We can work out the specifics of how we're going to do this later."

Once he'd had more time to think things through.

He hadn't gotten any farther in his thought process than moving more of his things into Lisbon's guest room and himself into her bed. While she hadn't totally nixed the idea, she hadn't embraced it with open arms either. He'd broach the specifics with her later. Preferably when she was satiated and vulnerable to suggestions she might shoot down another time.

Jane admitted he wasn't above using such devious means to get what he wanted and he wanted Lisbon. He'd been totally wrong in thinking he could start this thing and walk away. It would be one thing if it was only physical; but, it wasn't. He had no one to blame but himself for finding himself trapped by his feelings. He'd known better and he'd done it anyway.

Banishing the negative thoughts flooding his mind, Jane turned his attention back to Lisbon.

"For now, why don't you make yourself another cup of coffee while I fix us something to eat? After that we'll have the rest of the day to catch up on some much needed rest among other things."

"You drive a hard bargain." Lisbon added cream to her coffee more interested in the other things than the rest.

"Yeah, well, I only want what's best for you." Jane grabbed a carton of eggs and a bag of cheese from the refrigerator.

"I know." Lisbon said as she took a sip from her cup. "Whether you believe it or not, you are what's best for me."

"While that remains to be seen, I certainly know you're what's best for me." Jane dropped a kiss on her lips as he reached for a bowl from the cabinet. "Why don't you have a seat and relax? I'll be done in a few minutes."

"Is that your way of telling me I'm in the way?" Lisbon added another half teaspoon of sugar to her too strong coffee.

"That's my way of telling you to rest." Jane cracked an egg and discarded the shell. "You're going to need it later."

"I like the way you think." Lisbon patted his rear as she carried her coffee over to her dining room table.

"I thought you might." Jane cast a glance in her direction as he buttered a few pieces of toast before sticking the pan in the oven.

"You knew I would." Lisbon hid the tiniest of victory smiles behind her cup as she decided she'd finally gotten her coffee just right.

Watching Jane scramble enough eggs to feed an army of Rigsbys, Lisbon was happy to have won the skirmish. But, she wasn't stupid enough to think she'd won the war. Something bad would happen and Jane would balk. Decide being apart was the only way to keep her safe when nothing would be farther from the truth. She could already see all of that coming. But, she wasn't going to sweat it. She'd just head him off at the pass which shouldn't prove that difficult.

Jane kept proving he couldn't stay away.

No matter how hard he tried.

And she intended to keep it that way.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Tina, Anna, and guest, thank you for the reviews and for still enjoying this story!~Calla

I'll be hitting NTB with another chapter as soon as it's finished.

And, miracle of miracles considering RL lately, I've managed to get something done on both fanfics and on editing both the Contemporary Romantic Suspense and the Historical Romance so my life isn't a total wreck! LOL. ~Calla

#####

Dropping a couple of pats of butter into the frying pan to melt, Jane walked over to Lisbon's pantry to find that jar of Provencal Lavender Honey he'd purchased at the Farmer's Market. Glancing at her mostly bare cupboard, he decided they'd have to hit the store before the day was over. Or rather he would. He seriously doubted Lisbon would want to risk anyone seeing them making a grocery run together this early in the game. Tongues would start wagging in the wrong direction.

There was no need for that to happen before it was necessary.

Strolling over to the stove to give the butter one last swirl, he poured the eggs into the frying pan and waited for them to set. He'd add the cheese at the appropriate moment and fold it in. While he'd much prefer to showboat by tossing together a couple of complex omelets, neither he nor Lisbon wanted to waste that much time when it was much better spent. Besides, he wasn't even sure she had the necessary ingredients on hand given the sorry state of her refrigerator and pantry. Not that he blamed her for not stocking up. It was much easier to grab something on the run when they were spending most of their time at the CBI.

Besides, he could fix those omelets in the morning after his grocery run when he had plenty of onions, peppers, mushrooms, asparagus, and ham on hand. Maybe he'd add a couple of different cheeses to the mix. Oh, and he'd get some of that chewy Artisan bread Lisbon favored along with those God awful much too strong coffee beans she indulged in once in a while. The really expensive ones making him ask her if she wanted a little coffee with her sugar and cream.

Folding the eggs over one final time, Jane mounded the fluffy deliciousness on two plates giving Lisbon the lion's share. He hoped she would take the hint and gobble up every bite. She was getting a little on the thinner-than-he-liked-her side. It was one of the hazards of being a detective and caring about her job. She tended to get so wrapped up in cases she forgot to eat like she should and crap from the vending machine or a snack from the terrace didn't count as real food in his book. Especially not he junk food she liked.

Adding a couple of slices of buttered toast to their plates, he carried their breakfast to the table along with the jar of honey. Settling Lisbon's eggs in front of her, he watched her slather her toast with honey before turning on his heel. Walking back into the kitchen he poured a couple of glasses of purple grape juice and carried them to the table as well. Lisbon had already refreshed her coffee and his tea at some point while he was cooking. From the looks of things, they were pretty much set for the time being.

Sinking into his chair, Jane watched Lisbon carry a fork full of eggs to her mouth as he dribbled honey across his toast. Taking a bite of his eggs, Jane decided he'd done a fair enough job on such short notice. The eggs were light as they should be with just the right amount of cheese and the toast wasn't burned. Sounded all right to him and, judging by the fact she was still eating, Lisbon seemed to feel the same way.

"Patrick." Lisbon suddenly placed her hand on top of his diverting his attention from his eggs.

"Teresa." Whatever she had to say was important as she'd stopped stuffing her face.

"You're going to balk again aren't you?" Lisbon captured his gaze.

"Probably." Jane agreed knowing that protective instinct urging him to pull away would activate as soon as the next bloody flower or blood dripping smiley face appeared on the scene. "But, I won't stay away. You know I can't."

"Then don't do it in the first place…It hurts too badly." Lisbon reluctantly admitted. "I can't take the way I feel watching you walk away again. If I'm getting in this deep, I need to know you're right here with me. That what we have is worth fighting for from this point on. Otherwise, it's better for everyone if we just call it quits."

"I think it's worth fighting for." Jane reassured her. "And while I can't promise I won't start to pull away, I'll do my best not to finish."

"I guess that's all I can ask." Lisbon snagged a slice of his toast and took a big bite.

"Hey, that's mine." Jane placed what was left of his toast back on his plate.

"That's why it tastes better." Lisbon agreed. "Because it's yours and other people's food always tastes better. You know that."

"Yes, well, eat your own even if it doesn't taste as good." Jane said as he took another bite of eggs.

"Actually, it's delicious." Lisbon silently admitted to herself that his eggs were much better than hers before turning her attention back to Jane. "Oh, and you can't move in."

"No, I can't." Jane agreed. "That would be too obvious don't you think?"

"Yeah, I think." Lisbon resisted the urge to smack that condescending smile off his face. "And you can't start moving a whole lot of clothes in here either."

"I can't; but you can a little at a time." Jane pushed his empty plate aside. "Start by picking up my things at the dry cleaners when you pick up yours on Tuesday. No one will think anything about it. Cassandra knows we work together and it won't be the first time we've picked each other's laundry up over the years."

"I can slip a suit and a couple of shirts in my bags and give you the rest after work. No one will know the difference. That way you'll have a couple of suits and a few shirts to change into when you stay over." Lisbon easily fell in with his plan.

"Or maybe I'll pick everything up when I go out to get everyone's lunch." Jane decided knowing the devil was in the details. "I usually do the dry cleaning run since it's easier for me to leave than you and it would make sense that I'd do it while I was out on our regular Tuesday lunch run."

"Sounds like a plan." Lisbon gazed at her plate not believing she'd eaten the massive pile of eggs Jane had loaded on her plate.

Then again she'd been really hungry. She'd forgone supper last night in favor of working on the case. And, where she would have gotten a snack when she arrived home, she'd entertained company instead. Or maybe she'd been "entertained" instead.

"You can't start spending the night here every night either." Lisbon reminded him.

Not only would it blow their cover really fast, she wasn't sure she could stand that much togetherness.

"No, I don't suppose I can." Jane resisted the urge to laugh at the gravity of her tone. "I see you're finally starting to work things out in your head, My Dear; but, you're making it much too hard."

"I'm making it much too hard?" Lisbon shot him a dirty look. "You're the one who said we couldn't be together then changed his mind."

"I'm the one who said it shouldn't have happened in the first place." Jane gently reminded her. "Now that it has, I'm the one admitting I was wrong…But, you're the one making everything much too difficult."

"Then make it simple for me." Lisbon carried their plates into the kitchen and tucked them into the dishwasher before walking back to take her seat.

"Nothing changes." Jane said as though it was the most logical thing in the world. "We normally have dinner together one or two nights a week anyway. We stick to the same plan we've followed for years."

Lisbon nodded her head knowing what he said was true. They did have dinner once or twice a week, sometimes more, with predictable regularity. Unless Jane went into one of his funks and pulled away from everyone. Or they suddenly started sleeping together. Whatever, their dinner dates had been more on than off over the years.

Then there were the times she couldn't drag him out of his damned bat cave because he was hot on a lead. Truthfully, she hadn't had nearly as much trouble with that over the last few months. Not since she'd gotten her first "gift" from her Secret Admirer. Jane had immediately started paying more attention to her.

With hindsight, she now realized he'd been reacting to the idea someone was poaching on _his_ territory. He hadn't seen such a thing coming. But, once it had, he hadn't liked it at all. So, he'd set out to make it all go away in typical Jane fashion. One of those ways had been by being available when she'd wanted a dinner companion. What a sneaky, selfish bastard. His little Jane games were almost worse than him wrecking her dates…almost, but not quite.

All of that aside, he was right.

They usually cooked at her place or enjoyed takeout at his one or two times a week. They spent so much time together at work over the years it was perfectly natural they'd spend time outside of work together as well. It wasn't like either of them had a life. And she certainly didn't mind those rare evenings she spent at his place. There was nothing wrong with Jane's hotel room other than it was a little run down and somewhat depressing. On the plus side, it was always clean and tidy which she couldn't always say for her apartment. It depended on how much midnight oil she'd been burning.

"I usually spend at least one night every couple of weeks on your couch as well and I have for years." Jane continued. "I don't see any reason we should change."

"So you're saying we stick to what we've always done?" Lisbon asked. "You come to my place and I go to yours."

"That's exactly what I'm saying." Jane agreed as he carried their cups into the kitchen and set them on the counter.

As a certain brunette would want another cup of coffee relatively soon, and he'd want another cup of tea, there was no reason to put them in the dishwasher yet. Walking back into the dining room, he took Lisbon by the hand and guided her into the den.

"We'll just keep doing what we've always done with a new twist that's nobody's business but our own. Hopefully we can toss in an occasional evening at a nice restaurant as well." He commented as he watched Lisbon settle into her end of the couch while he settled into his.

"You've got to be kidding me." Lisbon snorted trying to make light of the moment. "You actually want to take me on a date? It's not necessary to wine me and dine me, Patrick. You're already in my pants."

"Maybe I want to." Green eyes peered into green dismissing her falsely cavalier attitude. "I'd also say I'm slightly more than just in your pants."

"I'd say we've been dating for years." Lisbon observed quietly. "We just didn't realize it."

"Then it wasn't a date." Jane corrected her. "I want to sit beside you with both of us knowing exactly what we're doing. I want to feed you steak from my plate and swipe your cheesecake. Humor me, Teresa, I promise it'll be fun."

"But you can't do any of that yet." Lisbon reminded him. "We can't act like it's a date."

"Maybe not." Jane agreed. "But, we'll know and we're all that counts."

"I suppose that makes a twisted kind of sense." Lisbon laughed at the idea of going on an actual date with Jane.

He was right. She'd probably have fun. He'd have to a be a heck of a lot more amusing than her usual dates.

"It does." Jane assured her. "Teresa, it's important that you understand I'm not prearranging booty calls. I'm interested in spending time with you. If something happens, it happens. If it doesn't, we'll enjoy being together."

Jane's tone was much too serious in Lisbon's opinion.

If she didn't know he really cared about her by now, or that she felt the same, she was a complete and utter fool. Nothing could be farther from the truth. She was actually quite sharp and she didn't mind saying it. As for the prearranged booty calls, she kind of liked that idea. It gave her something worthwhile to look forward to at the end of a frustrating day.

"While that's very noble of you, Patrick, maybe I'm interested in both." Lisbon couldn't resist a wicked grin as she gave him the once over. "I happen to like booty calls with you. I like them a lot. There's something about the way you wiggle those hips that drives me insane."

Sweeping her eyes over him, Jane decided to take her words at face value. Lisbon's expression was as predatory as he'd ever seen on a woman…predatory and lascivious. He'd only seen that look on her face once. She'd had him cornered in the shower doing unspeakable things with her mouth, her teeth, and her tongue. Things making him mewl like a girl…Lisbon's words, not his…She'd teased him mercilessly until he'd taught her what _he_ could do with his mouth, teeth, and tongue...She'd learned pretty quickly how mewling like a girl really sounded considering she _was_ a girl.

As for Lisbon, she'd already decided Jane looked much too delectable with a few extra buttons undone and his sleeves rolled up to be wasting time on all of this unnecessarily serious drivel. Yes, it was true they still had issues to hammer out. But, none of them had to be chiseled in stone immediately.

To be perfectly honest, right now she was more interested in how long it would take her to get Jane naked than planning their first date. As for the rest of it, they could iron out the finer points of keeping their togetherness a secret much, much later. At the moment she found those images of infamous "other things" flooding her mind far more interesting than words.

"There is, huh?" Mischief danced in his eyes as he watched her wriggling uncomfortably in a very revealing way.

"Oh, yeah." Lisbon leaned her chin on her clasped knees not caring he was openly ogling the small strip of panty exposed by her unladylike position.

What did she really care? Let him look.

As they'd been up close and personal more than once, she could confidently say he'd already seen bits far more provocative than that sliver of silky nylon between her legs. Besides, just looking at him was getting her all hot and bothered and he knew it. And from what she could see, he wasn't doing much better. Gazing into Jane's eyes, she shot him a knowing look not at all surprised he wasn't chastened in the least she'd caught him being openly naughty. Laughing at her not-so-offended snort, Jane stretched out on the couch crooking a beckoning finger in her direction.

Shaking her head, Lisbon refused to blindly comply with his wishes. As bad as she wanted him, she wasn't that easy. She really wasn't. Like all he had to do was bend that finger and she'd slither up his thighs like a snake. Then again, there was a very nice, um, "package" under all those clothes and what he could do with what he had was nothing short of original sin.

"Come on, Teresa." Jane coaxed. "You know you want to."

Laughing at his audacity, she crawled over Jane's legs enjoying his sharp intake of breath when she suddenly straddled his waist clearly appreciating the feel of a certain part of him against her heat.

"Want to what?" Lisbon asked as she began unbuttoning his shirt without so much as a by your leave. "Get you out of all of these unnecessary clothes and have my way with you?"

"Something like that." Jane flashed a smile making Lisbon realize just how rare an occurrence that was and how much she adored it when he did. "Or, preferably, let me have mine with you."

"Yeah, well, what can I say?" Lisbon asked as she tossed his shirt away before turning her attention to his belt buckle. "I've discovered a fondness for naked Jane."

"Is that anything like your fondness for coffee or chocolate?" Jane asked as he plucked at the waistband of her panties.

"Better." Lisbon admitted as she tossed his pants over to land somewhere in the vicinity of his shirt.

"I'm flattered." Jane said as he ran his hands under her unbuttoned, loosely hanging shirt and over her back enjoying the play of skin over skin.

"You should be." Lisbon agreed. "I think it's a first."

Sweeping her tongue against Jane's lip in invitation, Lisbon decided she could get used to starting her day like this. She definitely could. _If_ her lover intended dealing appropriately with the sudden rush of heat roiling through her veins at the provocatively open mouthed kiss they were currently exchanging…Something along the lines of naked flesh slipping and sliding against naked flesh enthusiastically…She could get used to that really fast.

She'd already gotten used to it if she was honest.

How could she not? Jane approached sex the same way he approached taking down the bad guys…The man was all in…Wait a minute. That didn't sound right. Not the all in part. That was spot on…But, the sex part…They didn't have sex…They communicated with their bodies what they weren't quite ready to say with their mouths.

As for her, she was the same way.

It wasn't like she indulged her libido often or allowed just any man into her bed. She didn't. Compared to most of her co-workers, she was the poster child for abstinence and Jane was the only man she'd ever been intimate with in her home. Besides keeping unwanted memories at bay once she'd dumped the guy, it was much neater and safer that way. She'd seen too many things happen when a "relationship" went south in her years as a cop. Things that usually got messy fast and she wanted none of it. Fortunately, she was sure that wouldn't happen with Jane.

Speaking of Jane, he was slipping his fingers beneath the waistband of her panties with undisguised intent. Lifting her rear, she dropped her chin and giggled at the determined way he was sliding the offending garment down her legs and off her feet to go flying through the air in some indeterminate direction. Catching his eye, she laughed out loud at the supremely pleased look on his face.

"You were overdressed." He mumbled in his defense.

"I suppose I was; but, it seems you've taken care of the problem." Lisbon agreed.

"Yes, I have." Jane allowed his eyes to roam over her face before dropping lower appreciatively.

It never ceased to amaze him that, no matter the circumstance, the woman was always beautiful in his eyes. She had been for years. There was something about those emotive eyes and that tentative smile he found captivating. And while he didn't have an aversion to more voluptuous women, and he'd certainly never kick one out of bed were he ever available for such shenanigans which he wasn't, he found Lisbon's curves perfect for her diminutive size. If that weren't enough, he'd discovered their sexual appetites were well watched. He'd quickly figured out his "Boss" could keep up with him and she'd certainly never bore him as she was full of surprises. And far more playful than one might think.

But, the icing on the cake was the unconditional love and acceptance he'd never expected to feel again. Not after Angela died and certainly not from Teresa Lisbon. She'd proven him wrong over the years. He realized that now and only hoped he could give her back but the smallest portion of what she'd given him. Starting with what she so obviously wanted at the moment.

"But, I think we have other problems." Lisbon stated as she moved against him suggestively.

"Do you now?" Jane's hands slid over her breasts, across her stomach, and over her hips to cup her bottom.

"Yes, I do." Lisbon said as she closed her eyes reaching out to sweep her hands over his chest and shoulders enjoying the feel of hard muscle beneath her palms.

Following suit, Jane closed his eyes appreciating the nuances of her delicate touch as she explored the chiaroscuro of his body reacquainting herself with every definable dip and line. Inhaling sharply, he watched her take his hardness into her hands, stroking his length enticingly, as he suddenly struggled not to come undone at her knowing touch. Though no Mentalist, his Lisbon was clearly a quick study which he would appreciate under different circumstances. As it was, he'd prefer their encounter not end before it ever truly began as was suddenly much too close to happening.

Halting the teasing hands, Jane lifted Lisbon's hips without preamble and slid home confident that she was more than ready. He marveled at the beautifully taunt line of her arching back, the sensuality gleaming from beneath half-closed lids, and the breathless sighs of pleasure passing kiss swollen lips. There was no denying his lover was a most exquisite creature in passion ridden moments like this. He'd noticed that from the start.

Feeling her eyelids flutter at the undeniably OMG moment, Lisbon savored the feel of Jane's touch without and his hardness within. They'd taken much too long to get to this point and, now that they had, she wasn't letting go. From the tightness of his grip on her hips, she didn't think Jane was either. She didn't think she be on top much longer either even if her lover was controlling their pace.

"I like you like this." Jane ran his hand through her hair.

"Like what?" Lisbon worried her bottom lip as she watched him through half closed lids. "You feel so damned good."

He felt much too large…She felt much too small…And the "pain" was killing her in the best possible ways…She was in such blissful agony….She hoped it never ended...

"Tousled and flushed and up to something." Jane glanced briefly at their cojoined bodies before capturing her gaze again. He laughed at the look she shot him clearly saying she wasn't the one up to something. He was, and she sincerely appreciated every inch of it. "I like this, too." He ran his hand over her cheek, along her jaw, and down her neck before lightly caressing the edge of his shirt as well as the skin beneath his palm. "You wearing nothing but my shirt while we're like this.

Teresa, you're so beautiful you take my breath away."

Closing her eyes, Lisbon fought back tears as she leaned forward to nibble at Jane's bottom lip inviting him to draw her into another mind numbing kiss. Complying with her wishes, he leaned up to flick his tongue against her lips demanding the entrance she so willing gave him. Leaning up and pulling her into him, Jane plundered her mouth with the same finesse with which he plundered her body.

Lisbon groaned against Jane's lips when he easily flipped them over burying his hardness even deeper within her. Arching her back and lifting her hips, she silently prayed he would hit that exact same spot with his next thrust...The one making her see stars and not just any stars…Ones quite literally shooting across her eyelids in brilliant, multicolored glory…And ones having far more to do with how tightly said lids were scrunched shut in her quest for that elusive precipice edge than anything Jane was doing to her…But, she wasn't telling him that.

She'd keep telling him how good he felt instead.

Keep running her hands over his sweat slickened back reveling in the contraction and release of hard muscle beneath her fingertips. Keep hiking her legs a little higher and a little tighter around his waist as he lifted her hips angling for a deeper thrust. Keep pushing back with an erratic rhythm silently speaking of her loss of control. Keep begging in that demeaning manner he not quit twisting his hips in the way rapidly flinging her into a temporary state of carnal insanity.

Feeling Lisbon's blunt nails digging into his back, Jane sucked in a calming breath. That the woman beneath him was responding with such abandoned wantonness was driving him out of his mind. Her passion was going to be his undoing in the most embarrassing of ways if things continued as they were. That wouldn't do. It wouldn't do at all. He'd never left a partner behind as he found his pleasure and he wasn't starting now.

Whispering lascivious words in her ear as his fingers stroked her intimately, Jane felt Lisbon tightening around him as she pushed back into his thrusts taking him as deeply as possible into her welcoming body. Increasing the tempo of his thrusts as the tension wound tighter, he let himself go as she splintered around him. Riding the crest of Lisbon's release, Jane spilled within her silently wishing things were different. That they could have more than this.

Could have the life he'd once had with another woman complete with cherished byproducts of their love.

Unfortunately, they couldn't.

Leaning over, he kissed Lisbon's neck as she collapsed into the couch beneath them. She was sweaty and breathless and mind numbing beautiful in all her rumbled, tousled glory. Lightly running his hand over her cheek as she gasped for breath, Jane eventually pulled her to her feet before tenderly kissing her lips and covering her with his shirt. Sliding into his boxers, he took Lisbon by the hand and led her towards the stairs.

There was nothing he wanted more at the moment than to fall asleep in their comfortable bed with Lisbon cradled safely in his arms.

#####

-I have now beaten the smut plunnie (plot bunny) back with a nice, soft, foam rubber carrot and locked her safely in her box. ~Calla


End file.
